Parents Asking Leading Questions??

[cheerfuldom]

I have had the exact same issue here, especially with one girl and my own daughter. I dont get baited into a confrontation listing everything their kid did to my kid. I just keep my response similar each time

"Pam, thank you for bringing this to my attention. It is very normal for kids to squabble with one another and at this age, they are all working out what is appropriate in a group environment. As always, I do my best to deal with each situation as it comes, but I can't guarantee that anything will never happen within a group setting. If anything outside of an ordinary childhood squabble happens, I will definitely let you know. Please also keep in mind that the things any child tells us are often times not the full story or never happened at all. This is true of any child, not just yours"

Rinse, repeat. If they dont like my response or keep pushing it, I will gently remind them that if they are unhappy with the environment, they are always welcome to find new care. I had to do that recently and the complaints from Dad stopped. I really cannot worry about the million things a child could be telling their parents at home.

[sahm1225]

got child right now whom all winter told his mom I wouldn't let him put his coat on when we went outside and he got cold. The text/calls were always after 9 pm.....funny thing was most of those days we DID NOT go outside....now he is telling her he gets pepsi at lunch.....who needs the "here's you sign here"? :::::: She gets the "hand" to talk to by the look on my face when she arrives cause she realizes she is in survival mode now.

Pepsi?? Tell the dcm you are a coca cola household and soda is too expensive to share!

I agree w blackcat

[laceylmm]

Mom text me this morning that son doesn't want to come this week... Is this an appropriate response? Should it be more simple?


That's fine. I actually need next week to be Dcb last week as I have filled my remaining full time spot. Part time doesn't hold over full time. But from the sounds of it that might be best if Dcb is uncomfortable with coming. And best for ds as well so he isn't made to be a bully when both of them are hitting or not sharing occasionally. Typical behavior that needs lots of talking through and redirection but can be stressful to hear about nonetheless.

[NightOwl]

The last two sentences are a little confrontational, IMHO. But I also don't know the entire nature of your relationship with dcm. Looks like she's been somewhat confrontational herself, but should you stoop to her level? What you said is the truth, don't get me wrong. But I believe including those last two sentences will probably guarantee that dcb won't return at all. Which is probably a good thing.

[laceylmm]

It's just really hard for me to not be 'right'...our relationship hasn't been bad except for these passive aggressive comments that her son is sad. Or saying my son has hurt hers. Yes they squabble. My son has bit him one time. Any other hitting incidents, her son included, they have been over within two seconds.

Her son is probably seeking attention after being shipped to daycare within day of his new brother being born. He only comes mtwf 9-1.

It just irks me that it's being made out that her son is being beat up. That's so not the case. They play fine other than their fights. We deal with them and move on with the day. Unfortunately it seems mom and son have some kind of bonding going on over how sad he is...which is not how he acts here.

[laceylmm]

I also know she has no intention of paying for this week she is missing.

[Play Care]

I would then term effective immedialty. The fact she isn't sending her son because he doesn't want to go is a HUGE red flag. I would also be calling my licensor to let her know what's been going on.

I would send a professional term notice though - nothing passive aggressive etc. be the bigger person.

[laceylmm]

She's private pay.

[TheGoodLife]

You need to either tell her in writing that you are giving two weeks term notice, or ask for her 2 weeks, and quote your term notice with pay- so you have something in writing in case you have to fight for the money she owes. I would not add anything about the 2 not getting along, either, in case she wants to try to fight it and make it look like her son was being hurt or something.

[Cradle2crayons]

I also know she has no intention of paying for this week she is missing.

I assume you have a policy regarding terms? Do parents have to give two weeks paid written notice? If so, I would respond only with...

"Dcm, Consider this your two weeks notice of end of care. You balance is $xxx and is due on xxx or late fees in the amount too xxx will be due and owning. A written copy of his can be picked up during normal daycare business hours."

[Naptime yet?]

I also know she has no intention of paying for this week she is missing.

I would count this as week 1 of her deposit, then.