Terming One For Another

[TwinKristi]

I originally posted this in the private forum but didn't get much help so I will post for all to see.

So I've posted about a DCD who drives my cookoo, their schedule is okay... Short hours but only 4 days a week and their 5th day off is never the same. We finally FINALLY got them on a prepayment cycle and hoping it continues but he's notorious for having excuses about why he needs to pay late so I added a $10/day late fee this month. I told dh the other day that if an infant came along that I could replace them with I would! Low and behold I got an email yesterday for a 5 day a week 7 month old, word of mouth referral from a mom who interviewed me and didn't choose me. ( :confused: isn't that a little weird?) Plus I would be able to charge a little more and get the extra day of care in there and have a consistent M-F schedule. I originally considered keeping her and sending my DS who's 8 and still counts in my #s to summer camp to stay in ratio but I have a new 3.5yr old starting who may or may not be here for the summer so I can't really count on that. Plus it's a LOT of money!

Is that mean? I love DCG to pieces but her dad drives me up the wall. Every time I talk to him I grit my teeth and think in my head "just shut up!!!" I don't even know that this baby will even work out but if it did I would like to term the other DCG. She's going to be 2 in Aug, DCD thinks she's brilliant... she's cute but I wouldn't say brilliant or even advanced TBH... She can't even talk yet. I have a feeling that they're going to put her in a preschool setting in the next year anyway. This baby would potentially be in my care longer since they're only 7 months old. Am I crazy?!? Is this just cruel?

[coolconfidentme]

Re-interview the baby again & discuss long term care, etc. If you feel its a good fit to your program then term. I have termed based solely on a parent before & never regretted it.

[spud912]

Can you take the 7 month old in addition to the dcg you currently have without going over-ratio? If so, I would take in the 7 month old to see if he/she is a good fit for your program. If he/she is a great fit (and the parents follow policies), then I would term the dcg. I would keep the reasons as brief as possible.

I hope I helped! I have a similar issue I posted in the private forum .

[BumbleBee]

I "termed" (helped them leave actually) because of a parent (1 parent of a dual parent household. The other parent was decent). The kids had nothing to do with it.

[TwinKristi]

No I can't keep both. I considered it originally because there would only be a few days I would be over and if I sent my 8yr old to camp he would free up one spot but still too many infants to keep both and take this 3.5yr old and it would cost $90-140/wk to do that, not really worth it to me and would limit me to 6 kids, I have a 2yr old and 8yr old so 7 would be preferred to 6. Plus the rotating day could throw things off. I got a call for a 3.5yr old today who needs FT care ASAP and we know how hard it is to find 3.5yr olds FT. She may or may not be long term, we're not sure. She can go to a new preschool in June but mom doesn't want to switch her if she is happy here so we'll see. But with what I already have and the 3.5yr old I would rather term the DCG I have because of the Dad. He's just beyond annoying and has an awful schedule. I mean, I shouldn't complain because it's only 6hrs a day, 5 in the summer, but he picks up at nap time and it's such a pain!! I know some of you don't even accommodate that but I really needed to fill the spot when they called and it wasn't a big deal at first but now that I know DCD it's a problem. I never know whether I need to wake her up at 1:40 or let her sleep til she wakes up and text him. It's just annoying and now everything annoys me even more every day. Like I said, I told myself if someone else came along I would term and replace her and now it's a possibility and I feel bad!

[midaycare]

Without knowing the long term possibility of the 7 month old, I would probably send my son to a few camps in June and see how things go. If it's a good fit, term the other child. But that's me ... I just wouldn't like to lose a sure thing for a family that may or may not work out long term.

At least the hours are pretty great with the annoying dcd!

[llpa]

Is there any way you can get dcd to commit to a better schedule? At least staying thru nap each day she is there? That would annoy me completely! TBH I would reinterview the 7mo and if you get no heebie jeebies from the interview, i would take the 7mo old and let dcg go. I know it's a crapshoot but I would take the chance.

