What to Make of This

[Ariana]

I have a little boy who is 20 months old. He walks but is very unsteady. When he first came at 18 months he could barely climb up and down the stairs. When the dad was here for a visit he said that the child had never held a marker before and that it was the kids first time holding a balloon. He was a very honest dad which I appreciate. When he comes to my home he barely moves. He will basically play with the same thing over and over and over for hours on end. For example he will scoop snow out of the water bin with a spoon, stand up and let it plop back down over and over and over. He has zero language and he cannot follow directions. Mom says everything is perfect at home. He is just not communicating here apparently. The only way to describe him is that he is zoned out a lot. I know he goes to bed super late and he co sleeps, so maximum amount of sleep he is getting is 10 hours at night so could this be sleep related?

In my 10 years as an ECE I have never seen a toddler so lethargic before in my life. I mean most toddlers are just go go go but he is like a zombie most of the time. I don't know if this is a delay, maybe just super shy? Sleepy?

[Thriftylady]

Something sounds off to me. I would ask them to have him tested across the board. It isn't one thing, it is a list of things and to me that is a sign of something.

[Ariana]

This is how I feel too. Something is just "off".

[Heidi]

Maybe this would help open up a conversation:

http://ecdc.syr.edu/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Developmental_checklists_Updated2012.pdf

[Ariana]

I actually just brought this up with mom today. She assures me that he is meeting all of these milestones at home just not here. :confused:

[Unregistered]

I actually just brought this up with mom today. She assures me that he is meeting all of these milestones at home just not here. :confused:

I just don't think that's possible....

[Thriftylady]

I would really doubt that. Kids do act different at home vs. daycare, but not to that extreme when it comes to milestones.

[NeedaVaca]

Since you have only had him a couple of months I would monitor for another month or so and then ask for a meeting with both mom AND dad. Sounds like mom could be in denial and dad is a little more forthcoming. If you have specific examples of areas you think he is not meeting milestones and mom says he does then ask her to show you. If he won't communicate with you at all but mom says he does for her, great mom, please show me how you do this with him so I can replicate

[Pepperth]

He was a very honest dad which I appreciate.

Can you ask Dad if the toddler is meeting the milestones at home? You might get a different answer.

[Ariana]

I have a crazy mind boggling insane update! So I chatted with mom yesterday, as you know. Well today he comes in a completely different child. Like babbling, smiling, interacting, bringing me toys, squeeled and ran over when I took out the bubbles. It is insane how different he is today. Even my daughter is looking at him like who the eff is this guy?!! He is a lot more like what she was describing at home. Yesterday I was so concerned (hence my post) but today and the child I saw today is normal.

What do you make of that?? Mom said she put him to sleep earlier but that he took a while to fall asleep, so I am not sure putting him to bed earlier actually helped or what.

I am gobsmacked.

[daycare]

i have this child. the child is almost 3 and does not mutter a single word all day long. The child is happy, dances, plays alone only, but is very stoic.

The child has not passed any assessments or evals. Maybe I should not use the word PASS, but I think you know what I am saying.

the parents claim that the child is the exact opposite at home. I have tried and tired to have the parents take the child for further evaluation, but they refuse.

and so the mystery goes on....