Special Needs-behaivoral challenges

[Indoorvoice]

Oops. Double post.

[Itsallaboutthem]

I can see this is a hot button for you, but I can't offer a honest opinion without one question answered. (I do mostly special needs here, just for reference.)

If the parents can afford one to one care in your environment, why can't they afford one to one in his own home?

This is not sarcasm, it is a valid and honest question.

I don't feel like I can disclose the full situation, but the family is not paying for the one/one care. Nor does the pay fully cover our cost. I am taking on this particular child as a "paying it forward" act.
There is no funds for private care at home. The hot topic for me is the "pass the buck" attitude, and the "if they are not easy" they must go.
I do think anyone should take on something they cannot handle or not willing to commit to helping. I however have made this commitment and I thought I made it clear, I was looking for positive things that have worked for others.
I do appreciate your question and I hope I have cleared it up.

[nannyde]

I don't feel like I can disclose the full situation, but the family is not paying for the one/one care. Nor does the pay fully cover our cost. I am taking on this particular child as a "paying it forward" act.
There is no funds for private care at home. The hot topic for me is the "pass the buck" attitude, and the "if they are not easy" they must go.
I do think anyone should take on something they cannot handle or not willing to commit to helping. I however have made this commitment and I thought I made it clear, I was looking for positive things that have worked for others.
I do appreciate your question and I hope I have cleared it up.

We can't respond only in the direction of your question. With experience, we often see issues within the question that are more valuable than the question itself.

If you decide to do this community service it is very comendable. I couldn't manage it myself and give huge props to those who can.

Assessing that the child himself deserves to be in the environment where he flourishes so perfectly that the issues the provider has are completely nonexistant and questioning why he isn't then ALWAYS where he does so beautifully is NOT "pass the buck" or "if they aren't easy they must go". A seasoned provider would reccomend that the child ALWAYS be where he does so incredibly well.

This isn't about you and what you think is necessary. It's about the child and the child has an environment where he is completely different than at your home. I just don't GET why you take offense to that assessment.. unless of course the parents are lying and he is the same everywhere he goes. If that is the case then that's a whole nutter kettle o fish. A child who does beautifully in one environment and is violent in another HAS the ability to be non violent. A child who is violent everywhere he goes most likely does not.

So because of this.. the advice is completely different between the two. You don't get to decide what advice is given. You just get to decide what advice you will take.