Is There A Way To Politely Tell Them To Leave The Older Sibling In The Car?

[crazydaycarelady]

Older 5yo brother comes in and immediately starts RUNNING around the table. Then they head towards the door but grab some of my liter of puppies (I am fostering them) toys and start squeezing the squeakers like a maniac, scaring the pups. Its 5:30........just pick up your kid and go.

I'll never understand. Don't they want to just get home? Why do they do things to drag out the pick-up like talking and bringing in the older sibs, especially when they are going to have to beg, plead, and bribe the older one to leave!

[hwichlaz]

It's not safe to leave him in the car, but I'd have a discussion with them about the rules of your house and since he can't behave they must keep hold of him the entire time they are there. Or you'll start meeting them at the door with their youngest so they don't need to come inside at all.

[Blackcat31]

I tell ALL my parents that ONLY the legal parent/guardian and the enrolled child are covered under my insurance policy so any older siblings, friends and/or relatives that accompany them to pick up MUST remain in the car.

If mom doesn't want to leave the older one in the car unattended, tell her to text you before she arrives to pick up and you will have DCK get ready so she is only required to run to the door and grab him.

[daycare]

Check with your state rules. It is against the law to leave a child in a vehicle for any reason under the age of 15.

I had a huge issue with this last year. Make them wait on the porch.

[nannyde]

They don't want to go home. They love the experience of being able to unleash the older one so they can have a free and fun time watching him get three kinds of crazy on your clock and at your expense.

There are so so so many parents who LOVE to have their kids get wild and crazy in public. They wish they could act like that and have that much fun. They adore seeing it and they really like not having to do anything but be in the audience. They want their kid to have a blast for free and seeing it makes them happy.

Tell them he can't come in. Just tell them the truth. I have three kids with older sibs and they don't bring them in at all. When the kids started I met them but did not let them past the front door. If I had toys or fun stuff out the kids would naturally want to come in and play. I have a normal living room with NOTHING for kids. This keeps any temptation at bay.

[Blackcat31]

Check with your state rules. It is against the law to leave a child in a vehicle for any reason under the age of 15.

I had a huge issue with this last year. Make them wait on the porch.

Wasn't it you guys (Cali providers) that have to count ANYONE on your property in your ratios?

I recall this being an issue for someone last year about a DCM bringing other kids with her and how that put the provider over ratios so she had to figure out a way to have parents NOT bring other kids unless there was an adult to wait in car with them...

I can't recall all the details but I thought the provider was in Cali.

[Michelle]

It doesn't count at pick up time and parent is present
but good point
Now if the provider had a half dozen friends over during the day hanging out with all their kids and the providers daycare kids... then yes that would be over capacity.
Kids in car alone?
absolute no no!!!
not even for a minute

[Margarete]

Wasn't it you guys (Cali providers) that have to count ANYONE on your property in your ratios?

I recall this being an issue for someone last year about a DCM bringing other kids with her and how that put the provider over ratios so she had to figure out a way to have parents NOT bring other kids unless there was an adult to wait in car with them...

I can't recall all the details but I thought the provider was in Cali.

I asked about this from my licensing rep.
Specifically I asked about kids in care siblings coming over with parents (who are allowed to come in any time)
Birthday party, family gatherings, holiday parties, are other situations where I may have more children at my home then I'm licensed for

I was told that these are a non-issue as they are not in your care (also do not need all the associated paperwork that would require), and they have another adult responsible for them. That doesn't mean that another rep wouldn't have a different answer though.... I should verify with my current one, as mine has changed since I asked.

[crazydaycarelady]

If he were to stay in the car he would be in his car seat. Also I live in a rural area so there is no traffic, kidnappers, or anything around.

I guess it annoys me that these parents are putting me in the position to now have to discipline/reprimand their child after already doing that with 12 other kids all day. Where has the common sense gone?

[daycare]

Wasn't it you guys (Cali providers) that have to count ANYONE on your property in your ratios?

I recall this being an issue for someone last year about a DCM bringing other kids with her and how that put the provider over ratios so she had to figure out a way to have parents NOT bring other kids unless there was an adult to wait in car with them...

