Help a new provider: Do I need to term for disrespect? Please help with this dcm.

[Hartingirl]

Thank you all so much for your help! Deleted for confidentiality purposes. Once again, thank you so much!

[rosieteddy]

If you want to keep this client .I would ask for a meeting.I would meet in the evening and without the child.Explain to the parent the reasons for the rules.Late arrival -puts child at a disadvantages eplain what(misses free play ,no snack,late for activities ect) Same thing for late pick up -disrupts your day .I would go over your contract with her.If she is not agreeable I would term. You should charge for all late pickups and drop offs.

[childcaremom]

Oh man. I feel you. I've got the same dcm.

I've gotten lots of great advice here and this is what I am doing.

1) Actively trying to replace. I am advertising and as soon as I have someone I will term this family. If finances are not holding you back, I would term immediately. I wish I could afford to term. They would have been gone a looong time ago. There is no reason for a dcm to act like this and no reason for you to put up with it.

I think you said it best: No one else has issues with your rules. It is NOT your rules. It is the dcm.

2) If you decide to keep her, print out your policies that she is not following and highlight them. Give them to her to read, verbally tell her to read them. Then follow up. Do you understand? Make sure she says yes.

I did not do this with my dcm b/c I have no intention of wasting more time with her (or more paper). I had a verbal convo instead. Asked her if it was clear. She said yes. So now it's over and I will remind her that she told me she understands.

3) Stick to your policies like glue. Don't let the child in after 10, period. Late fees. If you give this type an inch they will take a mile every single time. There is nothing wrong with policies. There is something wrong with someone agreeing to them and then complaining that they have to follow them.

4) Don't sweat it. Seriously. She gets pouty. So what. Let it go. It is HER issue, not yours. Continue on with a smile. Hard to do but so much better for my sanity.

5) If you haven't already, advertise to replace. Nobody needs this drama each day.

:hug:

[Hartingirl]

Oh man. I feel you. I've got the same dcm.

I've gotten lots of great advice here and this is what I am doing.

1) Actively trying to replace. I am advertising and as soon as I have someone I will term this family. If finances are not holding you back, I would term immediately. I wish I could afford to term. They would have been gone a looong time ago. There is no reason for a dcm to act like this and no reason for you to put up with it.

I think you said it best: No one else has issues with your rules. It is NOT your rules. It is the dcm.

2) If you decide to keep her, print out your policies that she is not following and highlight them. Give them to her to read, verbally tell her to read them. Then follow up. Do you understand? Make sure she says yes.

I did not do this with my dcm b/c I have no intention of wasting more time with her (or more paper). I had a verbal convo instead. Asked her if it was clear. She said yes. So now it's over and I will remind her that she told me she understands.

3) Stick to your policies like glue. Don't let the child in after 10, period. Late fees. If you give this type an inch they will take a mile every single time. There is nothing wrong with policies. There is something wrong with someone agreeing to them and then complaining that they have to follow them.

4) Don't sweat it. Seriously. She gets pouty. So what. Let it go. It is HER issue, not yours. Continue on with a smile. Hard to do but so much better for my sanity.

5) If you haven't already, advertise to replace. Nobody needs this drama each day.

:hug:

Amen! That's exactly what I realized about her a while ago. Any time I've had to address a policy with a reminder for any of my other dcf, it's been a complete non-issue. The dcp has acknowledged the mistake, corrected it immediately, and never crossed the line again. I can't believe I've had to confront issues so many times... how uncomfortable!

Thank you so much for your response. You said a lot of things that made me feel so much better! You're absolutely right!