ugh! Enrolling older infants is NOT for me...

[playground1]

Getting lost in the sea of posts but I think someone (Blackcat, I think) asked what I do when multiple children need to be rocked at naptime. Well, all of my kiddos (babies and "big kids") sleep in the same room. The pack and plays are always set-up and we lay out the cots for the 2's,3's, and 4's daily. We are allowed two children under the age of 2 and four children between 2-5. (NYS defines an infant in FCC as under two.) I personally enroll one "big baby" and one "little baby" at a time. The older kids lay down and I rock the baby to sleep. This usually takes between 5-10 minutes. If the other baby is still one that likes to get rocked I have him/her sit with or near us and sing or talk quietly to him/her until I lay the little baby down. Then, I rock the big baby. If any of the tots need rocked they are next but usually they like to be more independent by the time they are 2. The whole process doesn't take very long at all. It really works well for me and my babes and kiddos - that is one of the main reasons I try to get other people to try it . I can see though that if you cared for more than two or three infants by yourself you might have to have a different system.

Yep, that's pretty much what we do. It works. lovethis

I'm not out of discussion on how to put them to bed. Still here for that.

[KiddieCahoots]

I am really not going to waste my time arguing about hurt feelings. We're adults here. It's just a tactic to distract from the original discussion. Which is why she felt she had to say it four times.

On that note, I'm leaving this discussion because it's devolved.

Wow! A comment to this would not even necessary at this point. Your colors are clear!
But that's not my style.....
Your the one who brought the word neglect into this.
If your going to get offended for people reacting to that, then educate yourself on the word before you use it.
Ignorance is bliss!

[Heidi]

I think coming to you for comfort is a huge step!

And I totally agree that it can be very difficult to teach a child to sleep when they are used to motion sleeping (swing, car, etc.).

Also, if everyone could go back and read Heidi's original post. It is helpful to sometimes remember what was actually said by the person saying it . Heidi says the little girl is cute as a button but cries & cries during naps. She didn't say she hates the baby and she leaves it to cry in a dark room all day.

thank you!

and to add, I wouldn't have even posted if I didn't feel bad for her having to learn this skill. It's hard on both of us...even though I am trying to help her as much as I can. I just don't have a lot of tools to use. Rocking her to sleep, at this point, would not help her, because it's not what she wants.

[playground1]

Uh, that's what I do! :confused:

I honestly think the problem might be the bed issue. What's nice about mats is that I can touch them and be close to them without holding them. And for whoever said the 9 month old wouldn't stay on a mat (Heidi), we have these:

http://www.communityplaythings.de/products/baby-room/sleeping/g961

It's unfortunate that you have to use P&P.

[Blackcat31]

thank you!

and to add, I wouldn't have even posted if I didn't feel bad for her having to learn this skill. It's hard on both of us...even though I am trying to help her as much as I can. I just don't have a lot of tools to use. Rocking her to sleep, at this point, would not help her, because it's not what she wants.

I think Leanna did a fantastic job of explaining her methods and how she did things. It helped me...now I have a perspective I didn't have before.

[Heidi]

It's been a rough nap time again today!

She slept 45 minutes, which was just enough time for me to get the dishes put away, everyone else settled, and wipe down the floor, which is disgusting.

I know what the problem is; it's not sleep. It's confinement. She screams whenever she is placed in any type of confinement..the stroller, the cart, the outdoor baby zone, her pnp, her chair. She only stops when movement begins. Move the stroller, the cart, or the car (with her car seat in it), and she immediately stops crying. Food, now that she knows that chair= food, also distracts her enough to tolerate it. On that note, she's gone from being 100% fed by an adult to 100% self feeding in 2 weeks. She's almost mastered the cup, too, although I am still suplementing with bottles.

Not an option here. I cannot nap her on a mat (and she wouldn't stay at 9 months), and I cannot nap her in a swing. Regs say pnp or crib.

I'm quoting myself here, because THIS is the problem, from what I've narrowed it down to.

We have the same problem playing outside. I have an area just for her, but she is miserable there because it has 3 walls (I left one end open). Even when I sit in there WITH her, she screams. The rest of the yard is wood chips and acorns; choking hazards. She screams if she's in the stroller; unless it's moving. So, while 3 children play happily, she is miserable.

ay yay yay!

[Blackcat31]

I'm quoting myself here, because THIS is the problem, from what I've narrowed it down to.

We have the same problem playing outside. I have an area just for her, but she is miserable there because it has 3 walls (I left one end open). Even when I sit in there WITH her, she screams. The rest of the yard is wood chips and acorns; choking hazards. She screams if she's in the stroller; unless it's moving. So, while 3 children play happily, she is miserable.

ay yay yay!

I think it is important to mention her too that you don't have co-workers.

You are a one woman show.

