DCP Bringing In Mail

[laundrymom]

For the first time I my career I've had two seperate people bring my mail in. One mom has done it three times. The first time I thought the mail carrier had handed it to her on the way up the driveway, as he sometimes does if I'm out there.
But the second time I saw her reach in my box. She handed it to me as her daughter darted out the door and ran out to fetch her. The third time she handed it to me and smiled, like she'd done me a favor.

The second was a grandma picking up and she just handed it to me and went on like it was nothing. She's only picked up once in 4 years so I'm not as concerned but the other mom picks up every day.
I've been scrambling to get to it before she picks up.
I don't have anything to hide, I just think it's rude to grab another persons mail without permission.
Am I making too much of this? Or is it something I should address?
I was always told
"If it's not yours, don't touch it"
This went for mail, food, cars, etc.
Has the world changed so much that I should accept this?

[Shell]

Nope, I think you are right to be a little bothered. Isn't it a federal offense to grab someone else's mail?! Maybe you should cleverly let her know that, with a smile.
She probably thinks she's being nice- maybe her kid gets the mail at their house and the child wants to "help".
Do you have your own kids? You could say something like, "thanks for getting the mail, but my dd likes to do it, and it's her favorite part of the day!"
I have nothing to hide either, but it's a way for them to snoop into your business, and I wouldn't like it, even if they were trying to be helpful.

[Play Care]

That's weird.
I'm sure they think they are being nice, so that makes it harder.

I think I would maybe go the passive aggressive route to spare feelings *at first* something like: "Hey dcm, I appreciate you bringing my mail, but we just had some mail misplaced/lost, so I'm going to ask that you just leave it and we will do it.Thanks!" Or put it in a note to parents "Due to several instances of misplaced or lost mail, I ask that you not take mail out of the box, and not allow your children to do so either. I appreciate your cooperation in this matter."

Then if it happens again, you can take a firmer stance without looking like a "meanie" (not that I would care, but if you do, it may help )

[daycarediva]

Nope, I think you are right to be a little bothered. Isn't it a federal offense to grab someone else's mail?! Maybe you should cleverly let her know that, with a smile.
She probably thinks she's being nice- maybe her kid gets the mail at their house and the child wants to "help".
Do you have your own kids? You could say something like, "thanks for getting the mail, but my dd likes to do it, and it's her favorite part of the day!"
I have nothing to hide either, but it's a way for them to snoop into your business, and I wouldn't like it, even if they were trying to be helpful.

I would do the same. Thanks dcm but it's ds's chore. Then I made it ds's chore after school so that a dcd stopped getting my mail!

I don't have anything to hide either, but we do get a LOT of medical bills (dd- kidney disease, ds-autism) and dcd actually commented on it once snarky as in "Wow, is there something I need to know?!" and I felt the need to justify myself "No dcd, dd has a medical condition and ds has therapies related to his developmental disorder. They're expensive."

JERK. HAHA!

[finsup]

Yup, I would say the same about your DD. I've had parents bring me packages left by my garage which I'm fine with, by taking it from the mail box? No...that's a little too personal for me!

[Blackcat31]

For the first time I my career I've had two seperate people bring my mail in. One mom has done it three times. The first time I thought the mail carrier had handed it to her on the way up the driveway, as he sometimes does if I'm out there.
But the second time I saw her reach in my box. She handed it to me as her daughter darted out the door and ran out to fetch her. The third time she handed it to me and smiled, like she'd done me a favor.

The second was a grandma picking up and she just handed it to me and went on like it was nothing. She's only picked up once in 4 years so I'm not as concerned but the other mom picks up every day.
I've been scrambling to get to it before she picks up.
I don't have anything to hide, I just think it's rude to grab another persons mail without permission.
Am I making too much of this? Or is it something I should address?
I was always told
"If it's not yours, don't touch it"
This went for mail, food, cars, etc.
Has the world changed so much that I should accept this?

That would bother me.

I'd have to say something.

Maybe something like, "I know you are just trying to be helpful but I'd actually prefer to collect my mail myself. I am sure you understand." (then stand there and allow the awkward silence to happen....)

It IS helpful but not as helpful as it is annoying and annoying trumps helpful ALWAYS.

[Josiegirl]

My dcks love to grab the mail for me and when it's convenient/safe for them to do so, I let them. But I've never had a dcp bring it in? That is a little weird and personal for me too.

[kchlmom]

While it wouldnt bother me, I think she probably just sees at as being helpful. If you are busy with kids all day long, she probably figures you dont get the chance to grab it. If it bothers you just let her know.!

[deliberateliterate]

It wouldn't bother me, but I can understand how it could bother others. I like whom ever gave the idea of telling DCP that it's your son/daughter's job.

[Unregistered]

It wouldn't bother me I'd actually like it

[AslansG1rl]

It would irritate me. I like the idea of you giving that job to your child and letting the dcp know it is your childs chore.

[Play Care]

That would bother me.

I'd have to say something.

Maybe something like, "I know you are just trying to be helpful but I'd actually prefer to collect my mail myself. I am sure you understand." (then stand there and allow the awkward silence to happen....)

It IS helpful but not as helpful as it is annoying and annoying trumps helpful ALWAYS.

[Meeko]

While it may be nothing more than the dcp trying to help....it may also be the dcp's way of snooping into your private life.

Just by glancing quickly at your mail, they can see what medical bills you have and what clinics they come from, what credit card companies you have, what magazines you read, what hobbies you may have etc etc. They can also see when you may get a birthday card or letter from a relative that may have money in it. Outside in bright sunlight, they may easily be able to see inside the envelope too for even more details.

That probably makes me sound really paranoid, but the fact is we don't really know our clients. I prefer to keep my mail MY business. I don't want somebody else deciding they want a peek at my Social Security statement, or my personal info.

[Unregistered]

It would annoy me because so much of my home is crawling with daycare that it's important for my sanity to keep a few things sacred and separated. (I do understand and envy the obliviousness of not knowing what this is like.) I don't care when they carry in packages that are sitting on the porch, but actually getting into my mailbox crosses my refrigerator/pantry/laundry room boundary. Now, if they want to bring up the trash cans...

[daycare]

NO way.... I have so many mail issues It's not even funny. I have a war with my post office now as we speak..UGH

I would tell dcm. Hey sue, I know that you are trying to be helpful bringing in my mail, however, it looks like you have started a trend of everyone wanting to do it now too. So that I can be in control of my important mail, I have to ask that everyone to leave it be. Thanks for understanding and thank you for your kind gesture.