Paying Daycare When You Are On Vacation

[MissAnn]

I have heard of it before. So it is not to strange. As a business owner I don't receive paid vacation. So I would have to say since she owners her own business I don't think she should. But I totally understand her getting a vacation, but I feel it shouldn't be paid. Because you will have to pay for a sitter during that time.

In my policies I say it is important to have backup care. I take holidays, 1 week paid vacation and one week unpaid. I also have 7 personal days....all paid. Parents get 1 vacation week they don't pay. I have to pay my own medical insurance.....going up to $1600/month. My rates are very low. I dont earn a huge profit. It doesn't matter to me if you get vacation pay from your job......I have a college degree and over 20 years experience and I've earned my unpaid time off. It's spelled out in my policies and if it's a deal breaker.....parents should look elsewhere. I have a waiting list.

[Unregistered]

What to do

So I’ve been paying my step-sister for over a year for watching my daughter. I work from 2pm to 11:30pm and sometimes even until 1:30am. My ex-husband works at the same company as I yet he works from 11pm until like 6:30am unless he works overtime too, I don’t know. Anyways I don’t really know anyone here where I live besides my family and all of my family works at the same place with the same hours as me minus my step-Mom and my step-sis. So my step-sis lives at my Dads house with him and her mom. My step-sis has a son that is a month older than my daughter. My dad lives about 10min away from me but they said that my daughter can just sleep there during the week so when I get off of work, I won’t have to wake her up to bring her home. So my step-sis is suppose to take her to school with her son; they go to the same school... they are 8 years old. Anyways I think my ex and I are being taken advantage of by her. We pay her every other week so one week I pay her 250 the following week my ex pays her 250 the next week I do. So she gets paid every week. When we first started having her watch our daughter we said she would get paid 200 then when last year summer hit she demanded more due to the kids being home all day and not in school and making excuses saying she needs more money and money to buy my daughter clothes and shampoo and food for the kids etc mind you she lives at home I’m not stupid my Dad pays for the food in their house and my daughter doesn’t go thru shampoo that much either and I can clearly buy my daughter the clothes she needs. Anyways so the prices goes up from 200 to 250... I know that’s pretty cheap compared to some people esp when my daughter even stays the night but mind you this is family I think I shouldn’t even have to be paying family! Anyways so here we are well over a year and yet I’m still paying her 250 when it isn’t even summer! And that’s because if I don’t my step sis is a huge bitch and will cause problems if she don’t get her way cuz she’s so spoiled it’s bs! Until last week I finally put my foot down and she had a job interview for two days so she didn’t pick my daughter up from school her mom did and then Thirs and Fri I didn’t go to work and had my daughter so I had to pay my step sis that week and paid her Thursday and I paid her 150 since she technically only had my daughter 3 days actually less... I sent her a note with the money thru PayPal explaining why and she lost it... “where is the other 100” “give me my money now” “you better hope I don’t see your hoe ass or I will beat you”... I never replied. She is older than me by 4 years mind you. It’s been a week and we still haven’t spoke. I told me ex what happened and he doesn’t care! I know anyone else would have told the babysitter they were fired and have not tolerated that. So I don’t want to pay her yet I have no choice because I have no one else to watch her yet my ex doesn’t work the same shift as me so we technically don’t even need a babysitter and on top of that he goes over to my Dads to spend time with our daughter for like 4 hours... so why do I need to pay my step-sis for when my daughters own Dad watches her? Or when half the time in the mornings my step-sis isn’t the one getting my daughter ready for school it’s my Dad that is and he even sometimes takes her to school! And my stupid ex pays my step-sis the same amount as me when he is over there... he’s paying her for him taking care of his daughter. I don’t get it and I don’t get why my ex can’t help me put her in her place and tell her when you don’t work you don’t get paid! My step mom was trying to compare to a daycare yet this isn’t a daycare and on top of that a daycare drug test (my step sis would fail that’s how she didn’t get that job a few weeks ago) and a daycare watches the kid and doesn’t throw the kid off on their Mom to go out and do whatever! Also when the daycares employees don’t show up for work guess what they don’t get paid! I’ve tried asking my step-Mom if I could just pay her instead since she has my daughter most of the time but she pretty much said no! Oh and Christmas time I had a week off of work so did my ex and so my daughter was over at his house the whole week with him and my step sis expected me to pay her... um no! You didn’t have my daughter at all, wtf! Soo... what would someone do in this type of situation?

[lblanke]

I would not let anyone watch my child who acted like that or who was on drugs. What are you thinking having her supervised by this person, especially since you said technically you do not need care. If you do not even need care, just adjust nap times and betimes so that you can pick up your own child after work and take her to school. It does not sound like you are getting quality child care. Why would you let someone who would fail a drug test be around your child, let alone be responsible for them???? I would not pay her to watch my child, nor would I let her do it for free.

[lblanke]

If your husband works at 11 PM, and you are not off until 11:30 (sometimes 1:30 AM), you do need someone to watch your child for that time when you are both working. Adjust your schedules and watch your own child or find other care arrangements. DO NOT LET SOMEONE WHO IS ON DRUGS SUPERVISE YOUR CHILD FOR ANY LENGTH OF TIME. Can you change your hours so that you can use the school before or aftercare program (most have them at reasonable rates)?

