How Would You Handle This?

[holly333]

First of all, I just want to say how much I love this forum! It's been so helpful and I'm so thankful for all your great advice!

So I posted recently about a dcf that are both teachers and they didn't want to give me their holiday weeks schedule. First they told me that they'd just drop in when they felt like it and when I told them that wouldn't work so they said ok, we'll just bring him everyday. Well, shockingly the first day of break I get a text saying they were keeping him home. I told them that because of the last minute change, I had sent my son to camp when he could have stayed home and spent the time with me. Dad wrote back "if you don't want to get paid this week we can keep him all week". I told him that they needed to pay of course and that it being Monday they in fact needed to drop the check by even if their baby was not attending. I also told them again that I needed their schedule to attend. Dad then came over to drop the check off and wanted to talk, "clear the air" to which I said I couldn't as I had 5 children to watch. He kept talking, saying his son was sick (not mentioned previously) and they weren't breaking my policy on sticking to their schedule but admitted he didn't like it or think they should have to tell me. He wasn't yelling but was upset, and fairly combative-interrupting and not really listening to me. Later that day he texted saying they would keep the baby home the rest of the week.

Now usually this family is great-very nice, baby is a love and they usually pick up nice and early. I need to address his behavior to be sure he understands he cannot disrespect me like that or confront me to discuss issues while children are present and plan on sending an email. My question is whether that is enough? I'm somewhat worried about his attitude and acting like the "I'm the boss" parent and whether tension will remain and cause future issues. Thoughts? Any advice on how to word it?

[AuntTami]

So he is saying he doesn't think he should have to tell you ahead of time whether his child is coming or not? He just expects you to keep a spot open at all times and never know if the kid is coming? Or am I reading that wrong?

[holly333]

Yes, exactly. Despite me explaining how I need to plan our days/meals and most importantly whether my son can be home with me. He views it that i should just expect the child and if he doesn't come, it's a lighter workload for me.

[daycare]

Yes, exactly. Despite me explaining how I need to plan our days/meals and most importantly whether my son can be home with me. He views it that i should just expect the child and if he doesn't come, it's a lighter workload for me.

what does your contract/PHB state.

Example, mine states if your child will be absent for the day you must call in no later than 8am to report any absence for any reason.

It also states that payments are due in advance if your child is in attendance or not.

[Unregistered]

It's me, holly333...having trouble logging in.

My contract covers payment and I've now updated it to cover holiday schedules. I'm just feeling disrespected in that they tried to tell me they don't have to pay and show zero respect for my family time. I'm a small home daycare and even the dad says he considers me like family as I watch their son...but yet, he had no concern for my family time. Which he doesn't have to, but he does need to follow my rules for my business.

[daycare]

It's me, holly333...having trouble logging in.

My contract covers payment and I've now updated it to cover holiday schedules. I'm just feeling disrespected in that they tried to tell me they don't have to pay and show zero respect for my family time. I'm a small home daycare and even the dad says he considers me like family as I watch their son...but yet, he had no concern for my family time. Which he doesn't have to, but he does need to follow my rules for my business.

I am also a small business and I totally get what you are saying.

I tell parents this, here are our polices we enforce to all and services we provide to all. You need to make sure that they both work for you. If they don't I understand that it is nothing personal, we just are not a good fit.

It's hard to stand up to parents, but if you don't they just will come back to keep throwing rocks at you. I am sure that when everything is working in their favor you are the best thing on earth, but when it comes to them not getting their way, well you know what happens next.

I would be emailing this family and reminding them of YOUR policies, tell them that if it no longer works for them that you completely understand that it's nothing personal, but they will need to submit their notice of termination and then end by saying you will miss dck. The end..

I have had my fair share of those families in the past. BC-black cat gave me a lot of good insight by telling me what I needed to hear, not wanted to hear.

put your foot down, stand your ground and take charge.

Or lay down and continue to get walked on......

[Shell]

I just dealt with this, and termed. For me, the perfect parents started acting up a week or two before, so payment issues snowballed into a huge deal for me, and I had enough! Dcm confronted me via text- I can't imagine it happening in person. If I had wanted to keep them, my plan was to send a screen shot of the contract they signed that showed they pay when they are absent- regardless of the reason. Make sure you set them straight now, or they will always want special. For me, it wasn't worth the hassle.

[holly333]

Thanks so much! I just emailed mom (as I don't have dad's email)reiterating that my policies need to be respected and that while I would work with them to discuss misunderstandings, I would not debate my policies. Also that dad's comment was uncalled for and he was to wait to "discuss" until there are no children present. We will see what happens! They were the nicest people up until this and the baby is a sweet easy guy, what happened? Thank goodness for a wait list, at least i have options!