Guilt Trip!

[LadyPearl]

So I'm pregnant but we haven't told anybody yet. I stupidly asked dcm what time or day works best for her because I need to schedule an appt. (My dr suggested a 1st trimester u/s because I have had complications in the past.) I ended waiting to talk to dcm so I had to schedule later than what my dr wanted and I wasn't able to accommodate dcm because the timing of the u/s needed to coincide with my dr's availability. Now I'm getting a guilt trip from dcm because she can't take that day off blah blah blah! I was actually thinking of telling dcm that I'm pregnant hoping that she would understand the situation but why should I have to do that?!! I think this is going to be a giant headache and I'm only 10 weeks along.

(This is now affecting dcm because she has changed her work schedule on me twice in the last 2 weeks. I would have been able to schedule just fine if she hadn't changed it a second time.)

[melilley]

I wouldn't tell her if you don't want to yet. It's her responsibility to have backup care, plus she's the one who changed her schedule on you.

Congrats by the way! happyface

[Crazy8]

lesson learned: schedule your appointments whenever you need to and then inform daycare families of the time you will be off/closing. Do not give them a say in the matter!
If you can get evening appointments at your ob/gyn I would try to do that when you can to avoid closing too often but sometimes that just won't be an option.

[LadyPearl]

lesson learned: schedule your appointments whenever you need to and then inform daycare families of the time you will be off/closing. Do not give them a say in the matter!
If you can get evening appointments at your ob/gyn I would try to do that when you can to avoid closing too often but sometimes that just won't be an option.

Lesson learned for sure! I can't get evening appts. The best I can do is late in the day as possible and see if my mil can be here.

[Blackcat31]

So I'm pregnant but we haven't told anybody yet. I stupidly asked dcm what time or day works best for her because I need to schedule an appt. (My dr suggested a 1st trimester u/s because I have had complications in the past.) I ended waiting to talk to dcm so I had to schedule later than what my dr wanted and I wasn't able to accommodate dcm because the timing of the u/s needed to coincide with my dr's availability. Now I'm getting a guilt trip from dcm because she can't take that day off blah blah blah! I was actually thinking of telling dcm that I'm pregnant hoping that she would understand the situation but why should I have to do that?!! I think this is going to be a giant headache and I'm only 10 weeks along.

(This is now affecting dcm because she has changed her work schedule on me twice in the last 2 weeks. I would have been able to schedule just fine if she hadn't changed it a second time.)

I would simply write up a short note to DCM and say:

While working with multiple families, I try my hardest to accommodate the schedules of all families enrolled. However, pleasing everyone all the time is impossible so I do require all families to have reliable backup for these occurrences. This was discussed and agreed upon during enrollment.

I understand that my upcoming appt time does not work well for you and I do apologize for the inconvenience, however I am giving ample notice time so that all families have time to arrange back up care.

Sincerely,

Provider.

[Shell]

Not to sound rude, but I have found some parents don't really care what goes on in our lives, as long as we are open, and they can get to work. I wouldn't tell dcm yet about your pregnancy, unless you want to.

What I did while pregnant, was to have my mom come in and cover for every single appointment. I only have one family that is inconsiderate, but I knew I would lose them if they had to make other arrangements monthly or weekly. I mostly made the appointments for nap time, so it was easier on my mom when she was covering.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Not to sound rude, but I have found some parents don't really care what goes on in our lives, as long as we are open, and they can get to work. I wouldn't tell dcm yet about your pregnancy, unless you want to.

What I did while pregnant, was to have my mom come in and cover for every single appointment. I only have one family that is inconsiderate, but I knew I would lose them if they had to make other arrangements monthly or weekly. I mostly made the appointments for nap time, so it was easier on my mom when she was covering.

I did the same and had appointments every 2 weeks during my first trimester.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

lesson learned: schedule your appointments whenever you need to and then inform daycare families of the time you will be off/closing. Do not give them a say in the matter!
If you can get evening appointments at your ob/gyn I would try to do that when you can to avoid closing too often but sometimes that just won't be an option.

For sure!

[Blackcat31]

Not to sound rude, but I have found some parents don't really care what goes on in our lives, as long as we are open, and they can get to work. I wouldn't tell dcm yet about your pregnancy, unless you want to.

That is true to a point for me.

I don't care what goes on in their lives either. As long as they show up on time and pay on time....kwim?

If I were a provider who was pregnant though, I would probably see if I couldn't find a sub to come in for the short amount of time an OB appt probably takes and not close.

Simply because as parents...they DO want reliability and the DO want to be able to count on the fact that your life won't interfere with theirs.

It's sad but that really is the way it is. :confused: