Family dynamics changing?

[drseuss]

I am curious to know what other providers see or perceive to be happening in their areas regarding family dynamics, scheduling, living arrangements etc.

The posts about providers with one or two spots they have a hard time filling got me thinking about this.

Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free?

Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts?

Are you seeing more multi-generational households?

Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations?

Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally?

Just food for thought and discussion.

[Blackcat31]

Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free?

Not in my recent experience. I think it also has a lot to do with what kind of clients I choose to take.

In the past 7-10 years I have purposely passed on families I KNOW don't fit well with my program, my philosophies and beliefs.

A majority of families in my care are similar to my home life.

So, I don't know much about families that aren't like that. kwim?

Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts?

Nope, again not here so much. All but one of my DC families are dual parent families. Both parents work regular 9-5 type hours.

Are you seeing more multi-generational households?

IMHO, this has changed but not MORE...I think it's actually less as more older people are staying in the work force longer. Many of my families do not have grandparents that aren't working so grandma days don't happen often with the clients I have now as grandma and grandpa are still employed themselves.

Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations?

YES. I feel this generation of parents don't know how to parent. They are too worried about being judged by others since we have become a society that measures our self worth by what others post in response. (generally speaking)

Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally?

Absolutely. Just like common daycare practices vary from area to area, I believe families and family dynamics vary just as much.

[Cat Herder]

1. Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free?

No. It is still culturally accepted to have your kids by 25, here. People start panicking if they are close to 30 without kids. Southern Culture.

2. Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts?

No. Most kids are in care 9-12 hours a day. Yes, Most.

3. Are you seeing more multi-generational households?

No. The opposite. Many young parents resist the influence of their parents on their own kids. "They" (the specific families I have worked with in the past) choose subsidy over family. . I think it is because there is less personal accountability that way. Longer hours, no expectations from them, they don't pay but still demand special as if they do. Many were subsidy kids themselves. My view may be skewed as I am often politically incorrect. That is why I push Grandparent days, gifts and visits. It benefits the kids.

4. Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations?

My style of parenting or theirs? It is complicated because these adult kids were raised in daycare, too. Graduate, get married, have baby, send to daycare, send to school, marry them off, wait for grand kids to enjoy. That seems to be the pattern. Survive raising kids for the reward of enjoying your grand kids (with many GP's over stepping boundaries to "make up" for what they missed with their own kids)... it is maddening. The culture took a hard u-turn somewhere, maybe it will shift back.

5. Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally?

Abso-stinking-lutely. At least I hope so. I have this dream that life makes sense where education is more readily available to the masses. If it does not exist, don't tell me. Let me dream.

6. Just food for thought and discussion.

Thank you!!! I love these threads. I want to understand other people. My little community is full of other people like me. It is hard to see other viewpoints or learn other ways of being when everyone around you is just like you. The scenery is amazing and I can afford to live here, though... ::::

[BrooklynM]

Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free?
Yes, I personally see this a lot. All of my parents were over 30 before having their first child. I've got a couple of them thinking about only having 1 child. I have several friends that have decided not to have kids which I am in full support of their decision for them. By all means we have too many parents that never wanted to be parents!

Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts? Not really but most of them have 1 parent that drops off and 1 that will pick up.

Are you seeing more multi-generational households? Not within the parents of my daycare, but yes in general.

Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations? Less equipped. They were raised by pretty much the first generation that both parents worked and they probably felt like a latch key kid and so they want to spoil their own kids so that they don't feel deprived like they were.

Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally? YES! I live in California and it is so diverse. When we go back to the midwest where my husband is from I find that there are more stay at home moms.

[Angelsj]

Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free? Not here. We still have a larger families (four or more kids) and they are still being born to young parents, at least at the beginning.

Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts?
I actually see a lot of this, as it is often the group to whom I cater. Many of my kids are here for the 3-4 hours that they parent schedules overlap.

Are you seeing more multi-generational households?
Not among those who have been here for a while, but we have a lot of local new immigrants, both Mexican and Somali. Those families very often have grandparents living with them and helping with the childcare.

Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations?
Much less so, again, except for the first generation immigrants. Children who have grown up in the daycare arena themselves have a very hands off approach to child care. They often truly believe that their child's education is the job of day care, then school, with no personal responsibility at all on the part of the parent.

Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally?
Absolutely. I have lived in many places over the years, and they vary a great deal, often even in two towns fairly near each other.

Just food for thought and discussion.

Answers in bold.

[deliberateliterate]

In my area, the majority of people I see and chat with at the park are grandparents. Some are f/t caregivers, who come in from out of town every day, and some do it part time because one parents works either part time or shifts.

[Annalee]

I am curious to know what other providers see or perceive to be happening in their areas regarding family dynamics, scheduling, living arrangements etc.

The posts about providers with one or two spots they have a hard time filling got me thinking about this.

Do you see couples waiting to have children, having fewer children, or choosing to remain child-free? I think the children are still out there somewhere!

Among young families, are you seeing a trend back toward one parent staying home with the children, or parents working opposite shifts?What I see alot of is children being left with older siblings that are around 13 yrs of age which I find unsettling....or children being left in unregulated care, legally and illegally! Many parents are working the 3 twelve-hour shifts in this area....

Are you seeing more multi-generational households? Yes, and it seems everyone is doing some kind of job now just to make ends meet...

Regarding actual parenting, do you feel that the generation starting families now is more or less equipped to handle parenting than previous generations? If you read Psychology TODAY, it says we have raised a nation of wimps who cannot even negotiate a salary for a job without their parents being with them, so I feel these persons are, in NO WAY, able to raise kids! ::

Do you think some of these dynamics differ regionally?Yes, every part of the nation is different, but I think the "it's about me, me and me" thinking is everywhere and I don't see it changing soon!

Just food for thought and discussion.

Answers in bold!