Do You Ever....

[childcaremom]

sit and question your program when an interviewing family doesn't choose your program.... even if you had decided that they weren't a good fit?

I had an interview on Friday. The family and child were very sweet but I knew they weren't a good fit for a number of reasons: no back up if I am closed or child is sick, adamant about potty training at 18 months (child is 12 months and not walking or talking), very overprotective (gripped their child into a protective stance when I explained how I handle/document injuries, etc), changed and extended their hours from our previous discussion, had never played outside with their child (I advertise as an 'outdoor as much as possible' program), and, most importantly, had never left the child with anyone. Ever.

So I knew we were not a good fit, at all, and yet when they sent an email to say that they found a program and signed a contract, I was a little upset. Even though when they left, I commented to my husband: "Why would they have even wanted to come for an interview?"

Normal? Crazy? I need to get out more?

[TickleMonster]

Ive often wondered why some families dont choose our program here but I dont let it worry or upset me anymore. Ive just adopted the saying "If its meant to be, it will be". What is really nice is that they contacted you to let you know they found someone else. Ive never had a parent do that for me.

[NightOwl]

Loo. I think we tend to beat ourselves up for and over analyze every "rejection" because it feels personal, or maybe like an insult that we somehow aren't good enough for their flawless angel baby. That's mainly because we are women (mostly). So definitely normal. Also, their email telling you they went with another caregiver took the power away from you to do the rejecting. And no woman likes to be on the receiving end of rejection. We want to be on the giving end. Lol.

[KidGrind]

sit and question your program when an interviewing family doesn't choose your program.... even if you had decided that they weren't a good fit?

I had an interview on Friday. The family and child were very sweet but I knew they weren't a good fit for a number of reasons: no back up if I am closed or child is sick, adamant about potty training at 18 months (child is 12 months and not walking or talking), very overprotective (gripped their child into a protective stance when I explained how I handle/document injuries, etc), changed and extended their hours from our previous discussion, had never played outside with their child (I advertise as an 'outdoor as much as possible' program), and, most importantly, had never left the child with anyone. Ever.

So I knew we were not a good fit, at all, and yet when they sent an email to say that they found a program and signed a contract, I was a little upset. Even though when they left, I commented to my husband: "Why would they have even wanted to come for an interview?"

Normal? Crazy? I need to get out more?

I do not get why you’d be upset when you clearly knew they weren’t the right fit. If it were me I’d be thankful and respect parents who recognize my program or I am not a right fit for their child & needs. It safes me time & energy.

This business is a two way street we can choose & decline and they can choose & decline. It’s not personal. You were not the right fit for them. They weren’t the right fit for you. It’s a win win. They saved you a headache.

When a family doesn’t go with my program I don’t not question my program. I think they made the best decision for their wants/needs and I wasn’t it.

I am in a consistent mode of self evaluation & improving my program, never based off of an interview.

[Shell]

Yes! I had an interview 1.5 weeks ago where the mom was a nervous wreck -biting her nails, eyeing her child like a hawk, saying she wouldn't take her daughter outside since I didn't have a fence ( I am not required to and live on a dead end). She also said her daughter was kicked out of daycare after one day The thing is, her daughter could have benefitted from my structured program. Well, she couldn't get past the no fence despite all my reassurance. Made me question my whole outdoor area -which is beautiful btw. Next week, I signed on a girl and her mom was very impressed with the program and outdoor area.

[llpa]

I think we question ourselves sometimes even when we know it isn't for the best because it is OUR thoughts and hopes that go into our programs and our businesses. It is a business we created and therefore very personal i have tried to train myself to not take it personally. My program is set a certain way because I believe that children learn thru play. Because I believe children need outside play and naptime etc etc. If my client chooses to go elsewhere then they may not accept what I believe to be important for children, and we would prob have had issues in the end.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I think we question ourselves sometimes even when we know it isn't for the best because it is OUR thoughts and hopes that go into our programs and our businesses. It is a business we created and therefore very personal i have tried to train myself to not take it personally. My program is set a certain way because I believe that children learn thru play. Because I believe children need outside play and naptime etc etc. If my client chooses to go elsewhere then they may not accept what I believe to be important for children, and we would prob have had issues in the end.

Very, very true. happyface

[cheerfuldom]

Loo. I think we tend to beat ourselves up for and over analyze every "rejection" because it feels personal, or maybe like an insult that we somehow aren't good enough for their flawless angel baby. That's mainly because we are women (mostly). So definitely normal. Also, their email telling you they went with another caregiver took the power away from you to do the rejecting. And no woman likes to be on the receiving end of rejection. We want to be on the giving end. Lol.

I agree with this.

I had one mom recently pull her daughter before the two weeks trial period. Her child was extremely spoiled, princess type although I think I could have made it work with time. However, mom was not adjusting to group care and just was this crazy mixture of neglectful yet overbearing. I think she wanted a certain level of care but it wasn't anything she would give herself and wanted her daughter in nanny style care for long hours, which I wouldnt do. They ended up going with a Grandma that was just caring for two or three kids. I dont at all believe it was the right move for the child, but it made mom feel better. Definitely rubbed me the wrong way because who likes rejection? but when I am logical, I know that this mom would have escalated further and become someone I wouldnt want to work with anyway.

[grandmom]

You can't be all things to every family. Choose your niche and stay there. To me it's like Nannyde's FREE issue. If you try to serve someone outside your niche, you fail, they fail, it's just not worth it.

So if you knew it wasn't a good fit, be glad that they thought so too.

Next interview please.....