I really need some ideas on what to do with one of my dcg who obsessively follows around my other dcg ALL day long!! One is a carefree 23 month old, the other is a total follower, taking away toys, pushing, hitting, antagonizing 20 month old. I am at my wits end at how to make this little one leave the other child alone. She absolutely has to have everything the other girl is playing with, follows her around constantly, repeats the same things as the other child says them....on and on. She is def a shadower. It's a problem because the other little girl gets highly aggravated at times, especially over toys when she just comes over and snatches them from her. I will take her and move her completely away and give her own toys, but that leads to a full all out through herself in the floor and kick and scream tantrum. What else to do??
Tricks for OBSESSIVE follower
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I really need some ideas on what to do with one of my dcg who obsessively follows around my other dcg ALL day long!! One is a carefree 23 month old, the other is a total follower, taking away toys, pushing, hitting, antagonizing 20 month old. I am at my wits end at how to make this little one leave the other child alone. She absolutely has to have everything the other girl is playing with, follows her around constantly, repeats the same things as the other child says them....on and on. She is def a shadower. It's a problem because the other little girl gets highly aggravated at times, especially over toys when she just comes over and snatches them from her. I will take her and move her completely away and give her own toys, but that leads to a full all out through herself in the floor and kick and scream tantrum. What else to do??
In my experience, the tantrums eventually get better if you redirect them to their spot and ignore the fussing.- Flag
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I have a similar problem, though now they are both 31 months.
I think you (I) I have to do just as much teaching with the 'leader' as with the follower, since both need to learn to respect others. But for now I just wait until there's an issue and remove the 'follower' to a new area to play something else.
I think if you stick with that, what you've been doing, she will get it. Tantrums get taken to the tantrum chair, here, until they are done.- Flag
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Teach the older child how to say and sign stop and if that doesn't work, maybe you could section off an area with toys or towels and teach the younger child not to cross that boundary. Eventually after repeatedly putting them back in their area (I say "sit and play" and put them back in their area) after they cross that boundary, they will get it. They can earn back the ability to play in the older child's area after they learn to listen and be gentle. Totally normal to want to follow and take the cool toys, but it's not okay to hit and such...
In my experience, the tantrums eventually get better if you redirect them to their spot and ignore the fussing. :)
She may not like it, but what you are doing is working. Don't give up!- Flag
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