How close do you get with your dc families?

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  • Kindermom
    Daycare.com Member
    • Oct 2014
    • 40

    How close do you get with your dc families?

    I was just curious, and maybe it's different for everybody. How close do you get with your dc families? Do you do anything with them outside of business hours?
  • childcaremom
    Advanced Daycare.com Member
    • May 2013
    • 2955

    #2
    Short answer: not close and no.

    I did before and it was fine but now, I view them as my business clients and like to keep it that way. Much easier for me to be business-like.

    Comment

    • DaveA
      Daycare.com Member and Bladesmith
      • Jul 2014
      • 4245

      #3
      I don't get close & I NEVER mix business with personal anymore. Most of them are nice people but they are clients not friends.

      Comment

      • NightOwl
        Advanced Daycare.com Member
        • Mar 2014
        • 2722

        #4
        I should do what they ^^^^ do, but I'm too friendly. I make friends with the ones I really like and become way too attached to the children. One dcb left about two months ago and I think I was a little depressed for a couple of weeks. He was super special to me. I do NOT recommend it. You'll end up with hurt feelings and, occasionally, a broken heart.

        Comment

        • Thriftylady
          Daycare.com Member
          • Aug 2014
          • 5884

          #5
          Nope, clients only. Anything else confuses the business relationship. I still get attached to the kids, can't help it .

          Comment

          • Blackcat31
            • Oct 2010
            • 36124

            #6
            I have a VERY clear and separate line between my personal/private life and my business life.

            Most my clients are around the same age as my children so I don't socialize with them outside of daycare. When my children were younger, there were times in which they were invited to DCK's birthday party or invited a DCK to theirs but not very often enough that it was an issue or anything that caused the business relationship to be tested or strained.

            I make it VERY clear to my parents that while I am friendly by nature that they are first and foremost clients, even if they do become friends later.

            I am one of the few providers that has no issue taking friends, family and/or neighbors as clients because I have that clear boundary and have no issues reminding clients it's there nor enforcing rules/policies.

            My handbook states:

            "Because your child's welfare is so important, my closeness and nurturing of your child can create a sense of intimacy between us that makes our relationship feel more like a friendship rather than that of business partners.

            While this is ideal, well-defined boundaries are necessary and outlined within this handbook. These rules and policies are enforced regardless of the nature, status or feel of our relationship."

            Comment

            • MsLisa
              Daycare.com Member
              • Jun 2014
              • 288

              #7
              Only on a professional level. None of them know me outside of my classroom.

              There are parents who don't generally care for me (disrespectful), who pick up their kid and go without much word. Ironically their kid usually treats me the same way. Then there are the few who do stop and talk, they fill me in on stuff and are generally "good" parents. I appreciate those. But that's about it.

              Honestly, I discretely do more and am a lot nicer to the "nice parents" kids than I am for the ones that treat me like dirt.

              Comment

              • Baby Beluga
                Daycare.com Member
                • Aug 2014
                • 3891

                #8
                Originally posted by childcaremom
                Short answer: not close and no.

                I did before and it was fine but now, I view them as my business clients and like to keep it that way. Much easier for me to be business-like.

                Comment

                • Sunchimes
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Nov 2011
                  • 1847

                  #9
                  Way too close. I used to bond with the kids, but I was never more than business-like with parents. When the last 2 kids went off to school, it broke my heart. (The last one, mom, kid, and I stood in the hall crying the last day. Not fun.). I vowed that I would never love another deck. Then, I got this baby...

                  Now, I have special needs kids, and bonding with the parents is unavoidable. I am the link between the therapists and the parents. I am the one who teaches the parents what we are doing, and in some cases, I'm doing all of the therapy for the child. They tell me what they have noticed on the weekends, and I either address myself or contact the therapists for guidance. We are all on the same team.

                  Now, I have this micro-preemie about to embark on a custody fight. I will have to testify because I'be been there from the beginning. Again, way too close, but necessary to save this child. I'm losing sleep and having nightmares about what could happen. We discuss legal strategy.

                  On the positive side, we don't socialize-no parties or birthdays. I will confess to going to t-ball games and a dance recital, but they were after the child aged out.

                  Comment

                  • nanglgrl
                    Daycare.com Member
                    • Jul 2012
                    • 1700

                    #10
                    Approximately 3 feet give or take a couple of inches.

                    Comment

                    • Crazy8
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Jun 2011
                      • 2769

                      #11
                      Originally posted by childcaremom
                      Short answer: not close and no.

                      I did before and it was fine but now, I view them as my business clients and like to keep it that way. Much easier for me to be business-like.

                      This. The line was more blurred when my own kids were the same age as my daycare kids, we'd get invited to parties, etc. but now that mine are older it is business only and I much prefer it that way!

                      Comment

                      • Josiegirl
                        Daycare.com Member
                        • Jun 2013
                        • 10834

                        #12
                        There are a couple that I think would be a hoot to hang out with but that's about it. They're all nice people but I'm too old for them.

                        Comment

                        • jenboo
                          Daycare.com Member
                          • Aug 2013
                          • 3180

                          #13
                          I was very close to a few families and all business to others.
                          Two families I nannied for before I opened the daycare so hubby and I were close to them. One of those families threw the best parties.... I'll just leave it at that

                          Comment

                          • e.j.
                            Daycare.com Member
                            • Dec 2010
                            • 3738

                            #14
                            Originally posted by nanglgrl
                            Approximately 3 feet give or take a couple of inches.
                            :: I've always tried to keep things friendly but professional. I don't generally do things with my dc families outside of day care hours not because I don't like them but because I do and want to keep it that way!

                            Comment

                            • kendallina
                              Advanced Daycare.com Member
                              • Jul 2010
                              • 1660

                              #15
                              I'm currently friends with about 1/2 of my preschool families (friends prior to them coming here) and we get together, etc. I have a couple of families that have friended me on facebook, which is great, they're families that I get along with well, but I don't hang out with. I have some families that we keep it friendly-professional and that works for those families.

                              I've never had any problems with having clients as friends (I lay a very professional groundwork with families that starts at the tour and they clearly know what to expect from me) except when it comes to discussions about wanting to get pregnant next fall, because it means I will have to close/find a sub/something and we just live in too small of a town for that talk to be swirling around. If I do get pregnant, my friends will find out when the rest of my clients do.

                              Comment

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