Parents Who Will Not Accept The Answer

[BumbleBee]

Either DCM agrees to your policies or she finds other care.

Either allow DCG to walk (as is on ALL days) or she finds other care. I would NOT agree to gma picking up and dropping off because that kind of thing leads to other issues...gma is late/early...you were late/early....gma can pick up all days but this one and now dcg doesn't have walking gear because she though gma was coming and she wouldn't need it....etc etc...

It just seems it may create even more issues.

and the real issue is that dcg isn't dressed for the weather

YUP! Also I think dcm still has that 'bully' mentality (she was a major bully in high school. In fact, one of her former victims is another dcm here.)

Holey moley, dcg is almost 9! What about personal responsibility & logical consequences? This goes for dcm, too! I am speechless!

Yes, a thousand times yes!

I'd term, because I can see where this is going. If gma is picking up from school. She picks her up before mom does for home, she's probably able to watch her after school. It's going to end up with the girl being in gma's care. I'd term now if you didn't need the money. If you need the money, I'd find a replacement and term. This girl is not going to be in your center much longer.

It's definitely not a money thing since it's only after school care. I wouldn't be heart broken if she leaves, tbh.

But Grandma picking her up and bringing her there, undermines your authority and validates that there is something wrong with your policy.

Completely agree with this.

I have a lot of patience but not when it comes to revisiting the same issue over and over with the same parent.

Me too. At this point I am done visiting the issue. One last written explanation outlining what we do and how things will go this winter. Also outlined will be the consequences (not really the word I'm looking for) of continuing to bring it up. Next time it comes up will be a warning, if it comes up again after that, termination. Also in the letter will be what will happen if the child does not have appropriate gear (not allowed at daycare) and payment will still be required for that day (because I am holding the spot.)

Thank you to everyone who responded. Sometimes I need validation that I'm not being a big ole meanie. I get a little hot under the collar sometimes and need other perspectives.

[CraftyMom]

I agree with everyone, mom is trying to avoid following your policy by creating a "solution" for herself, when the reality is she is completely not following your policy by doing so.

I also agree, dcg should go to gma's after school. Mom may not like it, but dcg is 9, she doesn't need to be in daycare

I don't know why some things push my buttons while other things aren't a big deal. This would push my buttons!

What about going outside? Or do the kids always stay in after school. Here they would be required to have the proper gear ANYWAY for afternoon playtime. Nevermind when they KNOW she will be walking home from school everyday.

Another thing, let's say mom leaves it up to dcg to remember her stuff in the morning, you get there (walking) and find out she is not prepared. What exactly does she expect you to do? Walk all the way back home and get your car, then go all the way back for dcg? Really? I know you do not transport so it's not even an option, but is this what she is expecting?

[BumbleBee]

I agree with everyone, mom is trying to avoid following your policy by creating a "solution" for herself, when the reality is she is completely not following your policy by doing so.

I also agree, dcg should go to gma's after school. Mom may not like it, but dcg is 9, she doesn't need to be in daycare

I don't know why some things push my buttons while other things aren't a big deal. This would push my buttons!

What about going outside? Or do the kids always stay in after school. Here they would be required to have the proper gear ANYWAY for afternoon playtime. Nevermind when they KNOW she will be walking home from school everyday.

Another thing, let's say mom leaves it up to dcg to remember her stuff in the morning, you get there (walking) and find out she is not prepared. What exactly does she expect you to do? Walk all the way back home and get your car, then go all the way back for dcg? Really? I know you do not transport so it's not even an option, but is this what she is expecting?

I completely agree with the not following my policy and pushing my buttons. I'm like you, some things don't bother me while others make me

We do go out in the afternoon. Generally around 4:30 until pick up. Mom is expecting me to bend. She wants special and I won't give it. She's like a toddler who has been told no but keeps testing the boundary. I don't think it has anything to do with walking home, and everything to do with mom being told no.

[BumbleBee]

The more I'm thinking about this, the more I can see dcm claiming her child cannot be outside in cold weather due to a health condition. This MAY be legitimate though the child goes outside twice a day at school sooo....

Anyways, I know some people have a health form that the doctor fills out. Would anybody be willing to point me in the right direction on where I can find one of those?

Thanks!

