Managing Employees When You're Not There

[Christina72684]

We're open 7:00-5:30 and have a few different shifts: 7-1, 8-5, and 11:30-5:30. My mom usually works the middle shift with 2 of our girls working the other two shifts (I'm in a separate building by myself). Well lately we have been having issues with one of our girls. If we're not there she almost always has the TV on, never interacts with the kids besides "playing" with them which usually involves sitting on the ground next to them, and is always complaining. Today my mom opened and came back at the end of the day to find out that she put all the kids in time out on the couch for HALF AN HOUR! She said that every time one of the kids got up she restarted the time. These kids are 1-2 years old!!!! She said that they all kept hitting, biting, stealing toys, etc etc.

Then she told one of our new DCM (well returning, we had the kids last year and they came back when she got her job back) that her 2.5yr old is starting to act like the other two 2yr old boys and is being bad like them by hitting, stealing toys, etc etc. WTH?!?! You don't tell another parent that! Especially when it's their first week back! My mom was standing right there when she said it too and didn't know what to do.

We thought about buying a video camera to use when we're not around, but didn't know if we should or not. Good help is so hard to find, and while she's not great, we hate trying to find someone else with good availability who doesn't need to make too much money or work too many hours. Plus it costs so much money to do everything they need (CPR, finger printing, TB, drug test, physical).

We're horrible at being bosses and hate having to address things like this. We thought about having set "lessons" or activities that must be done each day, but it's kind of hard when the kids are ages 4months-2.5 years, especially when half of them are under a year. Something needs to change and working from open to close is just not an option. We've done it before and we will burn ourselves out if we have to do that.

[Heidi]

We're open 7:00-5:30 and have a few different shifts: 7-1, 8-5, and 11:30-5:30. My mom usually works the middle shift with 2 of our girls working the other two shifts (I'm in a separate building by myself). Well lately we have been having issues with one of our girls. If we're not there she almost always has the TV on, never interacts with the kids besides "playing" with them which usually involves sitting on the ground next to them, and is always complaining. Today my mom opened and came back at the end of the day to find out that she put all the kids in time out on the couch for HALF AN HOUR! She said that every time one of the kids got up she restarted the time. These kids are 1-2 years old!!!! She said that they all kept hitting, biting, stealing toys, etc etc.

Then she told one of our new DCM (well returning, we had the kids last year and they came back when she got her job back) that her 2.5yr old is starting to act like the other two 2yr old boys and is being bad like them by hitting, stealing toys, etc etc. WTH?!?! You don't tell another parent that! Especially when it's their first week back! My mom was standing right there when she said it too and didn't know what to do.

We thought about buying a video camera to use when we're not around, but didn't know if we should or not. Good help is so hard to find, and while she's not great, we hate trying to find someone else with good availability who doesn't need to make too much money or work too many hours. Plus it costs so much money to do everything they need (CPR, finger printing, TB, drug test, physical).

We're horrible at being bosses and hate having to address things like this. We thought about having set "lessons" or activities that must be done each day, but it's kind of hard when the kids are ages 4months-2.5 years, especially when half of them are under a year. Something needs to change and working from open to close is just not an option. We've done it before and we will burn ourselves out if we have to do that.

I only have one pt assistant/sub, and she's awesome. I feel bad you have to deal with this.

The bolded, however, you won't get any sympathy from me. That's pretty much how it is for most of us family providers. Which is why nap time is sacred!

I think you will have a talk with the young lady. She will be better for a while, and then go right back to what she's doing. Training might help, but she's clearly not in the job because it's her "calling". sorry....

I should add, that I have a niece (24) just like this. She works for my sister as a sub, and it's a LOT of this stuff. Personal things on work time, complaining about the kids, being impatient. She can "turn it on" when she feels like it. She knows how she SHOULD handle the kids, but she chooses not to most of the time. My sis will give her a speech, she'll apologize, mend her ways for a while, and then...back to her old ways.

[daycare]

sorry not to sound rude, but you said you are only open from 7am-530pm? is that right? That is not a very long day and I think most of us work all day those similar hours,.

