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Never mind, I was rambling and didn't like where it went. LOL
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Um, okay...Haha that question doesn't really work: you are an adult. If that happens on the bus I would think you are probably psychologically/emotionally disturbed and I'd be scared and try to stare out the window and not make eye contact
if you are 0-5, I would feel sorry for you and your adult but not say anything or think much of it!
...sorry I tried to help you understand the concept in a different light...I wasn't trying to be funny or sarcastic.
It saddens me that you have issues with a child being given privacy to cry but would feel sorry for a human being struggling emotionally just because they are over 5.....
You mentioned being scared....why? Wouldn't the same concept apply to a child. As an adult at least you could process or somewhat understand what crying is but children don't have that ability yet.
Like Rockgirl said.....I don't see a difference. Listening to someone else cry for long periods of time is not any easier to deal with just because of the age of the crier.
Also, what about the provider? Have you ever done research or looked into the psychological affects of listening to someone cry for ling periods of time?
It's astounding the effect it has on our brains and out ability to focus or carry out other tasks. It plays a role in our physical and emotional health.Comment
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But, BC...since when do our feelings and needs count? We should really be not only doing anything and everything to prevent these poor little muffins from shedding a single tear, but we really should be doing it for free, don't you think?Um, okay...
...sorry I tried to help you understand the concept in a different light...I wasn't trying to be funny or sarcastic.
It saddens me that you have issues with a child being given privacy to cry but would feel sorry for a human being struggling emotionally just because they are over 5.....
You mentioned being scared....why? Wouldn't the same concept apply to a child. As an adult at least you could process or somewhat understand what crying is but children don't have that ability yet.
Like Rockgirl said.....I don't see a difference. Listening to someone else cry for long periods of time is not any easier to deal with just because of the age of the crier.
Also, what about the provider? Have you ever done research or looked into the psychological affects of listening to someone cry for ling periods of time?
It's astounding the effect it has on our brains and out ability to focus or carry out other tasks. It plays a role in our physical and emotional health.Comment
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I really, truly believe it depends on the child. I have one that cries over everything some days, and he's been that way since he was an older infant. He has very strong feelings. It's 100 times worse in the presence of his mother (who I adore), and most Mondays, it's not fun.
He's 2 this month, and pretty verbal. I always say "use your words" or "can you tell me?" first, but if he doesn't quit, I lead him gently to our crying spot. I say "I can't understand you when you're crying. When you're done, we can talk". Then, we do.
Our crying spot is 2 twin-sized mattresses loaded with pillows and stuffed animals. It's not a dunce-cap on a stool in the corner.
I'm just of the mind that it's a tool they need to learn to use. It's okay to be upset; but it's not okay for everyone else to pay for it.
I am sometimes put off by the practice of labeling every feeling. It's kind of disrespectful to say "You're sad..." if maybe they're angry or just annoyed. How do I know what someone is feeling? I can ask..."are you sad?" but I see a lot of well-meaning teachers labeling feelings that might not be accurate.
I've also seen a lot of trainings that encourage punching a pillow, squeezing lemons, etc. I don't know that I even agree with most of those. First of all, a truly upset child rarely actually does those things. They generally WANT you to "pay" for their frustration, or sometimes bully you into giving in, and doing some socially-acceptable lemon squeezing isn't going to fluster you. Also, I wonder why we now almost teach children that they NEED to be angry about everything that doesn't go their way. Sure, there are times when we need to express that, and they're still learning. But sometimes it goes too far, IMO. Sometimes, they need to learn that it doesn't matter enough to get upset about. My little man here will literally cry over spilled milk. I don't empathize, I encourage him to get over it and clean it up.
By Tuesday, he generally goes to telling me, maybe a brief whine of frustration if he doesn't get the preferred answer. Most of the other kids rarely need the spot, and go there to read books instead.
I like these kinds of discussions. Still, this answer is probably excessively long..sorry.Comment
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