DCF Does Not Inform Me Of Plans...

[alicia@home]

I have recently had a fairly major change in how my daycare works. When I lost one family, I decided to keep it the way it is, meaning I only care for one family's 2 (soon to be 3) children. It's a lot simpler and my day is more enjoyable.

Anyways, it didn't bother me previously that they never told me their plans until the last minute, but now...I feel a bit irritated because they're my only family. If they're not here, I could go on vacation or grocery shopping or whatever it is I want to do! At the end of the month they will be gone Wed-Fri and I only know this because I invited them to a little get together that Sat and dcm mentioned the little vacation (I still had to clarify that they would be gone in a later conversation). Then today, she shows up with the SA child and the other is home with dad. His dad is going to drop him off some time before lunch, maybe...?! what...

Writing this down is making me realize that I just need to have a conversation with them about it, but am I wrong to feel annoyed? They pay me regardless, am I suppose to just be here all day because of that? Maybe I just needed to get this out.

[finsup]

I don't allow families to do that. I plan activities, supplies/food amounts, and appointments based upon families schedules. If they don't give them to me, it makes it really hard to do that. What I would do is require schedules for the week (days, hours and how many kids) to be sumbited by such and such a day and time (like 5pm Friday for the following week). If they don't, refuse care. If they try to drop off early, remind them you open at the time they gave you in the first place. I tell families if schedule changes arise they need to ASK me first and I will let them know if I can accommodate it (sometimes I say "no" just so they don't think they can do it all the time).
Yeah...I really like knowing who to expect and when during the week .

[Shell]

They probably think because theirs is the only family you care for, that it's a more casual relationship, and they can now come and go as they please.

I would set a date/time that schedules need to be in, like pp said.

Any changes past that date/time can't be accommodated. Just tell them you make plans/appointments based on this info, and so you need advanced warning.

Trust me, I dealt with a similar family (my only full timers ), for three years. If I had done this from the beginning, I could have saved myself aggravation and gone places and done things outside of the house.

[KiddieCahoots]

This would be the only reason I don't like to take siblings.
Sometimes the dcp's know they have you over a barrel finacially, and treat you more like their personal nanny, than daycare provider.
Hopefully that's not what this family is doing.
What pp's have said with an advance schedule would be my route to go as well.

[alicia@home]

I didn't even think of that! I like having a casual relationship and I would think that would make me more privy to their plans, but guess not. This is not the first time my laid back approach has led to issues such as this. hmmm...but I don't want to be to business-like. I obviously need to find a balance!

Thank you all for the suggestion, I think this is a fairly simple issue to resolve. Really it benefits both of us for me to know their schedule. I would gladly make appts for myself and family around her schedule, and then I wouldn't need to take days off!
THANK YOU!

[finsup]

I didn't even think of that! I like having a casual relationship and I would think that would make me more privy to their plans, but guess not. This is not the first time my laid back approach has led to issues such as this. hmmm...but I don't want to be to business-like. I obviously need to find a balance!

Thank you all for the suggestion, I think this is a fairly simple issue to resolve. Really it benefits both of us for me to know their schedule. I would gladly make appts for myself and family around her schedule, and then I wouldn't need to take days off!
THANK YOU!

I started out that way too. Wanted to have a more personal relationship with families and be more flexible then other places to "help parents out." Good intentions but I got taken advantage of often. Also got burned out fast...I was trying so hard to be less business like thinking it would be appreciated only to find it was just taken advantage of. One family it did work out, they are wonderful and have had their son with me for the past 2 years. But they were the only ones from the ways I used to do things that actually worked out. What I did was wrote down what was most important/nessacary to have things run smoothly and effectively and based my policies around that. You can definitely find a balance, it just takes some time to do so. Every family good or bad has resulted in learning something new about how I want go do things with the next one!

[Unregistered]

If you really like the family and want to keep working with them, then just be honest. I would actually give them MY schedule and have them work around it. It sounds like they have flexibilty to do that, so just on Fridays, hand them your schedule and say these are the days you can work. If they need more days or to use one of the days you have scheduled off, then you can decide if you can be flexible and change your plans, but at least this way, you get control back of your schedule. And tell them that if they cancel a day, they need to call you the day before, so you can make other plans. It is a respect issue and they may not even realize they are doing it.

[TSDaycare]

This also drives me crazy! ! I find it very inconsiderate of the parents. Common courtesy in my book would tell you it would be nice to inform your provider in case she has something to do., but for some reason most parents don't think like that! I've have parents assume I have children and open every single day at 630.....nope, so it is not ok for you to just show up too!!! I just don't understand some peoples ways of thinking!

[Play Care]

If you really like the family and want to keep working with them, then just be honest. I would actually give them MY schedule and have them work around it. It sounds like they have flexibilty to do that, so just on Fridays, hand them your schedule and say these are the days you can work. If they need more days or to use one of the days you have scheduled off, then you can decide if you can be flexible and change your plans, but at least this way, you get control back of your schedule. And tell them that if they cancel a day, they need to call you the day before, so you can make other plans. It is a respect issue and they may not even realize they are doing it.

[cheerfuldom]

I think if they pay you for full time hours, you need to be available for those. However, there is nothing wrong with requiring the week's schedule by Monday morning and insisting that everyone stick to the schedule so that you can plan family time around their daycare needs.

[alicia@home]

hold my hand here...

OK, so I know this is silly, but I get so in my head about having these simple conversations. It just comes out so awkward and uncomfortable for me. How would you start the conversation?
I really like this family and enjoy the boys. They pay on time, pick up early, we have similar parenting styles, it just works. So, this is not a big huge deal, but it would be nice to know that I will have a day because I have things that I want to do as well.

Thanks in advance!

[alicia@home]

I think if they pay you for full time hours, you need to be available for those. However, there is nothing wrong with requiring the week's schedule by Monday morning and insisting that everyone stick to the schedule so that you can plan family time around their daycare needs.

Oh yes, I have no problem being available full time. I just think it's in everybody's best interest to communicate these things. I can take time for myself on the same days as dcf or I can take my time on days when they need to work...