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What are your rules for the bigger kids regarding the babies? My baby is 7m.o. and my next youngest dck will be 2y.o. next month. All others are 3 or 4. I currently have 4 dcks (am interviewing for a fifth later this weekhappyface), and my baby and 3 y.o. My ds and 2 of my dcks are wonderful with the baby, but 2 of my dcks are CONSTANTLY in his face. I have to repeat, "Don't kiss the baby," "Don't touch the baby," "Leave the baby alone," "Let the baby play with that," all.day.long. They love him and want to cuddle him, but they are too rough and I really don't want anyone kissing his face on a good day, let alone when they're all coughing and hacking non-stop. They want to kiss his lips, pick him up, or take the toy he has always. The baby is very mobile, rolling around everywhere and trying to crawl so I really don't want to put him in a gated off area plus I don't have room for a play yard in the play room. I just feel so mean constantly saying, "Don't touch him." What rules do you have for this kind of thing?
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My rule:::
NO TOUCH MY BABY.
Ever.
Ever.
Babies rule. Period. If a baby crawls over and grabs a child or their toy, they are to be still and call for me. I will remove baby. Children are never to touch, push, grab, my babies.
They all learn it at an early age.
By about 16-18 months they know to stop, hold still and wait for me. Some providers or parents think I'm exaggerating my results or my practices, but I'm completely truthful.
In my childcare, I am the boss.
The kids behave. Everyone is gentle and loving 97% of the time. 3% of the time, they are unhappy because I don't bend rules. I demand happy behavior. If a child chooses not to be kind or gentle, they can remove themselves from group play.
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I tell them they may touch baby's legs and feet. That's it. He puts his hands in his mouth and so we don't want to get our germs in his hands and make him sick. Also no touching his face or head because he has a soft spot that if we touch it it can hurt him.
I don't completely make him off limits because then he is like forbidden fruit. They also know from day one there will be absolutely no picking him up. They can't pick up any child in daycare. That includes babies.
As far as giving baby the toy. I don't make them give up their toys. If baby wants something they have they can find something similar and offer it to baby. Baby doesn't get to just take toys because he's baby. Kwim. I know they don't understand it, but if I let it happen now, when is the age that it's not ok take toys.Comment
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Never never never touch babies. That's the rule.
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This makes me feel better. I was afraid I was being too harsh telling them to leave him alone. I do let them all come over & pat him gently & say hello when he wakes up for the day, but then I want them to go play & let him be. I didn't mean for it to sound like I let the baby take their toys. He's not allowed to take what they're playing with. My problem is they are always taking toys out of the baby's hands & I have to tell them to leave him alone & let him play. I really like the rule of only touching his legs & feet. I may use that one.Comment
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Don't touch baby. Don't touch baby's stuff. I repeat it over and over until everyone gets it.Comment
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I like the idea of letting everyone pat the baby and say hello. It takes the forbidden fruit idea away which can be tempting to little ones.Comment
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I'm saying this constantly here. Don't touch, don't touch, don't touch.... I have one who is particularly stubborn and tries to touch baby when her mom gets here, but I shut her down every time, mom present or not. And her mom totally backs me up.Comment
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What do you do when DCK's are siblings to the baby? I have a sibling group, DCB 5, DCG 3 and DCB 5 months. The older siblings are all over their baby bother. The 5 yr old is always trying to pick him up saying "I can hold him at home" DCP's dont seem concerned at pick up when the kids are all over the baby and in his face. I think they look at it as "loving" him. I tell them they can do whatever (hold,kiss, carry) him at home but not at my house. But I feel like I am denying them their brother?Comment
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I had the same situation with my dcf. 4yr 2yr and 6wks. I told them from the beginning they have to follow the same the rules as the other dck's. What they do at home is not my concern, but if they pick up or kiss and hurt the baby here, I will get in big trouble. I said at home she is your baby. But at daycare she is Jill's (not my real name) baby. And they are not to pick her up or kiss her or touch anywhere but her feet and legs. It only took a week or so but they eventually got it.Comment
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