[Meeko]

Your employee is a reflection of you and your business. You HAVE to be the boss, even when it's difficult. She's doing things HER way because you are letting her.

Either let her go, train her or work along side her. If you want to keep your business and have a good reputation, you need to take charge and let her know in no uncertain terms, what is allowed and what is not.

[craftymissbeth]

Honestly, you need to let her go. If not for the pure laziness and inappropriate comments, but for making all of the children sit in time out for 30+ minutes.

PP was right in that this chick is a direct reflection of your business. I think working open to close until you find a replacement is something you need to consider. 10-12 hours is nothin' for most home providers so you probably won't find a lot of sympathy here

[Christina72684]

I understand most of you do work open to close, but every situation is different. I work by myself open to close at my preschool (8:30-5:30) and have 8 preschoolers during the day and get an additional 4-6 after schoolers in the afternoon. I rarely get a break but if I do it's to go do the grocery shopping or run an errand.

My mom is at the "baby building" and all 12 of her kids are under 2yrs old, with 6 of them being between 4-7 months old which is a lot of crying, bottle changes, rocking to sleep, etc. More times than not several of the babies are crying at the same time. No one wants to do that 10 hours a day, and they shouldn't have to. Plus my mom is almost 60 years old and not a Spring chicken anymore and she's going through some health issues that aren't making it any easier.

I think we're gonna sit down with our girls and have an employee meeting and address the issues we're having. It's just so hard for me and my mom to be bosses, ya know? I'm 2 years younger than the employee that we're having problems with and our other 2 workers are a few years younger than me so I don't feel like I have authority like my mom does. Plus I don't interact with the girls daily like my mom does. I just gotta grow a back bone and tell them what we expect.

[itlw8]

age has nothing to do with it. If you want to run a business youneed to be the boss. First I would not call them girls unless they are 18 or younger

second if you do not have an employee manual spelling out duties and what they may or may not do ( like the time out) Make one now.

As far as the employee either give her warning or let her go

You could even hire someone then fire her after they start so you are not short staffed
Or you hire the new one and cut the hours on the one you want to get rid of. Keep cutting hours and she will quit or not check the schedule to see if she gets to work and will not show. Then she is a no show and quit.... No unemployment owed she quit.

[butterfly]

Your employee is a reflection of you and your business. You HAVE to be the boss, even when it's difficult. She's doing things HER way because you are letting her.

Either let her go, train her or work along side her. If you want to keep your business and have a good reputation, you need to take charge and let her know in no uncertain terms, what is allowed and what is not.

This is exactly what I was going to say. If you don't make some changes to how this employee conducts business while at work, you are going to end up loosing clients or get terrible word of mouth. She's going to cost you so much more than it's worth.

If you think she's worth saving, you need to train her properly.

[daycare]

My mom is at the "baby building" and all 12 of her kids are under 2yrs old, with 6 of them being between 4-7 months old

are you a home daycare or a home daycare? Is this legal to have this many children of this age group?

[Starburst]

We're open 7:00-5:30 and have a few different shifts: 7-1, 8-5, and 11:30-5:30. My mom usually works the middle shift with 2 of our girls working the other two shifts (I'm in a separate building by myself). Well lately we have been having issues with one of our girls. If we're not there she almost always has the TV on, never interacts with the kids besides "playing" with them which usually involves sitting on the ground next to them, and is always complaining. Today my mom opened and came back at the end of the day to find out that she put all the kids in time out on the couch for HALF AN HOUR! She said that every time one of the kids got up she restarted the time. These kids are 1-2 years old!!!! She said that they all kept hitting, biting, stealing toys, etc etc.

Then she told one of our new DCM (well returning, we had the kids last year and they came back when she got her job back) that her 2.5yr old is starting to act like the other two 2yr old boys and is being bad like them by hitting, stealing toys, etc etc. WTH?!?! You don't tell another parent that! Especially when it's their first week back! My mom was standing right there when she said it too and didn't know what to do.

Well if you don't want to fire her, have you considered putting her on a probation period? Has she had any experience or training in CD or ECE? Or is she used to working with older children, I have never heard of an infant/toddler teacher giving time outs for children under 2 years old. Do you have an employee hand book that discusses your child care business's guidance and discipline policies?