I can't recall all the details but I thought the provider was in Cali.

it does not count if the parent is here and can take them home right away. HOWEVER, we are responsible for any chlid that is on our property should they get hurt. Actually any person that gets hurt on our property is our responsibility. I don't allow siblings not enrolled into my home. they can wait on the porch

[daycare]

I asked about this from my licensing rep.
Specifically I asked about kids in care siblings coming over with parents (who are allowed to come in any time)
Birthday party, family gatherings, holiday parties, are other situations where I may have more children at my home then I'm licensed for

I was told that these are a non-issue as they are not in your care (also do not need all the associated paperwork that would require), and they have another adult responsible for them. That doesn't mean that another rep wouldn't have a different answer though.... I should verify with my current one, as mine has changed since I asked.

I have to laugh. I was told NO, we can not be over for parties and what not. that if they come and it is obvious that it is NOT a pick up then we will be sited.

cali rule number 1 ALWAYS CHECK WITH YOUR ANALYST NO MATTER WHAT

[daycare]

If he were to stay in the car he would be in his car seat. Also I live in a rural area so there is no traffic, kidnappers, or anything around.

I guess it annoys me that these parents are putting me in the position to now have to discipline/reprimand their child after already doing that with 12 other kids all day. Where has the common sense gone?

IT IS also a safety issue. what if the child gets out of his seat and wonders off or gets out of the seat and another parent does not see the child when pulling up and hits them. I know these sound far fetched, but I believe that children should always be kept under supervision, especially the naughty ones...

[daycare]

last year I had an issue where a mom had two kids in my care that were sharing a full time spot. well the older kid was coming in with mom into the foyer and was being very naughty. mom was not taking control of the behavior so I said she needs to have her wait outside while you are picking up the little sister.

so the next day that the little sister was getting picked up dcm left the older sis in the car just parked a a house over.

long story short, the older sister was kicking the car window and screaming at the top of her lungs let me out let me out, she had gotten out of her seat and the child locks where on the door so she could not open it. one of my neighbors was in her garage and heard this. I had no clue that the older sibling was in the car, dcm sometimes left her with the dad or neighbor when she picked up., it was late and was dark out.

well the next thing you know dcm goes to her car and no older daughter. I hear screaming and I run out of my house. sure enough my neighbor comes out of her house with the older daughter starting to walk towards my house. I don't know this neighbor at all, we have never talked. the neighbor then starts yelling at dcm telling her that she called the police that what she did was illegal and it got all blown out crazy......

anyways..............that family is no longer here. and I made all families sign a car saftey form my state that stated that they were NOT to leave any child in the car at all for any length of time in or out of sight.

No more kids are being left in the car, they wait on the porch.

[Margarete]

I have to laugh. I was told NO, we can not be over for parties and what not. that if they come and it is obvious that it is NOT a pick up then we will be sited.

cali rule number 1 ALWAYS CHECK WITH YOUR ANALYST NO MATTER WHAT

I am only currently licensed for 8 (6 under 5), with 2 of my own it wouldn't take much to be over. I really do need to check with my current analyst. If he's got the same answer as yours and I want to host a party I'll just have to send in one of the provider on vacation forms for the day, as it would be a licensed exempt event.

[Childminder]

I live in a rural area so there is no traffic, kidnappers, or anything around.

I lived in a rural area and thought that at one time, till my car was stolen from my garage, an escaped prisoner walked away from a "Trustee Camp" miles away and ended up in my front yard mid day, a drunk knocked on my door at 3am after getting in a fight at a bar 6 miles away and running through the swamps and woods between my house and the main road.

One child I had, aged four, was left in his car seat in the truck while his dad ran in for just that one minute. The next thing we know the truck is hanging from a fence off of an embankment because the boy got out, threw it out of gear and it rolled. We had a backhoe that had to be hooked on the truck and pull him up.

Please do not encourage the parents to leave the boy in the car! All kinds of things could happen and because it's on your property you could be held liable. The best idea would be to have the younger child ready and do a hand off at the door. If asked why, tell the parent the truth and that the disruption is just too difficult for all concerned.