Biting! ugh...

[Msdunny]

How many bites per day do you allow?

I have a 2 (almost 3) yr old who has bitten one dcg twice today. This has never happened with him before. I am letting his mom know, but how many incidents do you 'allow' take place before sending home? We discussed this, but it is so out of the blue for him. He has been on edge all morning - normally a sweet, compliant child but now this. I hate to tell mom that if it happens again, he has to go home because I don't want to allow for it to happen again, kwim?

Edited to add: searching old threads as we speak!

[Blackcat31]

Have you dissected "WHY" he is biting?

Are there noticeable triggers that you can watch for or eliminate for the time being?

I am guessing at his age, it is due to frustration from not being able to clearly communicate his wants/needs to the others.

I have no advice about the biting because I am lucky enough to not have to have dealt with a biter since 1996. *knock on wood*

I think maybe having him shadow you for now is a good plan and then I would sit down with the parents and have a conference about what you are ALL going to do to help this little guy not want to bite.

Good luck

More threads about biting https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=biting

[daycarediva]

I have a 3 strike/day rule for ANYTHING physical.

1st- immediate TO. Notify parent
2nd-separated from other children for the remainder of the day
3rd-pick up. (obviously #2 prevents #3 unless the child goes out of the way to hurt someone, which HAS happened)

I have all families sign this policy upon enrollment.

[Msdunny]

Thanks Cat. I talked with him, and he was a bit funny. I asked, "are we supposed to bite our friends?" And he looked at me with those big, blue eyes and nodded his little blond head. So I changed my tactic.

It was a good object lesson for the little one who was bit, since she was the one that was doing the biting a couple do weeks ago. Even her mom said, when I texted her, now she knows how bad it feels.

Honestly, I am more concerned about the boy who is doing the biting. The only consistency he has in his life right now is my house. He lives with mom and her new boyfriend, but spends the weekends with dad and his new boyfriend, with a few nights with various grandparents thrown in here and there. I love him and normally he is my absolute sweetest child, but this week he has been a terror. He defies me and then gets upset to the point of being almost inconsolable.

If I had the time and would let him, he would sit on my lap and cuddle most of the day. I am really beginning to get concerned about him. He has been with me for a year and a half, and has never had this 'rage' before. I want my sweet boy back!

[CraftyMom]

Poor boy, sounds like his home life is so disorganized! No wonder he's frustrated. Maybe "try" explaining to him what frustration and anger are. Then show him some alternatives to biting when he feels this way.

[TwinKristi]

Maybe get a book about not biting, shadow him for a couple wks and see what's creating the bite scenario. I know for my own son it was ANY conflict and he's go straight to biting. Now that he can talk better and communicate more he's sooooo much better. An almost 3yr old, depending on his development, should be able to understand that's not ok. What did you do when he bit? Did he have to sit in time out or separate? What was happening when he bit?