[Blackcat31]

The more I'm thinking about this, the more I can see dcm claiming her child cannot be outside in cold weather due to a health condition. This MAY be legitimate though the child goes outside twice a day at school sooo....

Anyways, I know some people have a health form that the doctor fills out. Would anybody be willing to point me in the right direction on where I can find one of those?

Thanks!

Here is mine: https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B8_...ew?usp=sharing

But mine if more for when a child is ill/sick not a medical condition such as asthma...

Still DCM knew of your policy on walking to and from school BEFORE enrolling so if her child does have a medical condition that dictates she cannot be outside in cold weather, she had NO business enrolling her in a care program then that walked to and from school outside everyday.

Plus, I can't say I've ever heard of an asthmatic child not being allowed outside in certain weather. I know you have to watch for signs of distress while outside and that cold weather can aggravate a respiratory condition but not that they literally can't be outside to walk 4 blocks.

I think this mom is trying to simply trying to run the show her way.

[BumbleBee]

Here is mine: https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B8_...ew?usp=sharing

But mine if more for when a child is ill/sick not a medical condition such as asthma...

Still DCM knew of your policy on walking to and from school BEFORE enrolling so if her child does have a medical condition that dictates she cannot be outside in cold weather, she had NO business enrolling her in a care program then that walked to and from school outside everyday.

Plus, I can't say I've ever heard of an asthmatic child not being allowed outside in certain weather. I know you have to watch for signs of distress while outside and that cold weather can aggravate a respiratory condition but not that they literally can't be outside to walk 4 blocks.

I think this mom is trying to simply trying to run the show her way.

Oh I completely agree with you that she's trying to run the show her way. I'm letting her dig herself a big ole hole on this one. She's doing a darn good job of it too.

Thanks for the form, I appreciate it.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I sat here drinking my coffee shaking my head and thinking, "What a toot!" The mom...not the little girl. She is a total product of her environment. Her environment should deal with the "consequences" if they don't want her walking.

Part of me wants you to tell her, "Don't worry, Sue. I have an Ergo carrier to strap her to my back should both her and yourself forget to put appropriate footgear on her. Then her feet won't have to touch the cold ground."

[ColorfulSunburst]

Bellow is a part of my letter to parents of a 3 y.o. boy

"I also would like to ask you to contact me via my cell phone only in case as emergency or if you need to inform me about something. Remember, if you hear nothing from me during the day it means that your son is OK."

I have wrote that because the mom sent me an SMS with a question "how is my baby doing?" at least twice per a week. I didn't answer but she continues try :confused:

Enjoy her respond: "As his mom I miss him dearly & sometimes will check in." My reaction ::::::

OK, not a big deal, you know I will not answer.

[Laurel]

I sat here drinking my coffee shaking my head and thinking, "What a toot!" The mom...not the little girl. She is a total product of her environment. Her environment should deal with the "consequences" if they don't want her walking.

Part of me wants you to tell her, "Don't worry, Sue. I have an Ergo carrier to strap her to my back should both her and yourself forget to put appropriate footgear on her. Then her feet won't have to touch the cold ground."

::::::

[BumbleBee]

Had to come back to this and give an update because it made me laugh.

Dcm grudgingly zipped it about the walking home when she realized I wasn't going to budge. Dcg still complains regularly but I just ignore it. I didn't implement the policy about no gear no walk but it's written up if I need it.

The best part is 2 weeks ago when dcm called to ask me if dcg could walk with us from school to the corner & then she could walk the last 2 blocks to gma's house. ::

Too cold to walk to daycare, but ok to walk to gma's that is 2 blocks more.

It's a win win for me. I'm charging her for the time I have to supervise dcg (when she's walking with us) and it opened up another after school spot for me.

Made her sign a new contract with the new 'hours' and everything. She signed it, gave it back, then this past week she panicky called me to ask if I would have room for her dd if gma wasn't home after school.

Nope, sorry. Spot is filled. Enjoy that bed you made. Hope it's comfy.

[CraftyMom]

:: I love it!

So is she wanting you to keep the spot open just in case on a daily basis?

Well if gma knows dcg is coming she should be home, not your problem.

[spinnymarie]

Haha, thanks for the update! Mom kind of shot herself in the foot there, eh?