For Ten Year Plus Veterans.... Can I Ask?

[Josiegirl]

For ladies who have done ten years or more of IN HOME child care, may I ask your opinion

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well?

Best estimate around 30%(seems like it's a lot to ask of kids these days)

Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids.

I believe they all(mostly all) had their best interests at heart and meant well with the way they disciplined, etc. While I don't agree with a lot of different things they did, I'd have to say maybe 70% were trying their very best

Now the same question of the last five-years. Same

Now the same questions of the last year. Same

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

20% I had 1 dcf, perfect older sister but younger brother was a biter, didn't listen, rules didn't apply to him, absolutely strong-willed all the way. 2 completely opposite kids from same family and I don't suspect they were brought up all that differently. Wonderful parents and I still think very highly of them.

Not that you asked this but I want to offer my opinion anyways. I think so many parents believe to be a good parent these days they need to offer a zillion choices to their kids to the point where the kids are getting to call too many of the shots. Their kids run the whole family's lives so try to run everybody else's too.

ETA: 32 years of in-home daycare

[Angelsj]

I am much more picky now and I will easily pass on a parent/family/child that I feel does not share the same parenting and discipline philosophies as I do.

This exactly. I used to take a lot of problem children; kids who had been kicked out of other day cares for behavior issues. Special needs kids, military kids (not that these are bad parents, but stressed often) and living in a very low income area (by design) and providing low cost care to area families, with supplementation from churches and community outreach.

Today, I am pickier with WHAT special needs I take, and I am very careful when I interview a family.

[Annalee]

This exactly. I used to take a lot of problem children; kids who had been kicked out of other day cares for behavior issues. Special needs kids, military kids (not that these are bad parents, but stressed often) and living in a very low income area (by design) and providing low cost care to area families, with supplementation from churches and community outreach.

Today, I am pickier with WHAT special needs I take, and I am very careful when I interview a family.

I agree totally, with this as well, and my daycare kids act well while in my care, BUT they are high-maintenance when I get them due to their parents being high-maintenance....It is like daylight and dark with the difference from daycare to home....For example, a child that is now 2 I got when she was 6 weeks and honestly, when they brought her in she was asleep in the car seat and had pillows/blankets/ around her and told me NOT to make noise or move her..two years later they still do not even run tv when she sleeps???? Another example, a child whom is now 4 in my care came to me at the age of 1 and she expected me to send daily text during every activity of her special **** in pics....????? It is the parents that I see changing....I run my routine for me and it works once the child realizes there are rules/expectations in my program.

[Childminder]

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well? 75%

Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids. 80%

Now the same question of the last five-years. 70%

Now the same questions of the last year. 70%

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids? 5%

[nannyde]

Awww thanks ladies. Any more?

[KiddieCahoots]

For ladies who have done ten years or more of IN HOME child care, may I ask your opinion

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well?50%

Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids. 40%

Now the same question of the last five-years. 20%

Now the same questions of the last year. 20%

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

0%. I found that my parents that were top quality, and well behaved had children that were top quality, and well behaved. I have on occasion had a child that was fantastic, with a poor family background, but never top quality parents and kids with poor behavior.

Talk about a trip down memory lane! Lol!

[AmyKidsCo]

I've been in FCC almost 20 years... I can't begin to estimate percentages, but it's gone up and down depending on my situation. I started out in graduate school in St. Louis where it was all "up" then moved to MI where it was mostly "up" (only problem was 1 family on assistance). Most of my time has been here in WI and it started lower and moved up - lower when I had more low income/assistance families and higher since I stopped taking assistance. Like Blackcat said, I'm pickier about who I enroll now than I used to be.

[Laurel]

For ladies who have done ten years or more of IN HOME child care, may I ask your opinion

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well?

90%

Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids.

90%

Now the same question of the last five-years.

same

Now the same questions of the last year.

95%

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

None, as it seems like the few true behavior problems I had were from families where the parents were lacking. In some they were doing their best but they were just misguided. I never had a child that I felt was neglected or not cared for by their parents.

Laurel

[Cat Herder]

1a. Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well?

Last 10 = 40% (I am assuming you mean upon enrollment.)

(*first 10 = 80% )

1b. Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? ( Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids.)

Last 10 = 100% (allowing for parent/guardian, not just parent, as several are with grandparents the bulk of the parenting time)

(first 10 = 100%)

2a. Now the same question of the last five-years.

Last 5 = 20%

2b. Last 5 = 100%

3a. Now the same questions of the last year.

This year = 0%

3b. This year = 0%


4. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

0% and this includes my special needs kids. (allowing for developmentally appropriate issues)

*** What I am currently experiencing seems to be an extreme pendulum swing from the perceived Government interference with parenting, education and childcare. I have parents demanding I serve majority junk foods and not do curriculum with their children for the very first time in my career. I have perspective clients who ask if I am licensed and tell me they are not interested in a "State" program. I am baffled and trying to hang on as long as I can.... It is illegal to provide childcare for more than 2 kids without being licensed here. IDK. Hope this trend ends quickly. Spite parenting? Is this a new thing???

[Blackcat31]

*** What I am currently experiencing seems to be an extreme pendulum swing from the perceived Government interference with parenting, education and childcare. I have parents demanding I serve majority junk foods and not do curriculum with their children for the very first time in my career. I have perspective clients who ask if I am licensed and tell me they are not interested in a "State" program. I am baffled and trying to hang on as long as I can.... It is illegal to provide childcare for more than 2 kids without being licensed here. IDK. Hope this trend ends quickly. Spite parenting? Is this a new thing???

