Would You Discuss This With Parents?

[Kabob]

I make my toddlers sit correctly on their chairs no problem. Parents don't give their kids enough credit sometimes.

But anyway, I would have mentioned it in passing to the parents too just because older kids tend to tell their parents about their day and some kids tend to exaggerate. I also have some parents that panic about every little thing their child says or does. I just nip it in the bud.

I'd just keep following through with consequences. Hopefully, by telling dcm that it is a concern for safety reasons, she will back up your efforts.

[Blackcat31]

A majority of time kids do not have access to child sized chairs....other than school so realistically it isn't odd or unnatural that kids sit in them in ways we don't necessarily approve of...kwim?

What I would do is to continually remind AND role model how to sit in a chair the correct way. I wouldn't necessarily take the chair away from them as some of their actions are not intentional (I'll get to that..) and aren't something they consciously do.

I would set up some type of system such as the 1, 2, 3 method;

#1 "Johnny~ Please sit in the chair the right way. Thank you"

#2 "Johnny~ If you do not sit the right way, you will be asked to leave the table/chair/activity etc"

#3 "Johnny~ You need to leave the table/chair/activity. You are not sitting in your chair correctly and I've given you a reminder and a warning. You can try again later in the afternoon (or whenever appropriate)"

Rinse and repeat.

I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it and I wouldn't discuss this with the parents either as most have regular sized adult chairs at home and reinforcement of this behavior at home is usually not much help for several reasons.

This brings me back to my original point...... that during rapid spurts of brain growth rocking, leaning back in their chairs and any type of back and forth or swaying movement has a DIRECT correlation to this period of rapid brain growth/development (this is why rocking babies is so important ) and those of you who have spent time in classrooms (especially age 6-7 and again at 9-11) you will probably recall seeing almost an entire class of kids leaning back on two legs of their chairs while they work. Again it's both a conscious and unconscious behavior.

Personally I think expecting a child to sit in the chair correctly also requires the correct chair size. It's difficult to sit in a chair correctly if its not meant for you height/size. I am a shorter person and I can say that it's uncomfortable and sometimes painful to sit in a chair that is so big that my feet hardly touch the ground.

Anyways, I just wanted to toss that out there....

[Kabob]

A majority of time kids do not have access to child sized chairs....other than school so realistically it isn't odd or unnatural that kids sit in them in ways we don't necessarily approve of...kwim?

What I would do is to continually remind AND role model how to sit in a chair the correct way. I wouldn't necessarily take the chair away from them as some of their actions are not intentional (I'll get to that..) and aren't something they consciously do.

I would set up some type of system such as the 1, 2, 3 method;

#1 "Johnny~ Please sit in the chair the right way. Thank you"

#2 "Johnny~ If you do not sit the right way, you will be asked to leave the table/chair/activity etc"

#3 "Johnny~ You need to leave the table/chair/activity. You are not sitting in your chair correctly and I've given you a reminder and a warning. You can try again later in the afternoon (or whenever appropriate)"

Rinse and repeat.

I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it and I wouldn't discuss this with the parents either as most have regular sized adult chairs at home and reinforcement of this behavior at home is usually not much help for several reasons.

This brings me back to my original point...... that during rapid spurts of brain growth rocking, leaning back in their chairs and any type of back and forth or swaying movement has a DIRECT correlation to this period of rapid brain growth/development (this is why rocking babies is so important ) and those of you who have spent time in classrooms (especially age 6-7 and again at 9-11) you will probably recall seeing almost an entire class of kids leaning back on two legs of their chairs while they work. Again it's both a conscious and unconscious behavior.

Personally I think expecting a child to sit in the chair correctly also requires the correct chair size. It's difficult to sit in a chair correctly if its not meant for you height/size. I am a shorter person and I can say that it's uncomfortable and sometimes painful to sit in a chair that is so big that my feet hardly touch the ground.

Anyways, I just wanted to toss that out there....

I absolutely get this, but I thought the issue was them sitting goofy in child sized chairs and falling off the chair as a result. I didn't read the part about chair tipping. I fortunately don't have to worry about chair tipping at the moment.

And yeah, I totally was a chair tipper too...so I constantly needed reminders. Makes sense now that I think about it.. I was always tipping my chair when I wasn't consciously thinking about it and then someone would scold me.

I still think mentioning it to the parents is useful only because every time I corrected a behavior here that is totally normal for that age group (ie, taking toys), parents freak out and think their kid is a terror here or I'm a meanie if they find out from their child about it at home. I once had a parent think that their kid gave my baby stitches when they threw a toy since that is what the child told them and I didn't mention the toy throwing incident at pickup.

