Seriously Thinking Of Doing Background Checks On Parents

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  • Littleplanet
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jun 2014
    • 9

    Seriously Thinking Of Doing Background Checks On Parents

    I am new here and very upset with what I have learned about one of the daycare families that are no longer in my daycare. Lots of things have happened that I could go into great detail but the main thing is this woman and man have lied from the day they came in. No truth in what they have said or what they do. I let these people into my home and around the children I care for and he was convicted of a serious felony and another pending and she is (get this) a **** star. I thought a stripper-I didn't judge. Grandma came with them for the initial visit. She worked for the school district so I thought maybe what I thought wasn't true.
    They loved my daycare until I stood my ground and now I have bad reviews on my daycare site from people who don't tell the truth. Saying unacceptable things happen here and that I am not professional. I let my personal life interfere with my job. I had a hysterectomy and need 6 weeks off, I only took 5 and I work 10-12 hour days.
    I am so furious that I let them into my home. I had no idea until I dug a little deeper. Would it be unacceptable to tell the parents that I do background checks on them before they come into my home? I am not even sure I will take on new kids now.
  • NightOwl
    Advanced Daycare.com Member
    • Mar 2014
    • 2722

    #2
    I won't lie, I snoop into people's lives before offering them a spot. I look up their Facebook pages and scroll through their comments and posts for as far back as Facebook will allow. And I don't consider this to be unethical. Just like you said, you're letting them into your home. They want to know everything about you, so why shouldn't you feel the same? I think it's rate for a provider to request background checks on parents, but it is within your rights. And you will likely turn some families off by it, but others would appreciate your thoroughness.

    Comment

    • NoMoreJuice!
      Daycare.com Member
      • Jan 2014
      • 715

      #3
      I've always wanted to ask for a credit report. If they can't pay their bills elsewhere, why would I expect them to pay me?

      Comment

      • tehck_1013
        Provider In Training
        • May 2014
        • 96

        #4
        Originally posted by NoMoreJuice!
        I've always wanted to ask for a credit report. If they can't pay their bills elsewhere, why would I expect them to pay me?
        I've heard that providerwatch.com (?) Is very helpful in finding out if a family has had issues in the past with another provider. In addition to this, I personally 'look up' everyone. The internet is a tell all. If they are social, I scour it. Why not, its there for the world to see. I think craigslist stopped doing this, but when I would email back and forth with someone whom I was going to meet for some reason or another (usually to pick up or buy something) I would take the email they were writing from and paste it into facebook and it would pop up who they were and I could see if they looked like a crazy person or not. Its not thorough and doesnt necesarily mean you are safe but sometimes seeing they didnt look shady was enough for me. You can tell a lot about people from their facebook. Some people are very conservative and aren't public though. And I dont have a problem doing this at all because we live in a digital world now. Requiring a background check is also not out of the question, especially if you think they are perfect and really want to sign them... they look up the crap out of you online too, you know they do...

        Comment

        • coolconfidentme
          Daycare.com Member
          • Oct 2012
          • 1541

          #5
          I look everyone including the people on the pick up list. Once I found the DCD on the sex offender registry. This guy has his kids living with him! HOW?? I called the hotline number to report it.

          Comment

          • midaycare
            Daycare.com Member
            • Jan 2014
            • 5658

            #6
            I don't ask for bg checks, but I do snoop. If I can see their Facebook page and I don't like what I see, next! Then I check out all the other social media if FB is okay.

            Comment

            • MotherNature
              Matilda Jane Addict
              • Feb 2013
              • 1120

              #7
              Are you mad because she lied about her job? So what, she does adult movies... I don't get the shaming of sex workers, especially when so many, myself included use their products..(As far as movies go..) Now the felonies would give me pause depending on what they were for and when...Armed robbery 20 yrs ago would be different from armed robbery last year. I see that you said one's pending. As far as checking up on people, I totally prescreen people on facebook if I can. If someone has pages liking the tea party and anti-gay comments/likes on their page, it just will not work here. I have a trans child, a bi husband, and we're very liberal. Not trying to exclude for politics, as our parents are all very conservative and religious & we still love them, but I would not purposely choose to do business with someone who considers us an abomination or disgrace, or going to hell...what have you. If they're conservative, fine, but if they're rabid about it and against equal rights, not going to work here. Next time, definitely try facebook to see if they seem like they won't be a good fit. Sorry they're slandering you though.

