What Would You Do?

[DaycareMomma]

I have a dcg that has worn the same shirt for the past 3 days. It is so stained up and dirty its not even funny. The mother, well, we won't even go there and the dad doesn't even seem to care. Yesterday he joked "Oh I see you are wearing the same shirt as yesterday."

Seriously some parents need to have a permit to be allowed to reproduce!

[marniewon]

A long time ago, way before I got in the professional daycare, I babysat for a little boy who came in the same clothes day after day, not bathed, stinky, etc. I used to strip him down, bathe him and wash his clothes. More for me than for him or mom. I never got a thank you, not even sure mom even noticed . From what you are saying, I don't think those parents would notice or care either. Or worse, they'd expect you to do all of it all the time.

I don't have any advice, but I feel for you. It's hard to get close to, and love on, little ones who are filthy .

[nikia]

If it were me I would wash the shirt. I have given kids baths before because they were filthy in the morning when they came. I agree that you need a permit for everything else but any dipsh** can be a parent. Guess you can tell what kind of day I'm having. Lol.

[dEHmom]

Seriously some parents need to have a permit to be allowed to reproduce!

AGREE!!!!! there should be some sort of testing you have to do first, prove that you have good genetics too.

I would change his shirt.
Inform the parents, in a meeting or discussion away from the child so he/she doesn't hear, that it's a hygiene issue, and you cannot continue care if something is not done. Does it look like the kid has had a bath since?

[DaycareMomma]

AGREE!!!!! there should be some sort of testing you have to do first, prove that you have good genetics too.

I would change his shirt.
Inform the parents, in a meeting or discussion away from the child so he/she doesn't hear, that it's a hygiene issue, and you cannot continue care if something is not done. Does it look like the kid has had a bath since?

No it does not look like she's had a bath. Her hair is all tangled. I usually end up brushing her hair and putting it in a pony tail otherwise she's constantly trying to keep it out of her face.

This mother seriously needs parenting classes. The oldest daughter told me a few days ago that all 3 girls sleep in their mom's bed naked because thats how it goes in their house... I was appaled!

[nikia]

This flew up red flags for me about sleeping in bed naked. I don't the its appropriate at all and then dirty clothes no bath. Are they signs of other abuse? Sorry but red flags are flying up to me.

[dEHmom]

Definitely red flags!

I've read some awful true stories about stuff like this. Usually some sort of occult thing.

Not sure what they will tell you, but I'd call whatever the American version of Child and Family Services is. There's not much that will happen at this point, but it needs to be documented in a report. Mom doesn't have to find out. And YOU keep documentation of EVERYTHING! These kids trust you enough that you can get information of them. But talking to a social worker or case worker will let you know how to do it without overstepping your boundaries.

Look up Eddie Lee Sexton

I also read a book called Ghost Girl by I think Hayden? Very interesting book. Makes you wonder.

[SilverSabre25]

This flew up red flags for me about sleeping in bed naked. I don't the its appropriate at all and then dirty clothes no bath. Are they signs of other abuse? Sorry but red flags are flying up to me.

Sleeping in bed together wouldn't by itself concern me...but naked crosses a few lines, IMO. That couple with the lack of bath and the same (dirty) shirt...I don't know what I would do (CPS would cross my mind, though...depending on the rest of the situation).

When you first posted it I was wondering if perhaps it was a case of a young child INSISTING on the same shirt every day and the parents picking their battles somewhere else. If she was clean, the shirt was clean...I wouldn't think much of it. But that she's dirty, the shirt is dirty...hmm...

[dEHmom]

plus messy hair, etc.

And if you start doing the bathing and washing of clothes etc, you're going to find it is expected.
Or they may complain that you're undressing their kid or doing inappropriate things.

Ever heard the saying that the ones pointing the finger should often be pointing at themselves?

[nikia]

Sleeping in bed together wouldn't by itself concern me...but naked crosses a few lines, IMO. That couple with the lack of bath and the same (dirty) shirt...I don't know what I would do (CPS would cross my mind, though...depending on the rest of the situation).

When you first posted it I was wondering if perhaps it was a case of a young child INSISTING on the same shirt every day and the parents picking their battles somewhere else. If she was clean, the shirt was clean...I wouldn't think much of it. But that she's dirty, the shirt is dirty...hmm...

Yes its the naked thing that makes me feel weird about this. I would call my human service department if they investigate and everything is good then at least u know. You may lose a client but I would rather tick a parent off and lose some money than not call and have something be really going on.

[dEHmom]

Just wondering if there is any update regarding this post?

[lvt77]

this is neglect and you need to turn this parent in...