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I have been dealing with this for quite some time now and have asked questions on here before about this problem. I have a DCG who will go long amounts of time (weeks) with no problems, and then, out of the blue, will be wet down to her socks. Once she wets herself, she usually continues off and on for a couple days, then back to being fine for weeks at a time. Sometimes I can't tell when she has gone because of what she is wearing. Sometimes she has dark leggings on with a dress or long top on. By the time I realize it sometimes, who knows how long she has been walking around wet. This causes problems for obvious reasons.......urine on carpet, furniture, toys, etc. I put her in a pull up for the rest of the day when she does this, but sometimes wonder if I should even "give her the chance" to pee her pants when she is not even going into the bathroom after wetting herself. Do I just keep her in a pullup all the time? I go back and forth with this considering that she stays dry for up to weeks at a time and then the cycle starts again. DCM has taken her to the doctor to see if there is any medical reason for this, and it has been confirmed by the doctor that this is a behavioral issue. I was pretty confident this wasn't a medical problem before her visit to the doctor, but mom wanted to rule out that option, which I agreed with. She goes to preschool two mornings a week and has never wet herself there. She only does this at home and here. Does anyone have any ideas as to why she might be doing this? DCM and I feel like we have gone through many different scenerios as to why she could be doing this and haven't figured it out yet. Starting to wonder if we will ever figure it out! She has been doing this now for about a year.
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Is it always the same time of day when it happens? Always when certain children are present, or after a "special" activity like a trip to the library or a visitor coming in? I'm sure you've thought of all that, but I'm just wondering if there's anything happening that makes her uncomfortable or if she's just being lazy about it. Sometimes going potty is more work than its worth to the little ones. I typically find that if you make peeing your pants more work than using the potty it seems to turn around. Obviously you don't want to scold her or cause her to feel shame, but can you have her clean up the mess? I would have her change her own clothes, put her own wet clothes into a bag to be taken home, and help you clean up the floor, chair, whatever she peed on. Since you're positive it's not a medical issue and she's so old, very honestly I'd be tempted to do a really fun activity she enjoyed while she's cleaning up. If she's missing out on something fun because of the accident it might encourage her to take the time to use the potty. Of course, if she doesn't have an accident the next couple days like she usually does, you could pull out the fun activity again so she understands that peeing her pants equals loss of privilege, while using the potty equates to fun. Just my thoughts. -
It's not uncommon for a child this age to get very busy, think they can hold, and then have an accident. When I have had kids do this, i just go back to prompting them to use the potty on a schedule - like set a timer and each time it goes off, just have a potty break. I'm sure she is embarrassed, and a pullup can be humiliating. IDK what testing the doctor has run - maybe just checked for a UTI - but it can be a sign of diabetes, constipation, or just a weak signal of "fullness" being sent to the brain.Comment
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I forgot to mention that on the mornings she is here instead of preschool, she is with only one year olds. My other two four year olds go to preschool opposite days of her. At first, I thought she was doing it because she was the only older child here on those days and was looking for more of my attention, but then it happened on a day when the other four year olds were here. There is no particular time of day that she does it. DCM and I decided that when she does it, that I would have her clean herself up and redress herself. We were hoping that having her do this would make her want to stop, but she has no problem doing this. She also doesn't care when I have her switch to a pull-up. We also have thought that she probably doesn't do it at preschool because she is with all kids her own age and would maybe feel embarrassed there. I have tried putting her back on a potty schedule. We did that for about a month with no issues. As soon as I backed off, it started again. How long do you suggest keeping her on a potty schedule? I had her going hourly. Obviously that worked because she was emptying her bladder very frequently,but not sure how long to continue before trying to ease up?Comment
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She'd be on a potty schedule until she aged out.Comment
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I have had this problem with two kids different times, too. I think they were embarrassed about wetting so they said or did nothing about it, leaving soggy footprints everywhere they went till I figured it out.
Both times, the parents were livid that I wanted them in a pull-up. One left me because of it. In both instances, the kids would have trouble in the mornings only because they were either loaded with juice and chocolate milk before they got here and/or they "didn't want to go potty when they woke up."
And I wanted the parents to step up and do their job, because I was going insane trying to incorporate 2 or 3 extra potty breaks in the mornings.
A potty break every hour will certainly keep your carpet dry, but I would go nuts, and DCG will never learn the art of "holding it," which is a necessary part of Kindergarten readiness. I can't wait to see what others suggest!Comment
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Pull up over underwear is my suggestion.Comment
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I would definitely discipline that is to old to be having accidents .There is no medical reason then no reason too pee in your pantsComment
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