No.. It's Not Ok.. (Small Vent)

[Mister Sir Husband]

So I take my own kids to a store and one of them while I am shopping starts running in circles around a display. I tell him to please stop and stand with me until I am finished, and the store clerk who over heard me stops and says "oh, its ok.. he's fine"

Well excuse me, but no he's not. This is my child and I am trying to teach him to behave himself in public and don't need someone I don't know telling him it's ok to run around the store.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Did ya tell them that? I would have. ::

[Sugar Magnolia]

Totally!

[Play Care]

This was one of my HUGE pet peeves when my children were younger (now that they are older and not as "cute":: it doesn't happen::::

[CraftyMom]

What they were doing at the moment may seem ok, but knowing how my own kids are it probably would have escalated to some other horse play or running off down the aisle or knocking down the whole display. Not to mention you can't concentrate on what you're doing because your mind is on the kids' behavior.

[Starburst]

If I was the store clerk I wouldn't have said it was okay. A few years ago when I worked at an arts and crafts store it always annoyed me when parents let their kids run a muck and acting as if it were cute. One night when I was working, there were two older boys (between 8-10) who kept running around the back of the store bumping into employees and the manager on duty (who was also a football mom at my high school), other employees, and I all told them multiple times "No running in the store". Eventually the manager told the boys that if they didn't stop she was going to find their parents and have the mall security escort all of them out of the store; we didn't catch them running after that. ::

But good job, MSH! One of my biggest pet peeves is when parents don't correct misbehavior in public, or even worst, condone it by bribing the child or giving in to what they want just so the child won't throw a tantrum and so that they look like (what they consider to be) "the good parent". The mom of the kid I watch does that sometimes, though lately she's been a little better at setting boundaries for him since he's close to starting preschool.

[mountainside13]

I dislike it when I am trying to redirect my children and someone steps in and says it's ok. Very irritating.

[LadyPearl]

Sounds like my mother-in-law.....

[drseuss]

Sometimes I think people who say that kind of thing are people pleasers and they don't want you to feel badly about your child's behavior. They should mind their own beeswax, though...

I have had the children's librarian say that to me when I am trying to teach both my own children and my daycare children how to behave in the library. "They're fine!" No, they're not fine. Have the rules changed, or what? It's okay to run around hooting and hollering in the library now?

[Oss_cc]

Sometimes I think people who say that kind of thing are people pleasers and they don't want you to feel badly about your child's behavior. They should mind their own beeswax, though...

I have had the children's librarian say that to me when I am trying to teach both my own children and my daycare children how to behave in the library. "They're fine!" No, they're not fine. Have the rules changed, or what? It's okay to run around hooting and hollering in the library now?

Totally. I'm sure I said that at least once when I was younger (pre-kids of my own) and working retail. Just a people pleaser thing, and naivety. Though I doubt I ever said it about running around.

[sahm1225]

Sometimes I think people who say that kind of thing are people pleasers and they don't want you to feel badly about your child's behavior. They should mind their own beeswax, though...

I have had the children's librarian say that to me when I am trying to teach both my own children and my daycare children how to behave in the library. "They're fine!" No, they're not fine. Have the rules changed, or what? It's okay to run around hooting and hollering in the library now?

I have to admit that that's something I would've said when I was working at an office. Usually it was when a parent is obviously flustered with their child and embarrassed. I will usually say something like 'it's okay, we know your little one has lots of energy.' And then offer the kid crayons or something. No one ever gave me dirty looks about it

[My3cents]

I dislike it when I am trying to redirect my children and someone steps in and says it's ok. Very irritating.

this happened to me recently. My daughter was arguing with me over something I had and she thought she was going to get from me. I had told her no before going in and no twice inside, and then I was loud with her about it. A lady trying to be "nice" jumped in and said oh I have extra in my car- I was livid. I said oh no Thank you, my daughter knew she crossed the line with me and told the lady oh no thanks. Yes my daughter heard about it when we got done. I was so livid with her. She was just pushing and thought because we were in public she could get her own way. Wrong answer~ I was upset with lady for not minding her business but in truth she had no idea of where I was coming from with my teenager and just trying to be helpful.

[Kelly]

I frequently get that response about my son who is 24 years old and has Down Syndrome. As if he is being held to lower expectations and that having DS makes it ok for him not to behave in public. He does have behavioral issues and OCD but these will never get better if he is always being told that it's okay. (That and the idea that all people with DS are "angels" and "so sweet and loving"--ha!)

[spinnymarie]

I try not to let these things get to me - I would generally understand someone saying 'they're fine' to mean 'this is not bothering ME, or THIS PLACE, so don't worry on account of us.' I try to appreciate the fact that this person is understanding of having small children
Now, that said, I also continue directing my children in the way that I see fit.

[WImom]

I would have told him that it wasn't okay as well. I hate when others tell me how to parent.


You could have waited until he walked away, secretly kicked the display over and then go up to him and say "See why it's NOT okay, now you have a mess to clean!!::