Trouble With Parent That Hasn't Even Started

[Unregistered]

I have not heard from her. She said she would call me next week. She seems to have agreed with the wait and see approach.

For the person who asked about my exact contract language, here are the 2 passages that I believe protect me from having to refund the deposit if she backs out.

Deposits
A non-refundable deposit of 8 weeks tuition, based on the age of your child, is required to hold a spot
for 60-120 days, and will be applied to the first 4 weeks, and last 4 weeks of care.

Holding Fee
• If for any reason your child is unable to begin care on the contracted start date, a non-refundable weekly holding fee equal to your weekly tuition payment will be collected in order to continue to hold your spot.
• Non-payment of the weekly holding fee will result in forfeiture of the deposit and daycare spot.

[Unregistered]

OP Here...update

I contacted DCM and let her know I have a family member able to take care of my infant outside my home for a few weeks on the days she needs care, therefore, they will be able to start on their start date regardless of walking. I have not heard back yet. Obviously this is not ideal for me or my son as I'm sending to someone else's house while I watch other peoples children at mine, but I'm trying to do my best to not inconvenience this family.

Now let's see if she still tries to back out because of my breastfeeding. If she still tries to back out even though I did everything in my power to have them start on the contracted start date there is no way I will refund the deposit.

Does anyone think a judge would rule in favor of refunding a deposit due to a provider breastfeeding (even under a nursing cover)?

[Michael]

Pushing this back up...

[JoseyJo]

Does anyone think a judge would rule in favor of refunding a deposit due to a provider breastfeeding (even under a nursing cover)?

Personally I don't think so. I am not a lawyer or anything but unless the contract specifically says you WONT breastfeed I don't see how she could get out of it because you are.

[Unregistered]

Spoke with DCM, she's definitely backing out because she claims since speaking with me she made other arrangements and now wants her deposit back. She says I misrepresented myself (by making staffing changes and breastfeeding????). She is threatening legal action to get her deposit and to make a complaint about me to the state because she feels unsafe about bringing her child here due to the changes (changes: breastfeeding and staff scheduling, which to make her more comfortable I notified her I would be bringing my assistant back one day per week to help out). Her child has never been in my care, yet she's accusing me of making her feel unsafe about bringing her child.

When we spoke previously she said she would touch base in a week and see where we stand. Within that week I made arrangements for my child to be cared for outside my home so as to still be able to have them start on their start date, no matter what. I am meeting my contractual obligation to hold their spot until their start date.

I have notified my licensor of the possibility of a complaint and everything that has happened and that the parent is backing out due to my breastfeeding and staff scheduling.

I need to learn to follow my instincts when it comes to parents....this one seemed like trouble since I first spoke with her about this spot over the summer. She waffled about signing up for a couple months before committing to the spot. I'm not so sure this business is for me. I love working with kids, but the parents, not so much!

[Nebula]

Ambiguity in a contract generally works in favor of the signatory, so any grey areas will most likely be interpreted to benefit the signatory, not the drafter. So for future reference, make sure your care contract is specific. The more detailed and specific, the more it works in favor of both parties.
(I have a best friend who is an attorney... he helped me with all my paperwork!) Thank God for best friends who are attorneys

[CraftyMom]

Spoke with DCM, she's definitely backing out because she claims since speaking with me she made other arrangements and now wants her deposit back. She says I misrepresented myself (by making staffing changes and breastfeeding????). She is threatening legal action to get her deposit and to make a complaint about me to the state because she feels unsafe about bringing her child here due to the changes (changes: breastfeeding and staff scheduling, which to make her more comfortable I notified her I would be bringing my assistant back one day per week to help out). Her child has never been in my care, yet she's accusing me of making her feel unsafe about bringing her child.

When we spoke previously she said she would touch base in a week and see where we stand. Within that week I made arrangements for my child to be cared for outside my home so as to still be able to have them start on their start date, no matter what. I am meeting my contractual obligation to hold their spot until their start date.

I have notified my licensor of the possibility of a complaint and everything that has happened and that the parent is backing out due to my breastfeeding and staff scheduling.

I need to learn to follow my instincts when it comes to parents....this one seemed like trouble since I first spoke with her about this spot over the summer. She waffled about signing up for a couple months before committing to the spot. I'm not so sure this business is for me. I love working with kids, but the parents, not so much!

Sounds like you may have dodged a bullet by never having her child in your care, I can pretty much guarantee there would haven more trouble once she started. I need to listen to my gut more as well, parents are the worst! You may want to cut your losses and give her the deposit back

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

You have proof that you informed her of the rule about walking. If she cancels, I would keep the deposit. The issue with breastfeeding is a non-issue to me...you're feeding your child-that's NOT a reason to withdraw in my opinion, and I would think a judge would agree if she tried to sue for the deposit.