[Blackcat31]

I absolutely get this, but I thought the issue was them sitting goofy in child sized chairs and falling off the chair as a result. I didn't read the part about chair tipping. I fortunately don't have to worry about chair tipping at the moment.

And yeah, I totally was a chair tipper too...so I constantly needed reminders. Makes sense now that I think about it.. I was always tipping my chair when I wasn't consciously thinking about it and then someone would scold me.

I still think mentioning it to the parents is useful only because every time I corrected a behavior here that is totally normal for that age group (ie, taking toys), parents freak out and think their kid is a terror here or I'm a meanie if they find out from their child about it at home. I once had a parent think that their kid gave my baby stitches when they threw a toy since that is what the child told them and I didn't mention the toy throwing incident at pickup.

OP mentioned working on DCG's homework and her tipping the chair.

So today we are working on DCG's homework and she is in one of the child sized folding chairs and tipping back in it.

OP also does not mention if the chairs she is using for these kids are or aren't child sized and I guess it doesn't make a difference as my reference was about the type of chairs most kids have at home. Most families have regular sized dining room chairs or don't even bother eating at the table

Anyways, my point was that there IS a correct height for chairs based on each each person's height/size and using the correct chair for a persons height is ideal but not always doable....I think most of us have chairs that aren't exactly meant for specific sized children but instead just have either your standard sized chair for adults or the one-size-fits-all child sized chair...which isn't really a one-size fits all.

I also said I wouldn't mention it to the parents because I think this type of thing is like reminding kids to cover their mouths when they cough and I certainly don't bring that up in my daily report to parents about their child's day....kwim?

If it was a bigger deal to me, I would mention it for sure but since I don't feel parents can really do anything other than role model proper posture/sitting at home (which I hope they already do) there isn't much they can do to fix a problem or issue WE are having at OUR house on OUR watch.

[Kabob]

OP mentioned working on DCG's homework and her tipping the chair.



OP also does not mention if the chairs she is using for these kids are or aren't child sized and I guess it doesn't make a difference as my reference was about the type of chairs most kids have at home. Most families have regular sized dining room chairs or don't even bother eating at the table

Anyways, my point was that there IS a correct height for chairs based on each each person's height/size and using the correct chair for a persons height is ideal but not always doable....I think most of us have chairs that aren't exactly meant for specific sized children but instead just have either your standard sized chair for adults or the one-size-fits-all child sized chair...which isn't really a one-size fits all.

I also said I wouldn't mention it to the parents because I think this type of thing is like reminding kids to cover their mouths when they cough and I certainly don't bring that up in my daily report to parents about their child's day....kwim?

If it was a bigger deal to me, I would mention it for sure but since I don't feel parents can really do anything other than role model proper posture/sitting at home (which I hope they already do) there isn't much they can do to fix a problem or issue WE are having at OUR house on OUR watch.

I meant no offense. Just was saying I didn't read the part about chair tipping. I just read the part about sitting goofy. My kiddos sit goofy too since I know they don't have child sized chairs elsewhere too.

I did appreciate your perspective.

I don't mention chair issues to my families either. I correct them literally every day but have never mentioned it as it never has led to anyone getting hurt or breaking something. If I were taking away table privileges like OP is, then I would have to mention it just as a side comment or else my talkers would exaggerate and I'd get a phone call from overanxious parents. That's my problem, though and thus my perspective.

OP already talked to the dcm so I suppose it is pointless to worry about it.

I think I need more coffee....or less....I feel like I'm not making sense this morning and can't coherently form my thoughts today. Just trying to clarify my thoughts and failing miserably.

[Thriftylady]

OP here!

First thanks for all the advice. I have problems in both sizes of chairs, my dining room chairs are adult sized chairs. I am thinking of getting us a smaller table and a kids table to put in there IF my numbers pick up enough.

The chairs for doing homework and such are in a different room and are child sized chairs.

I am not finding the size of the chair makes any difference. Yes I have had some issues on the sofa (with them standing on it and climbing on it), but the sofa issues are not as often the chairs are every time they sit in them.

My main issue is that when they are messing around in the kitchen chairs, I can hear the chairs making noises, so I am afraid of breakage. The tipping of chairs, well I don't want them getting hurt. I just wish I could at least slow the issue down. Say we are in the kitchen for 20 minutes for a snack, I have to remind them each at least 10 times, to sit in the chair not sit on their knees, etc.