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I didn't do daycare until mine were in school full time and then only during the summers. I only did school agers in the summer. I worked in schools during the school year part time. So mostly it wasn't a problem for us. For the most part, mine liked having the playmates and we didn't have to be licensed back then in that state so I didn't really have any regulations. Those were the days,
. Wow, that was nice. One dcp even gave me the key to her house so we could go over there, use her pool, etc.
However, I have had both of my grandchildren which I realize is slightly different. They do go home after daycare although one lived with us with her family for a year. Still her mom and dad came home and then could take her off separately.
It is still hard sometimes because they are my grandchildren. There is something I do similar to what Nannyde is saying but not exactly. My granddaughter just never napped much and so accidently I used that time to do things with her. I'd let her watch a t.v. show for a half hour so I could get some break though. After that, we spent time together. Now, also accidently, my 3 year old grandson will nap but hard as I have tried he still gets up about an hour earlier than they do. That is our time. I love it.
Maybe a 'creative schedule' would work.
Laurel
Can some of you mom's maybe stagger nap times? Since mine sleep in different rooms, I can easily put one to bed without another child knowing. If I have a child that just goes right to sleep and sleeps soundly then it is pretty easy to spend time with your own.Comment
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I'm in a bit of a different situation here because my daycare kids are all under 3 (they age out at 3.5 max here), and my own kids are 6+ (except the 18 month old in daycare). When my kids come home from school they get a snack, but I tell them not near the daycare kids; to me it's not nice to each in front of someone else and not give them. My kids are allowed anywhere in the house, and the daycare kids aren't. I would never serve dinner and not offer whoever was here (ok, maybe not never, but not on a normal night, if my child had to go out early possibly). I just don't think it's nice. Things aren't exactly equal (for example my 18 month old still gets a bottle of milk when he wakes up from nap, I'm sure the almost 2 year old might like one also but I don't give her, she gets her cup of water and doesn't complain about it). The rule is parents have to provide milk / formula so if her mother wanted to send milk I would give her. I am providing my son milk as a mother, not a day care provider.Comment
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Yes, if my ds was riding a bike I would tell him that he has to give the other kids a turn or wait until they leave to ride (I do have 3 of my own kids).
If my son had a sore throat I would have no problem letting him eat a popsicle in front of the other kids. If a dck had a sore throat (and I allowed them that day, only with a dr note and no other excludable symptoms), I would have no problem telling my kids why the dck gets one and not them. Then again, my kids are 3,6, and 8 and are all capable of reasoning and have had to deal with the same "unfair" treatment amongst themselves and each other since they were born.
Life is simply not fair. Sure, give your own kids special treatment sometimes. Give the dck's special treatment sometimes. Give one of your own kids special treatment over one of your other own children. We all do it. We, as mothers and child care providers, know where "special treatment" is warranted and where it is not.
Just don't ever give any child special treatment because they guilt you into it (your own included). Your children have it hard because they have to share their house, their toys, their mom. The dck's have it hard because they have to leave their parents, their house, their toys, and watch your children be with their house, their mom and their toys all day. YOU have it the hardest because you are stuck in the constant mental battle of what is fair and what is unfair and whether that really matters in the whole scheme of getting through the day
They will all fare better if you use your better judgment and dole out the special treatment where you feel it is justified.Comment
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I don't let my preschoolers into my daughter's bedroom or to play with her toys.
She's allowed to go play anywhere in the house with whatever she would like, but she may not bring her stuff into preschool (even when she says she wants to share, it never goes well, so we don't even go there). Also, she's allowed to get a snack whenever she wants, but I have her eat it away from the other kids. She'll sometimes watch a tv show upstairs during preschool (the kids have no idea and she knows to keep quiet about it!).
But, if she's in the preschool room, she must behave as the preschoolers, participate in our activities, eat our snacks, etc. She is not allowed to ride her bike or even show them that she gets 'special' treatment, like extra snacks, etc. The kids just know that sometimes she's off in another room, "taking a break".
I wouldn't allow her to do these things in front of the other kids. Not because it's not fair (it's not fair but that doesn't bother me), but because I think it's unkind.
this is what we do tooComment
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This is how my daycare is now too - all under 3's and my own kids are all school aged (8-15 now). So my son can go out and ride his bike (he doesn't need me there with him), does not at all mean I need to take the dck's out to ride bikes. Now back when my own child was 3 and he wanted to go ride his bike I would take all the kids out and they could ride on other things meant for daycare kids while he rode on his bike. I really don't see that as not being fair - its his home, his bike. I have ride ons meant for daycare kids, they use those.Comment
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