[Cat Herder]

Situations like this are why we don't recommend working with friends or family. Both sides expect special treatment. It leads to resentment.

"Soo... what would someone do in this type of situation?"

Find another provider and don't mix family and money in the future. Also, finding jobs more conducive to parenting would be a top priority.

Good luck! That sounds like a tough position to be in.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

So I’ve been paying my step-sister for over a year for watching my daughter. I work from 2pm to 11:30pm and sometimes even until 1:30am. My ex-husband works at the same company as I yet he works from 11pm until like 6:30am unless he works overtime too, I don’t know. Anyways I don’t really know anyone here where I live besides my family and all of my family works at the same place with the same hours as me minus my step-Mom and my step-sis. So my step-sis lives at my Dads house with him and her mom. My step-sis has a son that is a month older than my daughter. My dad lives about 10min away from me but they said that my daughter can just sleep there during the week so when I get off of work, I won’t have to wake her up to bring her home. So my step-sis is suppose to take her to school with her son; they go to the same school... they are 8 years old. Anyways I think my ex and I are being taken advantage of by her. We pay her every other week so one week I pay her 250 the following week my ex pays her 250 the next week I do. So she gets paid every week. When we first started having her watch our daughter we said she would get paid 200 then when last year summer hit she demanded more due to the kids being home all day and not in school and making excuses saying she needs more money and money to buy my daughter clothes and shampoo and food for the kids etc mind you she lives at home I’m not stupid my Dad pays for the food in their house and my daughter doesn’t go thru shampoo that much either and I can clearly buy my daughter the clothes she needs. Anyways so the prices goes up from 200 to 250... I know that’s pretty cheap compared to some people esp when my daughter even stays the night but mind you this is family I think I shouldn’t even have to be paying family! Anyways so here we are well over a year and yet I’m still paying her 250 when it isn’t even summer! And that’s because if I don’t my step sis is a huge bitch and will cause problems if she don’t get her way cuz she’s so spoiled it’s bs! Until last week I finally put my foot down and she had a job interview for two days so she didn’t pick my daughter up from school her mom did and then Thirs and Fri I didn’t go to work and had my daughter so I had to pay my step sis that week and paid her Thursday and I paid her 150 since she technically only had my daughter 3 days actually less... I sent her a note with the money thru PayPal explaining why and she lost it... “where is the other 100” “give me my money now” “you better hope I don’t see your hoe ass or I will beat you”... I never replied. She is older than me by 4 years mind you. It’s been a week and we still haven’t spoke. I told me ex what happened and he doesn’t care! I know anyone else would have told the babysitter they were fired and have not tolerated that. So I don’t want to pay her yet I have no choice because I have no one else to watch her yet my ex doesn’t work the same shift as me so we technically don’t even need a babysitter and on top of that he goes over to my Dads to spend time with our daughter for like 4 hours... so why do I need to pay my step-sis for when my daughters own Dad watches her? Or when half the time in the mornings my step-sis isn’t the one getting my daughter ready for school it’s my Dad that is and he even sometimes takes her to school! And my stupid ex pays my step-sis the same amount as me when he is over there... he’s paying her for him taking care of his daughter. I don’t get it and I don’t get why my ex can’t help me put her in her place and tell her when you don’t work you don’t get paid! My step mom was trying to compare to a daycare yet this isn’t a daycare and on top of that a daycare drug test (my step sis would fail that’s how she didn’t get that job a few weeks ago) and a daycare watches the kid and doesn’t throw the kid off on their Mom to go out and do whatever! Also when the daycares employees don’t show up for work guess what they don’t get paid! I’ve tried asking my step-Mom if I could just pay her instead since she has my daughter most of the time but she pretty much said no! Oh and Christmas time I had a week off of work so did my ex and so my daughter was over at his house the whole week with him and my step sis expected me to pay her... um no! You didn’t have my daughter at all, wtf! Soo... what would someone do in this type of situation?

If you want reliable care, then you pay someone to do , regardless of attendance. It doesn't matter if they're family or not. But you think you shouldn't even pay family. Even though they have your daughter at their house overnight, and what looks to be almost 24/7. Do you ever see your child? Personally, I think 250 is cheap. It sounds like you don't want to pay anything, yet you want someone to be available for long evening hours and overnights. You can give it a shot and go to a daycare center, but I'm sure they won't allow those hours, and anyone else besides family, you'll pay quite a bit more. But it might be worth it to keep family and business separate.

[amberrose3dg]

If you want reliable care, then you pay someone to do , regardless of attendance. It doesn't matter if they're family or not. But you think you shouldn't even pay family. Even though they have your daughter at their house overnight, and what looks to be almost 24/7. Do you ever see your child? Personally, I think 250 is cheap. It sounds like you don't want to pay anything, yet you want someone to be available for long evening hours and overnights. You can give it a shot and go to a daycare center, but I'm sure they won't allow those hours, and anyone else besides family, you'll pay quite a bit more. But it might be worth it to keep family and business separate.

If I was your step-sister I would politely tell you to go away. You sound entitled and think she owes you something. If you were paying someone else to watch her those amount of hours it be double that most likely. You could rearrange your schedule to work different shift. I can tell you also be required to pay for her "spot" even when she isn't there.