preschool and your own kid

[Unregistered]

My ds will be attending Kindergarten in the fall. We currently have him enrolled in a pricey and upscale pre-k program in our town. It is considered the best around, but I have found that it really isn't as great as people think it is. My child learns much more at home with me, and gets to socialize with the kids here; a couple are his age, the rest are a bit younger. We are considering pulling him from the school, as he doesn't really seem to be benefitting much from the experience. Also, I only have a few more months with him before he goes off to K. Is it selfish of me to pull him out of the program?

[Play Care]

My ds will be attending Kindergarten in the fall. We currently have him enrolled in a pricey and upscale pre-k program in our town. It is considered the best around, but I have found that it really isn't as great as people think it is. My child learns much more at home with me, and gets to socialize with the kids here; a couple are his age, the rest are a bit younger. We are considering pulling him from the school, as he doesn't really seem to be benefitting much from the experience. Also, I only have a few more months with him before he goes off to K. Is it selfish of me to pull him out of the program?

I don't think it's selfish, but I would point out there are other benefits to sending your child to preschool besides learning and socialization. I know my kids needed to have a little preschool before they went off to all day K. I needed to know they would separate well, and be able to handle being at school all day, etc. It was nice to have someone else running their show for a bit. They also loved having friends outside the day care and getting out of the house for a few hours. On a side note, some of my clients viewed my kids as part of the day care "package" and kind of needed to realize that they were not

That said, I loved our preschool experience. It was a traditional preschool with traditional preschool hours (ie: less than 3 hours a day a few days a week) it was not attached to a day care center, it was not all day (ie: glorified day care, IMO) and my kids LOVED it. I wanted them to have a "real" preschool experience - which is what we have. I would not even consider other programs that are all day, attached to day care, etc. as I refused to pay for what I believe is essentially day care.

I guess it comes down to, how does your child feel about school? Does he seem eager to go and see his friends and teachers? Does he like being away from the day care for a bit? Or is it the opposite? If he's not into it and it's more work to get him there, I would consider pulling.

[hope]

My DS is also going to kindergarten in the fall. I keep saying i will out him into preschool but cant bring myself to do it. He has learned a lot at home with me. I only wanted to send him so he would get a feel for a classroom. I may send a day or two a week a month before. I want to eat up every last minute i have with him.

[SquirrellyMama]

It isn't selfish at all. Take him out and spend the time with him. I might be biased though, since I homeschool

Kelly

[nanglgrl]

As much as I wanted to keep my son home with me this year and as much as I see they are doing the exact same things we do at my daycare he needed to go. He would beg to go grocery shopping with me, anything to get out of the house. He was by far my most difficult child, I think because our own children are usually most difficult but it also had to do with being it home and in daycare all day. He's doing great in preschool and I'm glad I decided to send him, that said he got into the free preschool at the elementary school. If I had to pay for it I might be a little more indecisive!

[DaveA]

Both of my kids went to pre-k the year before Kindergarten. Both times they had dcks in the same program but different classrooms. They enjoyed it. I liked having my kids in the pre-k for the same reason I never had them in the same center I worked in: it gave them more of a chance to learn without Dad there "just in case".

[finsup]

My ds will be attending Kindergarten in the fall. We currently have him enrolled in a pricey and upscale pre-k program in our town. It is considered the best around, but I have found that it really isn't as great as people think it is. My child learns much more at home with me, and gets to socialize with the kids here; a couple are his age, the rest are a bit younger. We are considering pulling him from the school, as he doesn't really seem to be benefitting much from the experience. Also, I only have a few more months with him before he goes off to K. Is it selfish of me to pull him out of the program?

I think that's a wonderful idea! I'm a big advocate for parents as teachers (and a homeschool mom so I feel pretty strongly about this!) It's not selfish at all to want to be with your child. He'll still be learning, he'll still be interacting with other kids, and most importantly, he'll get to be with you

[midaycare]

We moved around a bit when ds was younger and when we were in SC, we lived in an area where everyone sent their kids to preschool - starting at age 18 months. DS was 2.5 when we moved there. It was tuition based, but nothing crazy - $120 a month.

Then we moved to Iowa and Iowa has free preschool for 4-year-olds (at least they did when I lived there a few years ago). So ds went because, well, every kid did. Just half day preschool.

Then we moved back to MI and he was a little young for kindergarten so we did Young 5's, but it was an all day program.