[spinnymarie]

That's what I would do - offer Dad the full-time spot, with no nap time pick-ups, and say that you have another offer of full-time with a better schedule so if he can accommodate, awesome, if not, you will have to replace. That should please your conscience a little

[Blackcat31]

Issues with payment are usually the ONLY reason I term.

I despise having to chase my paycheck and decided a few years back that I would no longer play that game.

Once is an exception, more than once is down right rude and NOT the type of client I want to keep. NO matter how good their child is....

Timely payments are NON-NEGOTIABLE.

Period.


Take the infant and tell late paying dad that he is out.

[Kabob]

I agree. I put up with way too much myself but not getting paid on time would be the straw that broke the camel's back. I would totally take a consistent family and replace a problem one any time...

[melilley]

It really sounds like you know what you want to do I know, easier said than done though.
The late payments would bother me. I don't get how people think that it's OK to pay the person who takes care of their child late. I'm sure other bills are paid on time!

I have one dcm who I cannot stand, I sometimes wish she would do something so I could term, with a good conscience anyways. She's not mean or anything, just down right annoying it's not just me either, she has made comments about what others have said to her, about her. ..get a clue...

[Maria2013]

Re-interview the baby again & discuss long term care, etc. If you feel its a good fit to your program then term. I have termed based solely on a parent before & never regretted it.

[TwinKristi]

Thanks ladies, the 7mo's parents wanted to come tonight at SEVEN PM!!! I mean I get it, they both work and such but sheesh... I'm not game for interviews that late in the day. I told her maybe we can work something out next week. I have a nasty headache today and it's been all I could do to make it to now!! DCG in question went home, dad actually paid me ON TIME!! happyface But here we go again with not sure if she's coming tomorrow or not. I had an interview for a 3.5yr old today who starts Monday and that's either through June 6th or long term if she likes it here. Otherwise there are a few preschools who can accept her after the school year is out. We'll see.

I don't know if the 7 month old will even work out, but if they did I would have to term my current DCG... And offering the FT spot would almost be counter-productive because I would be forcing longer work hours at the same pay. Plus they live 40 mins away so he drops her off and picks her up since he works here. Mom works near their home. That's one of the communication issues. I don't even know if she'll be coming tomorrow... mom hasn't decided because she's been going on the potty at home. They have a work picnic but he doesn't really want to bring her and mess up her nap. LOL Plus I have calls for infants more than anything else. Plus if I take both DCGs and send my DS to camp, I won't have room for drop-ins or any kids over 2 and I know that sounds silly, but I have a few drop-in families I'd like to work with from time to time and adding an over 2 to the mix would be nice and the summer is usually the busiest for drop-ins with providers going on vacation.

Ugh, this is so tough. Being slow ****s, but something being full does too when you have to make choices like this. Like today I just had that twinge of guilt at pickup today when he actually had the check. I mean, I know it's because if he doesn't bring it tomorrow there's a $10 fee per day, doesn't come again til Monday so that's $30! LOL It got me paid on time but only because they're so inconsistent!!! Ugh!!

[MarinaVanessa]

Meh. I wouldn't feel guilty. I have a family that CONSISTENTLY comes and brings their kids sick (they have two and it's either one or the other) and I have to keep sending them home. The fever ALWAYS pops up either right before or right after nap. Hmmm. . He also has issues with forgetting to pay me on time, 4 times since they started in Jan.

I interviewed with a few family's for my last preschool spot but got a call from a woman that was pregnant and needs DC in August. I liked them, they like me, I told her to bring me a deposit. Right before August I'll give DCD a 2 week notice. I can handle them until then for the $$ without feeling overly stressed, I LOVE the kiddos I just don't like having my leg pulled ya know.

Not one ounce of remorse. I'm not telling them that I'm replacing them until I give them their 2 weeks notice. I'm so mean

[TwinKristi]

See, that's one of the things I'm worried about, I KNOW they'll ask why. And do I tell them there's someone who wants all 5 days and willing to pay more? I know I shouldn't feel guilty but I do... LOL Just a tiny bit though!