Bingo.

[JoseyJo]

Spoke with DCM, she's definitely backing out because she claims since speaking with me she made other arrangements and now wants her deposit back. She says I misrepresented myself (by making staffing changes and breastfeeding????). She is threatening legal action to get her deposit and to make a complaint about me to the state because she feels unsafe about bringing her child here due to the changes (changes: breastfeeding and staff scheduling, which to make her more comfortable I notified her I would be bringing my assistant back one day per week to help out). Her child has never been in my care, yet she's accusing me of making her feel unsafe about bringing her child.

When we spoke previously she said she would touch base in a week and see where we stand. Within that week I made arrangements for my child to be cared for outside my home so as to still be able to have them start on their start date, no matter what. I am meeting my contractual obligation to hold their spot until their start date.

I have notified my licensor of the possibility of a complaint and everything that has happened and that the parent is backing out due to my breastfeeding and staff scheduling.

I need to learn to follow my instincts when it comes to parents....this one seemed like trouble since I first spoke with her about this spot over the summer. She waffled about signing up for a couple months before committing to the spot. I'm not so sure this business is for me. I love working with kids, but the parents, not so much!

I may be the odd one out here but I would NOT give her back her deposit/holding fee. If she sues you the most she would get was her holding fee back, and you may have to cover part of a day to go to court, right? You don't have to hire a lawyer, just go per se (representing yourself). I have done that a few times, it wasn't hard at all.

As for her turning you in to licensing, as scary as that is there is no way anything would happen. I doubt they would even come out as her child never had the chance to be "unsafe" with you, and breastfeeding and staffing changes w/i your ratio are not reasons for the state to investigate you. If they do come out so what? They will look around, (mine would joke w/ you about how crazy dcm is) and leave.

I think it may be a different issue if you had refused to let DCB start due to his non-walking, but you found someone to watch your own son so you could watch her son until he started walking. As for her not wanting to start him due to staffing and breastfeeding I stand firm that it is (IMO) unlikely a judge would rule that breach of contract unless your contract specifies # of caregivers/ratio, or non-breastfeeding.

[Margarete]

Canceling for breastfeeding would not go over well. I found it interesting that in some states asking a mother to stop, move elsewhere, or even cover up is a violation of her civil rights. I think she would be on the wrong side of the law for even listing this as a reason to try to get her deposit back.

http://www.babycenter.com/404_is-it-legal-to-breastfeed-in-public_8939.bc

What state do you live in?

[Margarete]

I'd bet she isn't so upset about the fact you are breastfeeding as the perception that her child will be left "unattended" while you are holding your own child for a large portion of every day.

Honestly, it will come down to the wording of your contract. We would need the exact wording to be able to give a concrete opinion. Even then it would only be that... an opinion.

Can you maybe consult with an attorney?

This shouldn't (I know it *could*) be seen any different then feeding a baby with a bottle. Most people I know hold babies while feeding them (their own and babies in their care).

[Unregistered]

Canceling for breastfeeding would not go over well. I found it interesting that in some states asking a mother to stop, move elsewhere, or even cover up is a violation of her civil rights. I think she would be on the wrong side of the law for even listing this as a reason to try to get her deposit back.

http://www.babycenter.com/404_is-it-legal-to-breastfeed-in-public_8939.bc

What state do you live in?

I'm in MA.

[TheGoodLife]

I sure hope you don't give any refund. Print and keep any documentation (texts, emails, ect) of conversations you have to prove that you held up your end of the contract and you should have no problem. If you send her a highlighted copy of what you have in your contract AND your copy of communications where you were honoring the original start by modifying your own child's arrangement, I'd bet she'll back off- she must know shed have no legal ground to stand on. Maybe throw in a legal document about the right to BF to boot sorry that is happening to you!

[TwinKristi]

I sure hope you don't give any refund. Print and keep any documentation (texts, emails, ect) of conversations you have to prove that you held up your end of the contract and you should have no problem. If you send her a highlighted copy of what you have in your contract AND your copy of communications where you were honoring the original start by modifying your own child's arrangement, I'd bet she'll back off- she must know shed have no legal ground to stand on. Maybe throw in a legal document about the right to BF to boot sorry that is happening to you!

I agree with this. I would call her bluff and let her sue you.

[Margarete]

Here is a link to MA specific breastfeeding law language

http://breastfeedinglaw.com/state-laws/massachusetts/