So he's in first grade now, but has been in school since age 2.5. He's had a lot of different experiences and he has loved them all. They have made him very social and able to make friends easily.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I think that's a wonderful idea! I'm a big advocate for parents as teachers (and a homeschool mom so I feel pretty strongly about this!) It's not selfish at all to want to be with your child. He'll still be learning, he'll still be interacting with other kids, and most importantly, he'll get to be with you

I agree with all of this.

[Annalee]

I kept both my sons in my home child care right up till they started Kindergarten...even kept them an extra yr because their birthdays were august and september and I didn't want them to begin school at the age of 4 even though they made the cutoff....so they were going on 6 when they actually started kindergarten and there were no separation issue......am so thankful I kept them home the extra year....they are now in 5th and 7th grade....

[itlw8]

do you attend church and does it have a Sunday School program ??? If so that is a great solution for children to learn to listen to another adult before school starts. My grandson has been in my preschool but will attend the summer school program before kindergarten for just that reason. He Needs to listen to others

[kendallina]

As long as you're not worried about separation problems or whether he will listen to another adult, I'd definitely take him out. I kept my daughter in my in-home preschool and she started all day kindergarten this year, and she's fine. Enjoy your time with him now, I'm completely missing our long days together (well, sometimes ).

[Unregistered]

It seems wasteful to be spending money for a pricey preschool when you don't find that there is any specific benefit for your family. If he really doesnt care, I would pull him out. If he absolutely loves it or if he honestly does need the transition towards kinder, I would keep him. It is up to you to really weigh what he needs and make the decision. For me, we have found preschool to be best for our family. My firstborn is very bright/gifted and needed the challenge of preK (where she was put in a multi age classroom.....learning cursive at 4 years old!). My second was special needs and she absolutely needed the specialized program at 4 years old we put her in for social issues. My third would be fine without preschool but I find that generally, it has been a benefit for her. She is 3.5 but incredibly small for her age. I needed help getting her adjusted to a classroom where she needed to figure out how to find her way with a group and with big kids and without mom. So again, her need was more of a social need at this point. My fourth may not need preschool. He is just 2 and seems to get along well with others and very cooperative by nature and independent. We just make the decision based on each child and each individual program plus our budget at the time. In general, I find preschool for children under 4 to be mostly unnecessary. At 4, I would decide on a kid-by-kid basis.

[sally]

My older daughter went to daycare full time and went to 3 yr old preschool 2 days per week from 8-11 am, then the next year 4 year old preschool 4 days per week from 8-11am. She was well prepared for school when she went to kindergarten. My youngest is 2 and stays home with me but will be doing 3 year old preschool and 4 year old preschool.

[Unregistered]

I don't think it's selfish, but I would point out there are other benefits to sending your child to preschool besides learning and socialization. I know my kids needed to have a little preschool before they went off to all day K. I needed to know they would separate well, and be able to handle being at school all day, etc. It was nice to have someone else running their show for a bit. They also loved having friends outside the day care and getting out of the house for a few hours. On a side note, some of my clients viewed my kids as part of the day care "package" and kind of needed to realize that they were not

That said, I loved our preschool experience. It was a traditional preschool with traditional preschool hours (ie: less than 3 hours a day a few days a week) it was not attached to a day care center, it was not all day (ie: glorified day care, IMO) and my kids LOVED it. I wanted them to have a "real" preschool experience - which is what we have. I would not even consider other programs that are all day, attached to day care, etc. as I refused to pay for what I believe is essentially day care.

I guess it comes down to, how does your child feel about school? Does he seem eager to go and see his friends and teachers? Does he like being away from the day care for a bit? Or is it the opposite? If he's not into it and it's more work to get him there, I would consider pulling.

As a former teacher, I feel the opposite. I wouldn't pull a child who is having a hard time or because they miss being around daycare kids. Soon, your child be in full time school. Once they're in kinder, you can't just pull them because you miss them or they don't "like" school/miss other students. Unless you plan on homeschooling...

I know to some this might seem extreme, but I had one little boy who's mom didn't work. I had a four year old preschool class in a public school. She would take him out for any reason. He had a real ruling the roost problem. If the day didn't go his way, i.e. I didn't let him bully the other kids or me, he wouldn't come in the next day and sometimes the day after. He'd also miss WHOLE weeks, because the mom wouldn't bring him in if it wasn't a whole week. Like for for Thanksgiving or Christmas. He really lost it in kinder when mommy couldn't take him home early or keep him home, because kinder is required where I live and because she finally found a job.