The Kid That Won't Use a Kleenex

[mamamanda]

Dcg is very newly 5 & is sick more than any kid I've ever cared for. In one year's time she had hand foot & mouth 7 times, several ear infections, at least 2 sinus infections, strep throat, multiple colds, & the list could go on. Her nose runs constantly & I'm not exaggerating. She takes allergy medicine, but it doesn't help. Its frustrating to say the least, but the real issue I that I can't get her to use a Kleenex. Every time I look at her snot I dripping down her lips. The other kids get grossed out & tell her to get a Kleenex all day long, but that embarrasses her. She will wipe it on her shirt, pants, my carpet, bathroom hand towel, & the real kicker...my couch. We have discussed it until I'm blue in the face. She understands that I how we spread germs, but it doesn't matter. I put Kleenex boxes in her reach in every play area. I have to make her use them. On the rare occurrence that she does use one she leaves it laying in the floor. I make her go pick it up & throw it away, but next Tim its the same thing. I'm so frustrated & grossed out by this. Its no wonder my kids all pass sickness constantly. Today she's coughing again, not covering her mouth, & letting drool run down her chin afterward. Help! She's 5. That's old enough to get it, right!?!

[mommyneedsadayoff]

I would have to terminate care. I know that sounds heartless, but I would not be able to handle the gross factor. It would be a liability to me, sickness constantly being passed around and getting snot every where. Yuck! I guess the other thing would also be as a parent. If I had my kid in your care and this one cild was constantly sick and getting everyone else sick, I would probably look for other care. I wouldn't be able to afford the days off. Obviously, you cannot always blame just one child for illness passing through a daycare, but F & M 7 TIMES!?! That seems excessive and like she is not washing hands after bathroom visits or something. At 5, she should be able to wipe her nose and put it in the trash without constant reminders, especially if it is so frequent through the day. If she cannot keep up with her snot, then I would pass the buck to mom and dad and have them look for other care. That is just what I would do, because snot grosses me out, especially on older children. I hate being at the park/store/ect and seeing a kid with a snotty nose and no one does anything to wipe it. I have offered strangers a kleenex before, because it is just nasty.

[Snowmom]

Absolutely old enough to know better. I start with the "cover your mouth", "fingers out of the mouth", "fingers/hands/arms away from your nose" when they are 1.

Seriously, 7 times?!

I would also contemplate terminating, only because I don't have the time or energy to disinfect constantly after a child like that.
Realistically, sure, I understand kids get sick and spread germs. But washing my carpet and couch on top of the regular (and probably more frequent in this circumstance) disinfecting of toys is excessive.

[mamamanda]

Yes, I feel like all I do is clean. I can't even relax on the weekends with my family b/c I'm sanitizing everything for hours. I really don't want to term for several reasons. This family is a good friend, but I am out of ideas on stopping the behavior. Being sick is one thing. Purposely wiping your germs on my personal things is infuriating. I know she's a child, but I've just had enough of it.

[Snowmom]

Yes, I feel like all I do is clean. I can't even relax on the weekends with my family b/c I'm sanitizing everything for hours. I really don't want to term for several reasons. This family is a good friend, but I am out of ideas on stopping the behavior. Being sick is one thing. Purposely wiping your germs on my personal things is infuriating. I know she's a child, but I've just had enough of it.

Have you discussed it with the parents at all?
If you want to work on it with her, I'd see what the parents think about it.
Maybe explain the extra measures you need to take to disinfect (time and supplies) as well as how it affects the others in your care.
Tell them that you need to have a plan of action in order for dcg to understand that using preventative measures to contain her illnesses are important (as they will be in school in the near future as well).
Then, go from there?

[Shell]

I had a child like this a few years back (granted, she was only 3), but I completely understand how disgusting this is to deal with!

At age 5, it is just bizarre to me that she gets that sick (especially the hfm thing), but I suppose it's her lack of hygiene that allows for her to keep getting sick?

Could she have a compromised immune system? Do her parents work in the medical field, and "carry" home germs?

My dcg finally moved on to another daycare (parents were doctors) and the sickness absolutely stopped around here. It was like night and day.

I would talk to dcm about the tissue- this is a sanitary issue and needs to be addressed.
OR, you could ask one of us for some of our zillions of packets of boogie wipes and the hand pump sanitizer- that might work for dcg! ::

[daycarediva]

That is gross.