I am betting it's because a majority of these parents have heard the spiel "Licensing does not allow me to _______." therefore I (the provider) cannot accommodate your needs/requests/instructions etc so to get around being denied their right to TV, i-pads, video games and crappy foods, parents are seeking out non-licensed or non-regulated care.

That way THEY (parents) can dictate everything from activities, food and costs.

[My3cents]

For ladies who have done ten years or more of IN HOME child care, may I ask your opinion

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well? I am not good with percents so I will just answer in general....most of my kids have been good or after a while with me transition into better then when they started with me.

Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids. I would say most parents do the best that they can with what they have and it depends on many factors. It might be because I don't want to work with the loonies- way out there parents. I don't always agree with others parenting styles but have to take a step back and tell myself this is how the parent is deciding to raise their own kid, not the way I would but that is ok- at my house we go by my rules.

Now the same question of the last five-years.the last five years there is no doubt that cell phones and being hooked to the internet and www has had influence on how parents parent. Many of them use the Tv, computer, games as sitters for the kids. I have good parents that spend time with the kids but no doubt is that time managed differently in the last five years as technology has been more assessable to everyone. It is just where our world has moved too. I say you keep up and move with it or you get left behind and are doing catch up like a crazy person. Change is hard for all-

Now the same questions of the last year. I lumped my answer in with the five year response

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

for sure..... but it varies and depends on so many variables. I have top notch parents. I find saying the word NO to the kids has become more of a taboo in todays world. Parents are afraid to do this, they want instant gratification and not to have to deal with little wonderful having a screaming fit or hurt feelings or being let down. I do feel this will change as more people figure out its not realistic and sets up little wonderful to be disillusioned,defunct etc... I find instant gratification has taken away true "hard workers" and allowed a society of lazy people that have little self worth-

This is just my 3cents.....I understand 97 other cents out there to listen too.....ha ha and I do listen, maybe I don't agree but I listen.

It will be interesting to see what you do with all of this Nan, hope you will share. Sorry I couldn't be more of a help % wise

[Cat Herder]

I am betting it's because a majority of these parents have heard the spiel "Licensing does not allow me to _______." therefore I (the provider) cannot accommodate your needs/requests/instructions etc so to get around being denied their right to TV, i-pads, video games and crappy foods, parents are seeking out non-licensed or non-regulated care.

That way THEY (parents) can dictate everything from activities, food and costs.

I'd believe that in full confidence if it was only the parents of the older toddlers or sibling groups. Especially if they had been through multiple providers.

My concern of a trend is because I am getting this from my newborn/first child interviews as well. :confused::confused: (remember, I *usually* only enroll newborns) It is simply odd, IMHO.

***I do know early voting has started and many are still riled up from the ballots back in May...**

[dalman]

For ladies who have done ten years or more of IN HOME child care, may I ask your opinion

Of the last ten years of experience can you tell me the percentage of kids in your child care who are well behaved, respectful, calm, kind, good eaters, and sleep well?
The last ten years would be about 90%. The last five years would be about 50%. And the last year would be about 30%.
Out of that percentage can you tell me what percent of their parents do you believe were doing a good job as parents? Meaning they disciplined fairly, had expectations of good behavior, fed healthy food, kept kids clean in well fitted clothing, expected reasonable sleep... rest schedules, expected manners.. and spent a good amount of awake time with their kids.
Out of those children in the 90% category, 100% of those parents were doing a terrific job. The last five years and past year it would say that 100% of the parents in the corresponding percentages were doing a great job.

Now the same question of the last five-years.

Now the same questions of the last year.

Last question. In your entire experience of ten years plus... what percentage of kids have you had where the parents were what you would consider top quality parents but had kids with poor behavior over the years you had the kids?

. i would say that poor parenting is a direct correlation to poor behavior in children. After being a licensed daycare provider for almost thirty years, I feel I am parenting the parents as much as I am parenting the children. I don't know what went wrong with this generation, but there certainly seems to be a steady decline in parenting skills. And I am picky for the most part about who joins our daycare family. We all seem to share the same beliefs and core values, but they seem to be at a loss when it comes to parenting.

[Angelsj]

. i would say that poor parenting is a direct correlation to poor behavior in children. After being a licensed daycare provider for almost thirty years, I feel I am parenting the parents as much as I am parenting the children. I don't know what went wrong with this generation, but there certainly seems to be a steady decline in parenting skills. And I am picky for the most part about who joins our daycare family. We all seem to share the same beliefs and core values, but they seem to be at a loss when it comes to parenting.

Ok, while I get that poor parenting can contribute to poor behavior in children, I am a little offended at this. I am an excellent parent. I have a Cdev degree and I have been doing this for over 30 years.
My kids are pretty good kids, but four of them are somewhere on the spectrum. Between birth-6 and again between 13-17 two of them were incredibly difficult behavior wise. To the point that most people would assume they were "poorly parented."
Exactly the opposite is true. They had to be parented differently in order to be successful, but I did what I had to do to bring them up with values and an understanding of others, despite the huge struggle to do so. (And I am still working on my 14 yo)
I have also had kids who were VERY poorly parented who were golden children; smart, funny, well behaved and had wonderful manners.
I currently have two that have some behavior issues, whose parents are pretty good (certainly not terrible) and working on it. They didn't do anything wrong; these kids are just tough cookies.

[nannyde]

I'd believe that in full confidence if it was only the parents of the older toddlers or sibling groups. Especially if they had been through multiple providers.

My concern of a trend is because I am getting this from my newborn/first child interviews as well. :confused::confused: (remember, I *usually* only enroll newborns) It is simply odd, IMHO.

***I do know early voting has started and many are still riled up from the ballots back in May...**

Ahh how I love seeing this username B-)