How Do I Word This?

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  • Kabob
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jun 2013
    • 1106

    How Do I Word This?

    So...2 of my 3 families are starting to freak out about me being pregnant. I'm due the first week of June but I secretly think it'll be sooner. I was early with ds.

    Anyway. They both just asked out of the blue when I'm due again. Then they both asked how long I'll be closed. I told them again that most likely it will be 2 weeks unless something comes up (I had an easy delivery before but who knows). One dcm started to freak out about how she'll be a whole 2 weeks without daycare and she can't plan for it. I tried to tell her that maybe she could arrange drop in care with another daycare (the local centers all offer it) or maybe ask a friend or relative but she was super upset. I understand her worry but still...I was surprised how worried she was...both her and the other inquiring family aren't even full time...they use 2-3 days a week on average although the dcm that was freaking is here from open to close. I also won't be charging for the time I'm closed. Originally I was just going to be closed 1 week by dh freaked out about that and said it wasn't enough. He still thinks 2 weeks isn't enough.

    So no matter what I do someone is unhappy.

    How do I word a letter to update everyone on my plan? Or just reassure everyone? Or something? I don't know what else to say...

    I was planning to give everyone an update the end of April so that they have a month to figure things out for sure. By then I should have my assistant/sub trained and ready to help as needed too.

    I really am trying not to complicate this...
  • CraftyMom
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jan 2014
    • 2285

    #2
    How much notice did they have that you were pregnant and would be taking 2 weeks off? I'm sure it was plenty, even telling them today would be plenty of notice!

    Some people are very self involved. They will live.

    How dare you get pregnant without first consulting your PT daycare parents! ::::::::::

    Comment

    • Kabob
      Daycare.com Member
      • Jun 2013
      • 1106

      #3
      Originally posted by CraftyMom
      How much notice did they have that you were pregnant and would be taking 2 weeks off? I'm sure it was plenty, even telling them today would be plenty of notice!

      Some people are very self involved. They will live.

      How dare you get pregnant without first consulting your PT daycare parents! ::::::::::
      I told them back in December and again when they asked in January and again each time I enrolled a new family (because dcm was surprised I was enrolling families while pregnant). One dcm is actually upset that I'm even considering an assistant but wants my assistant/sub to keep the daycare open while I'm with new baby. :confused: I told her the plan back in December...it hasn't changed.

      Comment

      • Play Care
        Daycare.com Member
        • Dec 2012
        • 6642

        #4
        Maybe I'm being crabby but I would send out something reiterating your plans along with something stating that they need to make their plans and allow you to enjoy and look forward to your impending arrival. Obviously owning your own business (and one that being reliable is key) means that you have to tread carefully, but two weeks is not a lot of time to have to accommodate. I'd have very little patience for the repeated questioning.

        Comment

        • Kabob
          Daycare.com Member
          • Jun 2013
          • 1106

          #5
          Originally posted by Play Care
          Maybe I'm being crabby but I would send out something reiterating your plans along with something stating that they need to make their plans and allow you to enjoy and look forward to your impending arrival. Obviously owning your own business (and one that being reliable is key) means that you have to tread carefully, but two weeks is not a lot of time to have to accommodate. I'd have very little patience for the repeated questioning.
          I'm trying super hard to be patient. I don't want to come off as rude in my update letter. And I'm not sure when I should send that letter out. I've been telling them the plan verbally almost every month after I announced my pregnancy and plans in writing in December. I know I need to be reliable. So far I haven't taken any time off due to my pregnancy. Not even for dr appts.

          Comment

          • CraftyMom
            Daycare.com Member
            • Jan 2014
            • 2285

            #6
            I forgot to answer your question

            I would just send them a repeated copy of what you already told them adding "just a reminder, the time is getting closer, be sure to get your back up plans in action as I will be taking at least 2 weeks off, depending on how smoothly things go. I'm sure you all understand, being moms yourselves and having given birth that not everything goes as planned. I'm sure you also understand the importance of recovery time for mom, bonding time for mom and baby and adjustment for the entire family"

            I have 3 kids but have not given birth while I my daycare. In my opinion 2 weeks is not long enough! My last recovery was unexpectedly my worst, no way I could have had dck's here after 2 weeks!