Changes things up as when your options are limited because you are the only one in the room over 3 ft tall. ::

[SignMeUp]

We are not allowed to hold a sleeping infant (under 12 months) or carry them in any device or place them in any device or keep them in any device except a pack 'n' play or crib, bare, no bumper, no blanket, no toy, no lovey. They may have a pacifier that is not attached to them by any device.

From birth, infants are learning to separate from their parents and to begin to meet their own needs rather than having their needs met. It is a slow process, but that is what is happening. They are fed, they learn to hold a bottle (in care), they are spoon-fed, they learn to finger-feed and then use utensils. They are soothed by us, they learn to self-soothe and eventually to regulate their own behavior.

Each habit that their parents/caregivers develop is just that - a habit, a way of doing things. It is what that infant is accustomed to. It is the way in which they have made sense of their world, the way that that individual baby's world works. So, each parent/caregiver is training them into certain expectations.

To me what is being discussed here, is the mismatch that sometimes occurs between the parental training and the provider training of an infant.
From my own perspective, this seems to be on the upswing in recent years, partly because of the extreme change in recent years in the expectation of what a proper sleep environment looks like in the child care setting.

For me, what it's come to is this: I feel lucky now when a family wants to interview with me before birth, because I have the opportunity to let them know what the expectations are here, and why. I have handouts and websites so that they can prepare themselves before the baby is born and they actually have the time and energy to read all about it Very little information about this seems to be given to parents by their doctor or hospital. Most parents are surprised. And then they want to be sure to set their sleep situation up safely, both for home, and to do the best preparation possible to make a smooth transition to child care.

And all I have to add besides that is: I have had two infants in care many, many times. Most of them remain friends that understand each other deeply, to this day, even when they are very different in interests or personality.
We call them our "childcare twins" but obviously we know they are not. And if children were truly meant to be cared for only one-parent-to-one-infant, parents of actual twins would be in big trouble

[craftymissbeth]

I honestly think the problem might be the bed issue. What's nice about mats is that I can touch them and be close to them without holding them. And for whoever said the 9 month old wouldn't stay on a mat (Heidi), we have these:

http://www.communityplaythings.de/products/baby-room/sleeping/g961

It's unfortunate that you have to use P&P.

I would love to be able to use floor beds. I'm not sold on the safety, but I love the concept and they just look beautiful and inviting.

[playground1]

I would love to be able to use floor beds. I'm not sold on the safety, but I love the concept and they just look beautiful and inviting.

That site I linked to is pretty interesting. It's a religious group similar to the Amish and they make all that stuff themselves. There's an English version too. Check out these cots:

http://www.communityplaythings.com/products/sleep-and-hygiene/listing/cots?guid={B01F6F89-9B25-45B9-B1E7-ABCB672BCAC7}

I think they would be so nice for the older kids. You know how they like to have something special for being big.

What safety aspect are you concerned about?

[craftymissbeth]

That site I linked to is pretty interesting. It's a religious group similar to the Amish and they make all that stuff themselves. There's an English version too. Check out these cots:

http://www.communityplaythings.com/products/sleep-and-hygiene/listing/cots?guid={B01F6F89-9B25-45B9-B1E7-ABCB672BCAC7}

I think they would be so nice for the older kids. You know how they like to have something special for being big.

What safety aspect are you concerned about?

My nephew passed away from SIDS so I'm extra specific about how I sleep infants. For me, the safest place is a crib or PNP. But I do still love the idea of floor beds for infants.

I think my toddlers would love them though. I'll have to take a look through that link.
Eta: I have seen those on that site and I love them. I'd love to switch to cots like that eventually. Right now I use nap mats.

[playground1]

My nephew passed away from SIDS so I'm extra specific about how I sleep infants.

I'm very sorry.

[NightOwl]

Hang on...., I need to get some popcorn.

[Heidi]

That site I linked to is pretty interesting. It's a religious group similar to the Amish and they make all that stuff themselves. There's an English version too. Check out these cots:

http://www.communityplaythings.com/products/sleep-and-hygiene/listing/cots?guid={B01F6F89-9B25-45B9-B1E7-ABCB672BCAC7}

I think they would be so nice for the older kids. You know how they like to have something special for being big.

What safety aspect are you concerned about?

I talked to them just today about a table! I love Community Playthings!

They don't have those beds in the US version of their catalog. Presumably because most states don't allow them here. I am going to enjoy browsing the german version.

Have you called them? If so, do they speak German with you? Both my reps had "German" names...Brigitte, and now Heidi. I wonder, but didn't notice an accent.

[playground1]

I talked to them just today about a table! I love Community Playthings!

They don't have those beds in the US version of their catalog. Presumably because most states don't allow them here. I am going to enjoy browsing the german version.

Have you called them? If so, do they speak German with you? Both my reps had "German" names...Brigitte, and now Heidi. I wonder, but didn't notice an accent.

We met a group of them at a trade fair here, so they spoke fluent German. I *think* they were American though, if I remember correctly.