Tantrums - How To Handle & When To Call Parents

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  • Stephnrich
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jul 2014
    • 95

    Tantrums - How To Handle & When To Call Parents

    Without too many details, how long do most of you allow a three year old to have a crying/screaming tantrum before you've had it and call parents? Tips to handle this type of behavior? I've been very lucky in the last six years to not have an exceptionally hard to handle child as far as tantrums...until recently. Thanks for any help you have!
  • Controlled Chaos
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jun 2014
    • 2108

    #2
    I don't call parents unless property in being damaged or other children endangered. I have a 3 yo who will scream and cry for 10 min (in our "safe corner") when he first started his tantrums would last the better part of an hour but boy did he nap well it took 3 months to get him over the idea that screaming = winning

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    • Second Home
      Daycare.com Member
      • Jan 2014
      • 1567

      #3
      I have had tantrums that lasted 30 minutes maybe even longer . As long as they are not hurting themselves or anyone else I let them scream , in another room away from the rest of the kids .

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      • Rockgirl
        Daycare.com Member
        • May 2013
        • 2204

        #4
        I've only called one parent, and it was because her child was banging his head on the wall and floor during a tantrum. Otherwise, I do as others have said and let them scream in a safe place.

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        • Littlehouse-Lotsofkids
          Daycare.com Member
          • Nov 2014
          • 14

          #5
          I have a two year old who regularly had screaming tantrum that lasted between 40 minutes to an hour and 40 minutes. She would not stay in a spot I put her. She would follow me, inconsolable and angry although she was not violent or destructive. I put up with it because she is also my niece and there was extenuating circumstances where we believed them to be linked to her epilepsy.

          But it was awful while it lasted.

          With other children I usually give it an hour and a transition -usually to outside, if it doesn't get better I call home.

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          • Indianadaycare
            Daycare.com Member
            • Feb 2014
            • 125

            #6
            I would let them cry, but in a safe place away from everyone. I have a pack n play set up in an adjoining room that does not get used for daycare. I have the lights on and put one toy in there with him/her and tell her when she is done screaming, I will come get her. A three year old is not too old for that IMO. Sometimes it's lasted an hour! Awful. Maybe wear some ear plugs to help (assuming you can still hear/take care of kids)
            "Be careful what you teach. It might interfere with what they are learning."
            -Magda Gerber

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            • Unregistered

              #7
              I don't call. I feel like that is their goal, to go home.

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              • KiddieCahoots
                FCC Educator
                • Mar 2014
                • 1349

                #8
                Don't know if this relates to your dcc, but this is my recent tantrum situation and how I've handled it......
                My little guy has tantrums because they work for him at home, so he tests the waters with them here.
                With that said, I've informed dcm that if dcb has tantrums here again that last an hour or longer (my personal limit), then I will be calling her for pick up, and amazingly the tantrums have been less

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                • Heidi
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Sep 2011
                  • 7121

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Controlled Chaos
                  I don't call parents unless property in being damaged or other children endangered. I have a 3 yo who will scream and cry for 10 min (in our "safe corner") when he first started his tantrums would last the better part of an hour but boy did he nap well it took 3 months to get him over the idea that screaming = winning

                  Comment

                  • Stephnrich
                    Daycare.com Member
                    • Jul 2014
                    • 95

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Second Home
                    I have had tantrums that lasted 30 minutes maybe even longer . As long as they are not hurting themselves or anyone else I let them scream , in another room away from the rest of the kids .
                    I wish I could put the child with the tantrum in another room, but I'm unable to do that for supervision reasons. I do put him in what I tell him is calm down spot, but unfortunately that's just a corner in whatever room me and the other children are in. Love the idea of earplugs, , but then again there are ten other children I need to hear (and they'd want earplugs, too!). This child is 3 and has screaming/crying tantrums that have been lasting up to two hours, with a little break in between. After his initial tantrum is over, he's done for the day, but this is getting old quickly. He's not very verbal and I can barely understand what he does say, so I know that has a lot to do with it.

                    I'm agreeing with the one hour limit and then calling parents.

                    Comment

                    • kitykids3
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Jan 2012
                      • 581

                      #11
                      I usually give it an hour if it has been non stop. I've only gotten to that point 1 time, but have had plenty that will last at least 30 min. I put them as far away from us, but where I can still see them. I tell them when they are done, they can come talk to me and then I ignore the tantrum. It's in my policies that I will give one hour of that type of behavior before calling to pick up, but it would have to be very disruptive, defiant behavior for me to call. I don't want the kids to learn that if they act like that they get to go home.
                      lovethis daymommy to 7 kiddos - 5 girls and 2 boys

                      Comment

                      • Josiegirl
                        Daycare.com Member
                        • Jun 2013
                        • 10834

                        #12
                        Would teaching this child deep breathing do any good? Or what about giving him a calm-down bottle? The ones that slowly drip down the sides, with big glitter inside? My kids are quite enthralled with them. Trouble is if he cannot calm down at all, he might not even care.

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