            Comment

            • Play Care
              Daycare.com Member
              • Dec 2012
              • 6642

              #7
              Originally posted by Kabob
              I'm trying super hard to be patient. I don't want to come off as rude in my update letter. And I'm not sure when I should send that letter out. I've been telling them the plan verbally almost every month after I announced my pregnancy and plans in writing in December. I know I need to be reliable. So far I haven't taken any time off due to my pregnancy. Not even for dr appts.
              My motto is "no good deed goes unpunished" (yes I am crabby!: but you can see what all your careful planning to minimize their inconvenience has wrought - they are still complaining... Don't get me wrong, I've been at this for ten years so I understand it's a fine line. But I also think you need to do what's best for you and your family and let the chips fall where they may. I do like crafty moms wording - much nicer then my original thought!::

              Comment

              • Kabob
                Daycare.com Member
                • Jun 2013
                • 1106

                #8
                Originally posted by Play Care
                My motto is "no good deed goes unpunished" (yes I am crabby!: but you can see what all your careful planning to minimize their inconvenience has wrought - they are still complaining... Don't get me wrong, I've been at this for ten years so I understand it's a fine line. But I also think you need to do what's best for you and your family and let the chips fall where they may. I do like crafty moms wording - much nicer then my original thought!::
                Lol thanks. I originally felt bad inconveniencing them but after some thought I realized that I'm not gonna sacrifice my family only to have them complain or leave anyway. It wouldn't be so bad getting a couple of new families in to replace them if they leave as they both aren't full time and I wouldn't mind the lighter load for a bit. Trying to be positive. Just ****s when you're trying to make it work for everyone. It's not their fault I'm pregnant but on the other hand I don't want to apologize for having a family...

                Comment

                • daycare
                  Advanced Daycare.com *********
                  • Feb 2011
                  • 16259

                  #9
                  I see that you will have a sub or assistant, will they be able to help the families out at all?

                  I would not bring it up again. You have answered it more than enough times. I would do as planned and just send out 1 last friendly reminder to all of the parents and leave it at that. it is their responsibility to make back up arrangements.

                  I honestly don't think that two weeks is a very long time, so they can deal AND if they are so upset about it that you decided to extend your family then they are not the ones you want anyways and let them go.

                  Congrats on the new arrival....:hug:

                  Comment

                  • KIDZRMYBIZ
                    Daycare.com Member
                    • Jun 2013
                    • 672

                    #10
                    I would send out an update that states only the facts with due date (everyone knows baby is most likely not going to come on the exact date), my plan for 2 weeks off (everyone knows that sometimes a C-section or other complication can delay a swift recovery for mom), and whatever my plan was if I was having an assistant come in or whatever. To me, any more elaboration sounds like I am trying to convince them it will be ok, asking them for their approval, or offering to help them find alternative care while I am closed because I have inconvenienced them so, which I most definitely AM NOT.

                    These people absolutely know what's what. THEY chose an in-home daycare with a mama of child-bearing years, and they most certainly know what to expect and fully understand that it is their responsibility to work around all of it, especially when you have given much notice and plan for minimal time off. But they are gonna whine, B!tch, p1ss, and moan anyway. We all know that.

                    Daycare is tough on a pregnant or mama-to-infant provider. We don't get a 6-12 week LOA, not unless we want to start our whole business over. It's too bad they can't see that.

                    Good luck!

                    Comment

                    • KiddieCahoots
                      FCC Educator
                      • Mar 2014
                      • 1349

                      #11
                      Don't know if this could help, but maybe on your last notice, have them sign and date it, and give them the copy. So it kinda turns the tables right back at them, to be their responsibility to be prepared and get that back up ready! Said and done...kwim?

                      Comment

                      • CraftyMom
                        Daycare.com Member
                        • Jan 2014
                        • 2285

                        #12
                        Originally posted by KiddieCahoots
                        Don't know if this could help, but maybe on your last notice, have them sign and date it, and give them the copy. So it kinda turns the tables right back at them, to be their responsibility to be prepared and get that back up ready! Said and done...kwim?
                        Oh yes, this!

                        I have my dcp sign for every notice I give them, avoids the "oh I didn't get that notice" bull...

                        Comment

                        • Kabob
                          Daycare.com Member
                          • Jun 2013
                          • 1106

                          #13
                          Thanks! I'm feeling better about it now...it's hard not to take it personally since it is such a personal matter...

                          I think I'll send the final update in April to give them a month to finalize their plans...even if I'm early they should still have a month to plan even if they didn't plan back when I told them months ago.

                          Surprisingly my newest family of 3 hasn't said a word about my pregnancy. When I told dcm at the interview that I'm pregnant, she didn't bat an eye. She and dcd both work at home running their own businesses so they seem to not be worried about it.

                          If I have to start over then at least it will be during prime enrollment time in the summer.

                          Comment

                          • preschoolteacher
                            Daycare.com Member
                            • Apr 2013
                            • 935

                            #14
                            He WANTS to get bit!

                            One DCG has a history of biting, though she hasn't in about 2 months. I think she's outgrowing it. The only kid she ever bit was my 20-month old son. Well now suddenly, every time they want the same toy and a conflict begins, he puts his hand up to her mouth--wanting her to bite him! She hasn't yet since I've seen each interaction and stopped it quickly. But, come on kid!

                            I never over-reacted to her biting, I don't think. But I think he's doing this to get my attention. The last time he did it, I led him away from her and the toy.

                            What would you do??

                            Comment

                            • preschoolteacher
                              Daycare.com Member
                              • Apr 2013
                              • 935

                              #15
                              That was supposed to be a new post. I'll move it when I'm on my computer. Oops!!

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