Lots Of Questions! Kinda Long Story

[BNL]

Hi all, I've recently found myself in a very upsetting situation with a family I have had for 3 years. Dcb just turned 4 and started at 10 mos old and brother is 18 mos started at 4 wks old. About a month ago dcb 4 started vomiting after breakfast so I called for dad to pick up. He returned about 20 mins later and said that during the car ride home dcb said that my husband threw him against the wall when he threw up. This is absolutely untrue bc my husband was not even home at the time and would never ever do anything to a child. In front of the parents, I asked dcb to please show me where he alleged threw him at the wall. He pointed to a basket ball goal we have high up on the wall. After talking for over an hour and him calling my husband at work and accusing me of lie in he settled down and admitted that maybe dcb is making something up or confused about something. Idk if 4 yr Olds can Intentionally lie but it absolutely did not happen so I let it go and they apologized....this week dcb had an accident and wet his pants for first time in a very long time. Mom was fixing to be there for pick up, so I washed him off and realized I had no pull ups on hand. I looked through MY spare clothes basket which is full of mostly girls clothes bc I have 2 daughters and no boys of my own. All I could come up with were a pair of little girls panties. At this point 18 month old brother was having a melt down and I was trying to get others out the door. Told dcb that this was all we have until mommy gets here. When mom got there, I explained the situation and told her that I don't supply pull ups for accidents and they needed to supply a change of clothes for him. Next day at drop off she express how mad dad was that I put girl panties on his son, yet they didn't bring a spare change of clothes. Told me next time put one of brothers diapers on him......so, yesterday another accident. I put a diaper on him. Dad called and asked me to wash his underwear and put them back on and I told him I cannot run upstairs and do laundry during my work day. Both parents show up and withdrew the boys. Said that they absolutely refuse to pay for the last 2 weeks of care which I've always allowed them to pay bi weekly without issues bc they were one of my first families and I didn't know any better. Basically dad called me lastnight and said "you are my emoyee and I can fire you at any given moment without notice. You didn't provide the service that I pay you for by putting panties and diapers on my son"....he then goes on to say "I'm a nice guy so I'm gonna pay you for 18 month old for 2 weeks and 4 yr old for 1 week bc I feel u didn't properly care for him this current wk, I'll mail a cashiers check" there were several other things said but I'll leave that out.

Now for questions, how do I go about handling this without being in fear that he may come back and accuse me or my husband of something horrible? I have a signed contract covering, 2 wk withdrawal notice, parents responsible for bringing spare clothes, late fees, all of which this family has broken (I know, my fault for allowing it but I pick my battles).


I feel like he should pay me for the last 2 wks I've had both boys and the next 2 wks for not giving a notice just like I stated in my contract that they signed. How can I enforce my contract if parents absolutely refuse?


Sorry such a long post. I'm desperate for answers!

[BNL]

One more question, has anyone ever used a collect agency for unpaid fees?

[cara041083]

For question number 1- YOU TERM AND TELL THEM TO NOT COME BACK! If a parent is accusing you or your husband of harming there child, then its best to term. If your licensed, then I would call your licencor and explain to them what happened, what the parents said and give them a heads up. That way if they file a complaint against you you are 1 step ahead of the game. You shouldn't live in fear. I would get as far away from them as possible because you never know what they could say or do and what it could cost you. 1 kid is't worth that

#2- Where I am, I am not allowed to wash soiled clothes that are not my own children. I am to bag them up and give them to the parents. I am also supposed to have a change of clothes on hand or not accept the child.

These parents are being rude and unreasonable and If I was you I would put an end to it now and explain to them with being accused of those things, as well as not sending the things you need to properly provide for there child it is in everyone best interest to part ways. Let them know that you will require a two week fee (if its in your contract) and then go from there. I would also right everything up and email or mail so you have records of the conversation. If your not licensed, (I know some states you can watch kids with out it. Im not one of them) Then I would still do everything I mention above but you may be out the two weeks and stuff like that.

[cara041083]

and as for the collection agency, I know they are out there, but I don't have experience with it.

[Second Home]

I think the inly way would be to take them to court . Though that may open up another huge problem . Just be sure to have all documentation of dates , conversations and contracts if you do go to court.

[NightOwl]

You have a contract? That's your answer to all of this. Give him a deadline for payment for the previous two weeks and for the two week notice period. Tell him your small claims case will be filed at 8am the following morning if payment isn't received in full. Most court systems allow you to print the paperwork at home and mail it in to get things in motion. Have it ready to go. You could even send him a copy of the prepared paperwork so he sees that you're serious. I've done this before and it worked.

Tell him you are no one's employee and will not be treated as such. And if he makes any accusations toward you or your husband, a lawsuit for slander will follow. You WILL win.

This guy sounds like a bully and he's trying to intimidate you. He doesn't take you seriously as a business owner and obviously didn't take your contract seriously. So show him how serious you are.

[Blackcat31]

You have a contract? That's your answer to all of this. Give him a deadline for payment for the previous two weeks and for the two week notice period. Tell him your small claims case will be filed at 8am the following morning if payment isn't received in full. Most court systems allow you to print the paperwork at home and mail it in to get things in motion. Have it ready to go. You could even send him a copy of the prepared paperwork so he sees that you're serious. I've done this before and it worked.

Tell him you are no one's employee and will not be treated as such. And if he makes any accusations toward you or your husband, a lawsuit for slander will follow. You WILL win.

This guy sounds like a bully and he's trying to intimidate you. He doesn't take you seriously as a business owner and obviously didn't take your contract seriously. So show him how serious you are.

This ^^^^ AND call your licensor now before they do. Report what happened exactly as you have said it here.

[cara041083]

Well I must have missed the part where it said withdrew kids :: Yep its been that kind of day here. but the rest stands

[BNL]

Thanks ladies! I am in Texas and listed to care for 3 unrelated children. I follow all guidelines registered providers are supposed to follow. I just received a direct deposit for part of what he owes and I'm going to email him a copy of his signed contract and his balance. There is no way I'm accepting this family back into care. There have been several issues lately, that I just let go way too long. I guess I need to just look at this as a BIG learning experience.

[CraftyMom]

I just put girls underwear on my son ::

I need to do laundry, he didn't have anymore clean ones so I put my daughter's on him ::

Looks like I will be doing a ton of laundry this weekend!

[NightOwl]

So they didn't send extra clothes, as per your contract? And got angry when you improvised because of their negligence? Unbelievable...

[SSWonders]

Just want to say I'm sorry this has happened to you. I once had a dck accuse my 4 year old of doing something that never happened. I terminated immediately as I didn't want the risk of another accusation. It boggles my mind that this family is pulling for their own short comings.

[sharlan]

This guy sounds like a major bully. DO NOT get into a war of words with him, it will only escalate a bad situation.

This is how I would handle it.......
#1 RECORD AND DOCUMENT ALL COMMUNICATION
#2 stop all verbal contact
#3 send them a registered (certified ?) letter with a copy of your contract with a final date to pay all fees. Let them know that you are prepared to either go to small claims court or to turn it over to a collection agency which cannot guarantee you your money.
#4 after the letter is sent, do not respond to texts, emails, or calls

[MotherNature]

Sounds like a bully compensating for something. So what..you put girl's undies on his son. They're underwear! If he has a problem with it, provide clothes. His attitude screams that he views women as less than men, from his outburst about a preschooler wearing girl's underwear to the way he's treating you. Stick to your contract & stick it to him. Good luck & looking forward to an update.

[BNL]

This guy is very pushy and ****y. Has always tried to "cut me a