I Have a Confession

[NightOwl]

That I fibbed to dcps. Their dcg2 is sick, coughing so hard she nearly threw up, couldn't catch her breath, sounded like she desperately needed a breathing treatment (or 15). They are the type who don't take dcg to the Dr unless she's at death's door.

Sooooo.... I fibbed. I text dcps yesterday and said that dcg had puked from coughing when she actually hadn't. It was close to happening, but didn't. I just can't stand to see her so pitiful and suffering. She's such a sweet little thing and I hate seeing her struggling to take a deep breath without going into a spasm of coughing/choking on mucous. I don't think she's contagious, I think it's allergies or something similar, but she needed medical care. Her lungs were thick with mucous and a rattling, choking cough.

I feel bad, but not, because they took her to the Dr. I'm waiting to see if she comes today and to find out what Dr said. She'll be here, if she's coming, in about half an hour. So feel free to judge me because I'm already judging myself. But at least she got the medical care she needed.

[Naptime yet?]

It was for the sake of the child, don't feel bad. Some parents need a kick in the rumpus.

[sahm1225]

It's for the better of the child. And if you waited long enough, she would've puked from the coughing. Poor baby

[melilley]

Don sounds like dcg was really sick. Don't beat yourself up about it! It I have a parent just like yours. I don't get it, but they also won't take dcb to the doctor unless he is on deaths door either. Sometimes parents need a nudge to take them in.

Give us an update!

[NightOwl]

Just got here, double ear infections and a touch of bronchitis! She has antibiotics and couch meds. I feel slightly justified now.

[llpa]

I agree with everyone else... If it is for the good of everyone involved, especially dcg, then she needs to see a Dr. Geez poor kid! Same parents would prob be at Dr. For themselves at the first sign of a sniffle!

[CraftyMom]

Just got here, double ear infections and a touch of bronchitis! She has antibiotics and couch meds. I feel slightly justified now.

I'm glad you did it! Sometimes a little fib is necessary to make dcp's wake up!

Poor dcg could use a day at home today!

[NightOwl]

I agree about needing a day to rest, but she's not contagious so i wouldn't be justified in sending her home. She plays well, just gets these coughing fits where everything must stop until she gets it under control. It's pitiful. And I don't feel bad for fibbing anymore!

[cheerfuldom]

So you took her this morning? I would have insisted she stay home. She sounds horribly ill and even while not contagious, she doesnt need to be at daycare.

[NightOwl]

Yes, I took her. They're the sort of family where i get the feeling the child gets better care here than at home, ya know? And since she isn't contagious and plays well, despite the coughing fits, I didn't see a problem with it.

[Blackcat31]

I am glad they brought her to the doctor. I feel bad that you had to fib to get them to do it.

I understand but hate the fact that parents may feel as though this is something common with provider's kwim?

In the future, don't be afraid to just stand up and say "Hey, mom/dad this childs behavior tells me she needs to see a Dr. She will NOT be allowed to return to care until she has seen one just so I know there are no underlying issues."

I have a rule/policy that if a child is under the weather or not up to par for xx amount of days that I reserve the right to require a Dr's visit just to be sure.

Sounds like that may have been the same situation.... not sick enough to exclude (no fever etc) but still sick enough that YOU know something is probably wrong.

NOT trying to make you feel worse about having to fib but just trying to offer you a Plan B for the next time you are in this situation.

[NightOwl]

I am glad they brought her to the doctor. I feel bad that you had to fib to get them to do it.

I understand but hate the fact that parents may feel as though this is something common with provider's kwim?

In the future, don't be afraid to just stand up and say "Hey, mom/dad this childs behavior tells me she needs to see a Dr. She will NOT be allowed to return to care until she has seen one just so I know there are no underlying issues."

I have a rule/policy that if a child is under the weather or not up to par for xx amount of days that I reserve the right to require a Dr's visit just to be sure.

Sounds like that may have been the same situation.... not sick enough to exclude (no fever etc) but still sick enough that YOU know something is probably wrong.

NOT trying to make you feel worse about having to fib but just trying to offer you a Plan B for the next time you are in this situation.

Thank you. I will definitely keep that in mind. I may add that to my policies too, about requiring a Dr visit when child is under the weather but not ill enough to exclude.

[SilverSabre25]

Thank you. I will definitely keep that in mind. I may add that to my policies too, about requiring a Dr visit when child is under the weather but not ill enough to exclude.

What I would do is reword your illness policy to make "severe cough, bad enough to interfere with regular activity/cause child to vomit/"junky" cough/etc" an excludable thing. And add wording about "Depending on severity of symptoms I may require a doctor's note [with specifics about what it needs to say, BC or C2C has a good one] before readmitting child to care"

[SignMeUp]

my policy...

...has a few specifics that I exclude for. Plus a standard (I think!) "or not well enough to participate in normal childcare activities" sentence. Plus, "If you aren't sure, call me and we'll figure it out together." That gives me veto rights, especially since the parent is often by the child as we talk, and I can hear them coughing, sneezing, wheezing or whining.

And I call one little section my "oozing" policy. That's not in writing, but it's how I explain it to parents when we register Usually at that point they are thinking of "someone else's kid" and agree to it Basically if dck is "oozing" from anywhere (eyes, ears, mouth, nose, bottom) they should remain at home.

Of course it gets a bit subjective when it's a cold, but when it's frequent wiping or uncontrollable down-to-the-mouth snot, that is oozing

[My3cents]

I am glad they brought her to the doctor. I feel bad that you had to fib to get them to do it.

I understand but hate the fact that parents may feel as though this is something common with provider's kwim?

In the future, don't be afraid to just stand up and say "Hey, mom/dad this childs behavior tells me she needs to see a Dr. She will NOT be allowed to return to care until she has seen one just so I know there are no underlying issues."

I have a rule/policy that if a child is under the weather or not up to par for xx amount of days that I reserve the right to require a Dr's visit just to be sure.

Sounds like that may have been the same situation.... not sick enough to exclude (no fever etc) but still sick enough that YOU know something is probably wrong.

NOT trying to make you feel worse about having to fib but just trying to offer you a Plan B for the next time you are in this situation.

I thought this way too~ No need to fib. Just tell it like it is. I need a note from the Dr. to rule out any underlying illness going on. I agree she should have stayed home- give her a chance to recoop. You can't take it on that the child gets better care when with you, because the reality of it is that the child belongs to the parents. I do hear you, but hope your hearing me too- This will save your sanity in the long run.

best-