She may need a crash course on "Daycare/ Parent Etiquette" or just needs to be told to leave the parent talking to you and your mom. I would probably at the very least apologize to the mom for the employees rude behavior (if not have her apologize for her own behavior).

Honestly though, your employee sounds like she is either socially inept (which I am too, but I open up with kids and know what not to say to parents) or is really trying to get fired (not sure why but those are offenses that would normally get someone fired).

I understand your hesitation and intimidation due to her being a little older than you but you are still your her boss and deserve respect. By always complaining about her job, not doing her job correctly, and telling the parents that their child is "being bad", she is disrespecting not only you and your mom but the business, the children, and the families. And if she is older than you, she should know better. Maybe you and your mom should see if your there are any adult supervision in child care/ECE classes (I'm taking a class in it now, and they talk about a lot of issues like the ones you described that we talk about).

[nannyde]

Are you sure she's not on her phone all the time. That would explain a lot.

[Christina72684]

My mom is at the "baby building" and all 12 of her kids are under 2yrs old, with 6 of them being between 4-7 months old

are you a home daycare or a home daycare? Is this legal to have this many children of this age group?

Huh? We can have this many, but need to have 2-3 adults depending on how many kids are there at that time, their ages, and if they can walk.

[Christina72684]

Are you sure she's not on her phone all the time. That would explain a lot.

She is on it quite a bit, but all of us are some (me and my mom as well). I don't mind during nap time or when sitting with the kids feeding them a bottle. But when they should be interacting with the kids, the phones need put away. I hate putting too many restrictions on the phones because if I do and they see me on mine then they think that's not fair (an issue we had with a past employee). But then again, I am the BOSS/OWNER and whatever I do isn't necessarily something they can do, yet I don't think they see it that way.

[Christina72684]

Your employee is a reflection of you and your business. You HAVE to be the boss, even when it's difficult. She's doing things HER way because you are letting her.

Either let her go, train her or work along side her. If you want to keep your business and have a good reputation, you need to take charge and let her know in no uncertain terms, what is allowed and what is not.

You're right.....I just wish I was stronger in this area, which is why I do better working with kids than being a boss to adults. I just need to grow a backbone (I was gonna say something else ), and say what needs to be said.

[daycare]

She is on it quite a bit, but all of us are some (me and my mom as well). I don't mind during nap time or when sitting with the kids feeding them a bottle. But when they should be interacting with the kids, the phones need put away. I hate putting too many restrictions on the phones because if I do and they see me on mine then they think that's not fair (an issue we had with a past employee). But then again, I am the BOSS/OWNER and whatever I do isn't necessarily something they can do, yet I don't think they see it that way.

I had this issue with my staff. The phone was always in her hand and she were not paying attention. I made a new rule that all phones had to be put up.

I always have my phone on me and often on it, but I am the owner, I need it to communicate with their parents, potential clients, anyone calling from any of our vendors and so on. This is the only phone we have.

I got so mad at my asst one day when I caught a child with a marble in his mouth right in front of her and she was on her phone. I told her no phones anymore, they can come out during nap or breaks. I told her if you want to be on your phone, then become the owner and you can make the rules. Right now I am paying you to work and no where in your job description does it say to text or play on your phone. If you still want your job here, keep the phone away until breaks.

She stopped, but then at nap time would take it out and just play on it the whole time. 5 minutes before leaving she would then start her work and stay over on the clock. I wrote her up and told her the next time she is over on the clock she was fired.

I said once everything is done and I have cleared you from anything else that I may need you to do, I don't care what you do with your phone, but work comes first.

I have 3 assts. This one is very young and doing her first year in college. It was really hard to put my foot down, but i had to. I didn't want to risk any of the DCks because of her lack of doing her job.

I used to feel bad too about saying anything because we work so closely every day. BUT it was not worth it to me that she was not doing her job.

Hopefully you can find a way to talk with them that will still have that same level of comfort that you want but still get that message across.

Sorry I was confused about your posts at first.....I get confused easily.