I would give it two weeks, be ON her about it. Blow nose, put in trash, wash hands. Catch it before hand. If there was no improvement, I would let her go. It sounds petty to say that, but there is NO WAY I could be on top of a child that age like an infant.

Have you spoken with the parents? I would tell them that it's an essential skill needed for kindergarten, and that it embarrasses her when the other children notice it.

Are there other developmental issues? How is everything else in the self help department? Are the parents just doing it for her constantly?

[Play Care]

Yes, I feel like all I do is clean. I can't even relax on the weekends with my family b/c I'm sanitizing everything for hours. I really don't want to term for several reasons. This family is a good friend, but I am out of ideas on stopping the behavior. Being sick is one thing. Purposely wiping your germs on my personal things is infuriating. I know she's a child, but I've just had enough of it.

I feel your pain. I had a 4 yo dcb who could read, add and subtract but not blow his own nose...

In my case he was so part time (one day a week) and I suspected some other issues that I decided not to tackle it at all. I treated him the same way I treated the under 2's. He was always close to me and I would use Kleenex on him as needed. Just like the under 2's he was never out of my sight and with in arms reach because I needed to keep a close eye on the nose situation. He was done in June and it was a relief. In some ways he was the coolest kid, but he had almost 0 self help skills...

When it was even worse than usual I moved his stations to the kitchen - away from carpets and furniture...

[Laurel]

Dcg is very newly 5 & is sick more than any kid I've ever cared for. In one year's time she had hand foot & mouth 7 times, several ear infections, at least 2 sinus infections, strep throat, multiple colds, & the list could go on. Her nose runs constantly & I'm not exaggerating. She takes allergy medicine, but it doesn't help. Its frustrating to say the least, but the real issue I that I can't get her to use a Kleenex. Every time I look at her snot I dripping down her lips. The other kids get grossed out & tell her to get a Kleenex all day long, but that embarrasses her. She will wipe it on her shirt, pants, my carpet, bathroom hand towel, & the real kicker...my couch. We have discussed it until I'm blue in the face. She understands that I how we spread germs, but it doesn't matter. I put Kleenex boxes in her reach in every play area. I have to make her use them. On the rare occurrence that she does use one she leaves it laying in the floor. I make her go pick it up & throw it away, but next Tim its the same thing. I'm so frustrated & grossed out by this. Its no wonder my kids all pass sickness constantly. Today she's coughing again, not covering her mouth, & letting drool run down her chin afterward. Help! She's 5. That's old enough to get it, right!?!

Don't flame me people :: but I heard of something another provider did when this happened. The solution is almost as gross as the problem to me but at least it puts the responsibility in the hands of the child. She had the child wear a large bib and wipe on that BUT when it got gross the child had a container to place it in and knew how to get another clean bib. I think the bib was the kind with just a hole in the top (those towel kinds) so the child didn't need to have it tied. You could ask the parent for as many as you think you'd need or charge her and you buy them and send them home to be washed each day. Yes, it might embarrass the child a little but hey they might want to use a tissue then. Or maybe she could wear a smock type apron with 2 large pockets in front. One with clean tissues and one for dirty until she remembers to put the dirty ones in the trash.

I really think I would tell the parents that I need a doctor's statement as to why her nose runs constantly and what measures are being tried to stop it as it is a sanitary issue in your house.

Laurel

[mamamanda]

Don't flame me people :: but I heard of something another provider did when this happened. The solution is almost as gross as the problem to me but at least it puts the responsibility in the hands of the child. She had the child wear a large bib and wipe on that BUT when it got gross the child had a container to place it in and knew how to get another clean bib. I think the bib was the kind with just a hole in the top (those towel kinds) so the child didn't need to have it tied. You could ask the parent for as many as you think you'd need or charge her and you buy them and send them home to be washed each day. Yes, it might embarrass the child a little but hey they might want to use a tissue then. Or maybe she could wear a smock type apron with 2 large pockets in front. One with clean tissues and one for dirty until she remembers to put the dirty ones in the trash.

I really think I would tell the parents that I need a doctor's statement as to why her nose runs constantly and what measures are being tried to stop it as it is a sanitary issue in your house.

Laurel

I actually really like the apron idea. That may work for her. I'll give it some thought. I'm too afraid she'd still be rolling around on furniture and things with the bib on so it would still be getting on the couch. Otherwise I would try it.