              Comment

              • MotherNature
                Matilda Jane Addict
                • Feb 2013
                • 1120

                #8
                Originally posted by coolconfidentme
                I look everyone including the people on the pick up list. Once I found the DCD on the sex offender registry. This guy has his kids living with him! HOW?? I called the hotline number to report it.
                Scary! Good for you! Did you ever find out how it ended?

                Comment

                • coolconfidentme
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Oct 2012
                  • 1541

                  #9
                  Originally posted by MotherNature
                  Scary! Good for you! Did you ever find out how it ended?
                  No I didn't. Will they tell me???

                  Comment

                  • permanentvacation
                    Advanced Daycare.com Member
                    • Jun 2011
                    • 2461

                    #10
                    I honestly think I should! I've had a father who had kidnapped his son from his mother!!!! I've had a couple of fathers who had recently been released from jail; one for violently breaking into a home and robbing the house!

                    It is scary for us. We open our home to complete strangers. We expose our children, ourselves, our pets, and our daycare children to complete strangers. We were taught while we were growing up not to talk to strangers, not to get into strangers cars, not to go into strangers houses, but here we are inviting every stranger who says they have a kid into OUR home! Kind of dangerous to begin with!
                    Last edited by permanentvacation; 06-26-2014, 05:46 AM. Reason: made corrections

                    Comment

                    • Blackcat31
                      • Oct 2010
                      • 36124

                      #11
                      Originally posted by MotherNature
                      Are you mad because she lied about her job? So what, she does adult movies... I don't get the shaming of sex workers, especially when so many, myself included use their products..(As far as movies go..) Now the felonies would give me pause depending on what they were for and when...Armed robbery 20 yrs ago would be different from armed robbery last year. I see that you said one's pending. As far as checking up on people, I totally prescreen people on facebook if I can. If someone has pages liking the tea party and anti-gay comments/likes on their page, it just will not work here. I have a trans child, a bi husband, and we're very liberal. Not trying to exclude for politics, as our parents are all very conservative and religious & we still love them, but I would not purposely choose to do business with someone who considers us an abomination or disgrace, or going to hell...what have you. If they're conservative, fine, but if they're rabid about it and against equal rights, not going to work here. Next time, definitely try facebook to see if they seem like they won't be a good fit. Sorry they're slandering you though.
                      I feel the same OP. Are you upset after the fact at the way they behaved within your contractual time with them or are you mad because they didnt tell you their personal details.

                      If you are upset about how the daycare agreement/relationship went, I don't understand what that has to do with what the parents do for a living.

                      As for the bad reviews, can you add a rebuttal to defend yourself?



                      Originally posted by coolconfidentme
                      I look everyone including the people on the pick up list. Once I found the DCD on the sex offender registry. This guy has his kids living with him! HOW?? I called the hotline number to report it.
                      Just because he was on the sex offender list doesn't mean he was a danger to his children. I've read countless stories about people being placed on these lists for crimes that really don't fit that bill or aren't really what we all think...

                      I have a DCD that has to register on the sex offender list for dating his wife when they were in High School. He was 18 and a Senior..she was 15 and a freshman. Her parents pressed charges when she refused to stop seeing him. He was charged.

                      Once she turned 18, she married him. He still has to register but he still gets to live with his children.

                      It isn't always what we assume.

                      Comment

                      • EntropyControlSpecialist
                        Embracing the chaos.
                        • Mar 2012
                        • 7466

                        #12
                        What I wish I could do is call references for their personality and character. Boy, have I had some crazy ones come through my doors (and then right back out shortly thereafter due to me terming/them terming). It stresses me out just to think about.

                        Comment

                        • Unregistered

                          #13
                          My comment didn't post. Maybe because it had the s** word in it?

                          Comment

                          • Blackcat31
                            • Oct 2010
                            • 36124

                            #14
                            Originally posted by EntropyControlSpecialist
                            What I wish I could do is call references for their personality and character. Boy, have I had some crazy ones come through my doors (and then right back out shortly thereafter due to me terming/them terming). It stresses me out just to think about.
                            Agree!

                            Sometimes it's the ones who have no traceable history or criminal past....just the whack-a-doodle ones that have me freaked out too.

                            Comment

                            • craftymissbeth
                              Legally Unlicensed
                              • May 2012
                              • 2385

                              #15
                              I'm more worried about the freaky ones who do/have done horrible things yet have never been caught. Think about it, I'm sure each of us has to have had contact with a complete psycho at one point in our lives.

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