More About My 17 Month Old

[permanentvacation]

I found out why she won't sleep for nap time (she averages 1/2 hour to 45 mins. max when I'm lucky!) and why she just screams the entire time.

She sleeps with her mother and while drinking a bottle which she is allowed to keep ****ing on throughout the night even after it's empty. I am not allowed to give her a bottle to sleep with and am certainly not allowed to or going to lay down with her! I am simply fighting a losing battle here until her mother starts raising her right at home! UGHHHH!!!!

[craftymissbeth]

I have a 6 month old dcb and up until about a month ago they were giving him a bottle in order to get to sleep. I'm (un)lucky that dcm is my sister, but I just straight out told her it was against regulations for me to allow a child to fall asleep with a bottle in their mouth and in order to make this work we needed to get him trained to sleep without props. It didn't take long, really to get it sorted out.

Crazy sleep habits are a no-go for me.

[Unregistered]

! I am simply fighting a losing battle here until her mother starts raising her right at home! UGHHHH!!!!

I can sense your frustration but as a parent I take offense, while it doesn't work for you and your daycare it doesn't mean her mother is raising her wrong at home. We are a attachment parenting, babywearing, co-sleeping family. My son co-slept full time until he was 4. Took a bottle until he was 18 months. He is a well adjusted school ager now. Just because its not how you do things or want things doesn't have to mean its wrong. If its too much for you to handle maybe it would be best to term.



TLEmother

[AmyKidsCo]

Is the mom open to trying a pacifier instead of a bottle? That way she could have the comfort from ****ing without possibly harming her teeth.

[midaycare]

Is the mom open to trying a pacifier instead of a bottle? That way she could have the comfort from ****ing without possibly harming her teeth.

This. Why destroy the teeth?

[permanentvacation]

I gave her a pacifier the other day and she didn't take to it. I told the mother that I tried to give her a pacifier and she said the child stopped using a pacifier herself at 6 months of age. I think she does want to be able to sip on a drink whenever she wants.

[Heidi]

I can sense your frustration but as a parent I take offense, while it doesn't work for you and your daycare it doesn't mean her mother is raising her wrong at home. We are a attachment parenting, babywearing, co-sleeping family. My son co-slept full time until he was 4. Took a bottle until he was 18 months. He is a well adjusted school ager now. Just because its not how you do things or want things doesn't have to mean its wrong. If its too much for you to handle maybe it would be best to term.



TLEmother

PV was frustrated. I'm sure she MEANT "They are not raising him right to be happy in a daycare setting" vs. "they are not raising him right" period.

As for the co-sleeping, that part is not my thing, but not wrong, per se. Putting a child to bed with a bottle in their mouth is not okay, though. I've seen this first hand with dck's who've come to me with teeth like this:

[permanentvacation]

I thought of me putting the terms 'raise her right' wasn't the best choice of words after I posted that. However a parent wants to raise their child is their business. And different things work for different families.

However, if you are going to send you child to daycare, I fully believe that you have to raise your child to be able to conform to what they are going to need to do on a typical day at daycare. For example, if you are going to send your child to daycare, you can't get them used to sleeping only in their crib in their room with the door shut and keep the house perfectly quiet while the child naps. You will be setting them up for not being able to sleep at naptime in a daycare setting. If you want your child to go to daycare, then you can't allow them to go to the fridge and get food all day all night whenever they want and snack constantly all day long. They will not be able to conform to being in daycare and have specific meal times.

It just makes life so much harder on a child if their family does things that are so much different than the daycare does. If a child is raised to have such different ways, then it would be much easier for the child if they had a nanny or babysitter who could conform to the child's ways rather than putting the child into a group setting in a daycare where we have specific rules and guidelines about what we are and are not allowed to do with the children. (such as not allowed to lay them down with a bottle)

[permanentvacation]

37 minutes! That's all she slept! What 17 month old only sleeps for 37 minutes??

[permanentvacation]

Yeah, baby bottle rot is horrible! I had only seen pictures of it for years in different daycare classes. But one day at the dentist office, I went to the counter to pay for my visit. A lady came up with her baby and plopped the baby on the counter. I looked at the baby, smiled, and said, "Hi" to him. He smiled this big 'ole happy smile and I about died! All of his teeth looked like the tip of a ball point pen! It's one thing to see pictures, but a complete shocking experience to see it in person!

[cheerfuldom]

I do not take care of children that won't nap for me. Now that you know that mom is co-sleeping and using a bottle with the little one, and you can't replicate that at daycare, I would begin the process of replacing/terming this child. You are fighting an uphill battle here. Yes some kids can adjust to multiple environments but a lot of kids can't. I dont know how long this child has been in your care but it doesn't appear it is going to work out.

[Childminder]

I turned a parent in to CPS for bottle rot. The child was with me one week and whined in discomfort constantly her teeth were completely rotted. I did not give her a bottle at all and she would ask mom at pickup if she would take her home and give her a bottle of Coca-Cola.

There are other means of comfort that a parent can give to a child besides a bottle especially if she's sleeping with her.

[permanentvacation]

She's been here for 3 weeks. She should have adjusted by now. I have been advertising to try to replace her but haven't even gotten any calls! People have already gotten their kids situated in daycare for the summer. We don't usually get too many calls for daycare this time of year. I can't afford to just stop watching her. I finally put her on the floor and she just laid there quietly. I don't care if they are actually asleep or not. But they have to stay still and quiet. Her mom just picked her up (early) and I told her that she stayed still and quiet on the floor on a sleeping bag. She told me that since they moved her to stay at her cousin's, the mother and child have been sleeping on the floor in the cousin's house. So she is used to sleeping on the floor. So, next week, I am going to try putting her on the floor instead of in a playpen and see how that works.

[Heidi]

She's been here for 3 weeks. She should have adjusted by now. I have been advertising to try to replace her but haven't even gotten any calls! People have already gotten their kids situated in daycare for the summer. We don't usually get too many calls for daycare this time of year. I can't afford to just stop watching her. I finally put her on the floor and she just laid there quietly. I don't care if they are actually asleep or not. But they have to stay still and quiet. Her mom just picked her up (early) and I told her that she stayed still and quiet on the floor on a sleeping bag. She told me that since they moved her to stay at her cousin's, the mother and child have been sleeping on the floor in the cousin's house. So she is used to sleeping on the floor. So, next week, I am going to try putting her on the floor instead of in a playpen and see how that works.

Maybe you could go with the "you get to sleep on the mat on the floor like a BIG GIRL if you're nice and quiet!"

My 18 mo dcg would probably understand that. If she wakes up early, she can look at books, but stay on her mat.

[SunshineMama]

I can sense your frustration but as a parent I take offense, while it doesn't work for you and your daycare it doesn't mean her mother is raising her wrong at home. We are a attachment parenting, babywearing, co-sleeping family. My son co-slept full time until he was 4. Took a bottle until he was 18 months. He is a well adjusted school ager now. Just because its not how you do things or want things doesn't have to mean its wrong. If its too much for you to handle maybe it would be best to term.



TLEmother

Attachment parenting doesn't work in a group daycare setting. I semi attachment parent my kids, and I am their sole care provider. You can't expect someone to dedicate the tune and energy it takes to attachment parent, with other kids around. Dcm either needs to get a nanny or stay home herself. It's not fair to the child.