Is This Wrong?

[Christina72684]

I have 6 preschoolers during the day and one of them has this terrible, annoying cry/wine when she doesn't get her way. She just keeps crying and crying and crying no matter what I say or do to help the situation. Even her mom can't stand the noise. So recently I've been telling her "If you're gonna cry, go cry in the bathroom." The other morning she was in there for like 10 minutes crying/wining and would stop and start and stop and start, and then came out and was fine. I hate for the kids to hear it because it's so loud it hurts everyone's ears and they can't stand it either.

So is it bad that I have her do that?

[Leigh]

It's what I do. When the weather is nice, they can go cry on the back steps. When weather does not agree, they get to go to the cry corner to cry it out.

[CraftyMom]

I do the same. As long as I know they're not hurt or anything, I tell them to go sit in the kitchen, everyone is trying to play and no one wants to hear the noise. When they're done they can come back.

[BrooklynM]

I don't think that is bad at all. I have a DCG that was with a nanny prior to me and apparently the nanny always carried her around and never put her down. She started with me when she was 18 months old. Any time she couldn't see me, like I walked behind her, or I was holding a baby, she would start crying. I would check her diaper, and know when she was last fed and tell her if she would like to scream and whine then she can do that in her bed. She would continue, in her bed she would go. I would tell her that she must be tired if she is going to cry that way. Sometimes after a minute she would fall asleep, but if she would continue crying, I would wait for a break in the crying to come get her and act happy and say- did you get all of your crying out? When she was crying, back in bed. When she was happy and playing well I showed her plenty of attention and gave her cuddles. She is doing much better now, has become a good napper and a better eater (the nanny only gave her junk food).

She probably gets a lot of attention at home when she cries. If the child is just crying to get attention, then they need to learn how to get attention for being good, so make sure to go over the top when she is happy and playing well with others!

[Play Care]

I see nothing wrong with setting up a crying spot for children who need it. Check your regulations though because sending them to a different room for it may not be allowed. I have a corner spot in my kitchen so I can still supervise them.

[Second Home]

I also tell them if they want to cry then they have to go in the other room , I can still see them but it is not as loud .
When they are done and want to join tne group then they can come back .

[Laurel]

I have 6 preschoolers during the day and one of them has this terrible, annoying cry/wine when she doesn't get her way. She just keeps crying and crying and crying no matter what I say or do to help the situation. Even her mom can't stand the noise. So recently I've been telling her "If you're gonna cry, go cry in the bathroom." The other morning she was in there for like 10 minutes crying/wining and would stop and start and stop and start, and then came out and was fine. I hate for the kids to hear it because it's so loud it hurts everyone's ears and they can't stand it either.

So is it bad that I have her do that?

Heck no, it's not wrong!

I have a 'crying step' and just yesterday expanded it to a 'crying/mad step'. Our foyer has one step down to our playroom and it is that step. I did the mad one cause my grandson just announces really nastily that he is mad and proceeds to be a little butt. I say "It is okay to cry or be mad but please go to the crying/mad step and you can get up when you are quiet."

Laurel

[daycare]

do you know why she is crying? have you tried to find out what is causing it?

I tell the kid when they are crying ....I can see that you are sad, it's ok to be sad, but you may not scream, that hurts our ears. if they are so worked up, I will ask them to sit in the hallway and try to calm down.


once they are calm, I will sit and talk with them.

I would also try talking to her about why she cries like this at a time when she is not crying. Get out some playdough and play with her. ask at that time why she cries like she does. it will let her know that you care and that you are trying to help her.

[mema]

I see nothing wrong with setting up a crying spot for children who need it. Check your regulations though because sending them to a different room for it may not be allowed. I have a corner spot in my kitchen so I can still supervise them.

Definitely check regs, but otherwise, set up a "cry spot". She can go there until she is done. I had one on each level we were and one outside. One dcg used it a few times a day for a long time. It just never sunk in that I was not going to give in. The time she was there grew less and less, but at least once a day she was there. Now the current one I have that does it is down to occassionally and it's usually days he didn't sleep much at home or was up uber early. Most get it after a few times that you aren't giving in.

[butterfly]

I tell the kids "we don't get things when we cry and whine". As long as I know they aren't hurt, I just give them my line about not getting things with crying and ignore it. Once they stop, I tell them to use their big boy/girl words and tell me what they need.

It takes a bit for some that are used to getting their way when the waterworks start, but they quickly learn that I mean what I say.

I imagine you could use the same "trick" with the crying spot also.

:hug:

[Jack Sprat]

Nope not wrong at all. I had a 5 yr old this summer that cried A LOT. I sent him to our den and told him he could cry in there. He would sit and cry for about 30 minutes. I would of course check on him. He usually cried because we were doing our craft time, or I told him no to his chocolate milk request. It went on for three weeks. Funny thing is it didn't start till big sister started attending daycare with him.

[Crazy8]

I've occasionally had kids like this and we had a "crying spot" too. Not sure I would use a bathroom, but maybe another area out of the way. Ours was the other side of our stairway. Its best for it to be an area where you can still see them but they can't see what the other kids are doing. Often when they hear the other kids going about their business playing and having fun they want to join back in and the crying stops.

[Tdhmom]

Heck no, it's not wrong!

I have a 'crying step' and just yesterday expanded it to a 'crying/mad step'. Our foyer has one step down to our playroom and it is that step. I did the mad one cause my grandson just announces really nastily that he is mad and proceeds to be a little butt. I say "It is okay to cry or be mad but please go to the crying/mad step and you can get up when you are quiet."

Laurel

I have a crying step too! I seem to have gotten less crying/whining since I started that too as soon as they're done they can join the group again.

[itlw8]

So is she the only one that has to go to the bathroom to cry? Or does everyone have to cry in there ? If she is the only one then Yes it is wrong. If it is everyone it is less wrong.

[Laurel]

I have a crying step too! I seem to have gotten less crying/whining since I started that too as soon as they're done they can join the group again.

I have definitely gotten less crying doing this. All I have to say when I see the waterworks begin to start is "Go to the... I don't even finish the phrase and my one crier stops immediately. Same thing happened with my grandson's dramatic 'mad act' today. Here's hoping it works again tomorrow.
::
Laurel