Why Do I Let Things Get To Me???

[tenderhearts]

I really need to stop letting things "bother" me. One of my parents whom their baby has been with me since June told me tonight at pick up that she has next thursday off, (Veterans Day) her work just told them. I said ok. Well as she was leaving she said is there anything I need to do for that day, like write it down, I said no but that she would still be required to pay that day because it is not within the 2 week notice period for being unpaid. She looked and acted surprised and kind of with a huh laugh and said oh well my work just told me today. I said yes I understand that but I'm sorry.
She KNOWS my contract it clearly states this in there, and for 3 months in the summer straight I put reminders in my monthly newsletters reminding them that they needed to give me the 2 week notice for any days or vacations child wont be in care to not be charged for those days. She has given me written notices for days off before, I know she knows. So why do people have to do this? I dont' even know why I feel bad, but I feel everything, mad that she would even ask, guilty for not giving it to her.
What exactly do you say to people when they ask these things of you? I always feel bad at the time and I HATE when people put me ont he spot like that and I always feel like I didn't say the right thing or maybe I should have said it different. I just said sorry it's not within the 2 week notice and she'd still be required to pay. I thought my "new" clients would get it. I'm pretty sure where she works she would have known before today PLUS I'm 99.9% sure she gets paid for it. Some people!!!

Why can't everyone be like my other client who always offers to pay for her requested days off well over 2 weeks notice because she feels bad I'm not getting paid....

[Live and Learn]

I hear ya Tenderhearts. I think you handled it just right....you were just matter of fact and business like. Good job.

[tenderhearts]

Thanks Live and Learn,I feel better that I said and did the right thing, but why do I let these things bother me, it's been bothering me all night, why? I'm glad I didn't feel guilty and say oh ok you don't have to pay, I'm VERY glad I've been sticking to my guns on these things but my daughter who is 18 heard and she said what was that about the day thing? I told her and she said yea she sounded kind of irritated by it.
I know I shouldn't let it bother me and I know she would figure out quickly it would be the same or her paying way more going some where else. I just don't get people, I really like this family too, now feel mad and irritated with her. thanks again.

[MyAngels]

This is what I say: "Darn! It's too bad you weren't able to let me know sooner, you could have taken that day as one of your unpaid vacation days."

I say this before they even ask whether it's paid or not. For some reason this seems to make it easier for them to accept, and avoids the awkward feelings about asking whether they get it free or not.

[Live and Learn]

Tenderhearts...I often do the same thing in these situations. I stew on it and obsess over it even when I know I handled the situation right. I think that I just resent being put in the position of having to explain my policies over and over to people who I know are aware of my policies...they just seem to be trying to get away with something. I feel like I have to be the cop all day with the little ones and then at the end of the day at pickup with their parents sometimes too!

[boysx5]

thats the reason I don't give them free days they would just all take me for granted. Does cable let you get by a free week because you didn't have time to watch t.v. no so daycare is the same way. Thats my motto I had to learn the hard way I must say

[BentleysBands]

you did the right thing!

i hate it too and sometimes i cave in...when parents do that it makes you feel so worthless and un-appreciated...like all we do is sit around and eat bon bons ...good for you for standing up for yourself!!!

[nannyde]

I don't do any free days.

It is SO much easier on everyones relationships to just have every week be the same... 52 weeks a year. It makes it so you don't have to talk about money at all except for late fees or in my case later departure schedule changes that may come up.

I love having a no money talk business. Whatever does come up is in my policies so they know the answer before they bring it to me. They figure the costs on their own with my money policies on my website.

Easy peezy

When I get them all to do all payments via wire transfers or cash I'm going to be able to go MONTHS without ever having to talk money.... that will be sweet.

[DancingQueen]

No free days here either.
I need the steady income and can't have it changing here and there because parents take days off work.

[missnikki]

This is one of my biggest pet peeves too!!!

Some parents will test the boundaries and size you up with those uncomfortable questions. Good for you for not falling for it!

[tenderhearts]

I'm very very glad I didn't give in, I use to all the time because I felt bad but not anymore,other than how Live and Learn explained it, resentful that they even ask such a thing when they KNOW the contract. I finally told myself a little over a year ago that I NEED to stick to my policies. I even told her like a month ago that she didn't need to pay me for my 2 paid days (Thanksgiving and day after) since they were out that whole week and 2 days of the previous week. It was one of those things you think about when it comes up. I figured someone shouldn't have to pay for those days if they are out the whole week, I explained to her if she was here even one day that week then she'd have to pay. So it's not like I don't "work" with people.
I worried how she was going to act this morning since she definetly seemed irritated by it yesterday but she was very nice, maybe she went home and called all her friends and they told her that's just how it is.

[Gurdy]

I wonder if she will bring her child that day, now that she was unable to wiggle her way out of paying for it??

[momofboys]

I am the same way & I also have a hard time sometimes standing my ground & it makes me mad to a point when parents ask me to bend the rules. I have gotten better at it though. I think you did the right thing, don't feel guilty!