Did I Mis-Use My Backbone?

[Cat Herder]

Shuffling= Transporting, having kids in and out more than once a day = constant disruptions to your schedule = stress. ::::

Many providers only allow one drop-off/one pick-up a day. Many provider cannot/will not transport. Many providers have drop-off hours forbiding arrivals after morning snack.

(sorry for the delay... was shoving lunch in my face. )

[boysx5]

Another thought is that if you had a job outside of your home and your boss kept cutting your hours and reducing your paycheck (what this family is doing to you), you'd look elsewhere for a job with more hours. You could also put it to them that way....if you want to.

Laurel

Great point

[Lucy]

Shuffling= Transporting, having kids in and out more than once a day = constant disruptions to your schedule = stress. ::::

Many providers only allow one drop-off/one pick-up a day. Many provider cannot/will not transport. Many providers have drop-off hours limiting arrivals after morning snack.

(sorry for the delay... was shoving lunch in my face. )

I guess I still don't get it. Maybe I explained something wrong. I have all school agers. They arrive in the morning, leave for school, (walk) and then come back after school. (Walk) Two of them have PM kindergarten and there's no school bus, so I drive them 2 blocks to school. They all walk back here together after school.

[Cat Herder]

I guess I still don't get it. Maybe I explained something wrong. I have all school agers. They arrive in the morning 5leave for school, and come back after school. Two of them have PM kindergarten and there's no school bus, so I drive them 2 blocks to school. They all walk back here together after school.

I was making the point that they are lucky to have found you.

Not many providers are willing to do what you do. lovethis

That is how I started my daycare and it was work...... I would not do it again to save my house. ::::

That is all....

Edited to add: (I also had infants in tow.... my own. I did not know you had no kids mid day. Lucky )

[Lucy]

I was making the point that they are lucky to have found you.

Not many providers are willing to do what you do. lovethis

That is how I started my daycare and it was work...... I would not do it again to save my house. ::::

That is all....

So you mean just the fact that I watch all school agers?? Ok. I can see where that's not for everyone. I actually didn't do it "on purpose". In fact this is the first time in 20 yrs of DC that this has happened. They've all (5) grown up at my house, so I've "trained" them MY way . In the past when I've taken older kids who didnt grow up with me, I've regretted it KWIM?

And really, there's no "schedule"to disrupt. They ARE the schedule, if that makes sense.

I considered advertising for younger ones to be here while the rest were in school, but realized this would give me from 12:50 to 3:40 with NO kids!! It's been awesome! I care for my mom with Alzheimer's, and can now take her to appointments during that time. And can do my own appts too. I had a haircut at 2pm not long ago. It seemed so weird!

Anyway, there's no "shuffling". I drive the 2 girls literally 2 blocks to school. That's it. I never gave it a 2nd thought or thought that other providers would find it odd or unusual.

[My3cents]

Thanks so much, ladies! In my explanations above, I'm truely not trying to backpeddle or make excuses. I just hadn't fully explained things in my original post because it would have muddled up my original intent, which was to get reassurance that I used my backbone correctly. It's just in my nature and my personality to want to "do unto others" (totally NOT meant in a religious way!!), so I tend to feel twinges of guilt when I do what is ACTUALLY the CORRECT thing to do. I know in my analytical mind that it's the right thing to do, but my people-pleasing side tries to change my mind. That's all......

Thanks again for your help, gals!!! :hug:

I guess I reassure you then Even after nineteen years we still learn new things. I have- My backbone is often softened from my love of helping/caring of other people and realizing they are human beings just trying to make it day to day like the rest of us- (not that they are aliens......., just cracked myself up not hard to do on a Friday) I don't understand why you would give a free day on Presidents Day? but with that said we all do what we feel is right and as long as you don't resent your decision down the road you probably are all set. If I was one of your clients and I found out you did special for another client and not me that wouldn't set well with me-

I see so many women on this forum that have no backbone or have one and don't use it out of fear- I try to encourage, empower, and keep my own strong in a profession that it is constantly being challenged.

I too believe in do onto others- but I admit I slide sometimes out of a poor attitude from lack of it in others and past experiences. I work on this all the time. I believe in being a good person in general and I strive for this everyday. Being a good person doesn't mean that I have to let go of everything that I know to be right or put myself behind so others can always step ahead. I think being a good person means taking care of ourselves so we can be good to others.

Best and happy weekend to ya

[Play Care]

So you mean just the fact that I watch all school agers?? Ok. I can see where that's not for everyone. I actually didn't do it "on purpose". In fact this is the first time in 20 yrs of DC that this has happened. They've all (5) grown up at my house, so I've "trained" them MY way . In the past when I've taken older kids who didnt grow up with me, I've regretted it KWIM?

And really, there's no "schedule"to disrupt. They ARE the schedule, if that makes sense.

I considered advertising for younger ones to be here while the rest were in school, but realized this would give me from 12:50 to 3:40 with NO kids!! It's been awesome! I care for my mom with Alzheimer's, and can now take her to appointments during that time. And can do my own appts too. I had a haircut at 2pm not long ago. It seemed so weird!

Anyway, there's no "shuffling". I drive the 2 girls literally 2 blocks to school. That's it. I never gave it a 2nd thought or thought that other providers would find it odd or unusual.

It makes sense now that you explained you only have older kids. My program is mostly birth- 5, so having to bring SA kids to and from would be a HUGE imposition. But if I only had SA kids it *might* be a service I would offer.
I think most of of this visual of trying to get all the littles into car seats, perhaps even having to wake infants, transporting, perhaps having to bring everyone into the school for pick ups, trying to get everyone back in the car, etc. and we go ::

[Lucy]

I guess I reassure you then ???

Even after nineteen years we still learn new things. I have- My backbone is often softened from my love of helping/caring of other people and realizing they are human beings just trying to make it day to day like the rest of us Yeah, that pretty much sums it up for me too. I usually know the right thing to do, but as I think I said above, my bleeding heart tries to talk me out of it.

I don't understand why you would give a free day on Presidents Day? But I'm not. I'm just not charging my "non-school day surcharge". I'm not deducting anything. Their pay will remain exactly the same four the full 4 weeks. The only difference is that if they had been here a FULL day on Pres Day, they would have paid EXTRA. I'm waiving that part only. Combining the 2 girls' hours, they would normally (on a regular SCHOOL day) be here 10 hours, 20 min. On Pres Day with Dad working Swing, they'll be here a combined total of SIX hours. It was a trade off for me. I'm quite comfortable with it. No free days here!!!

but with that said we all do what we feel is right and as long as you don't resent your decision down the road you probably are all set. If I was one of your clients and I found out you did special for another client and not me that wouldn't set well with me- No special at all. I guess I don't get the way of thinking. So I'm going to have them LESS time than I would on a school-day, but I'm going to upcharge them because it's a holiday? Even though they'll be here LESS time? Totally NOT trying to be snarky or argumentative. I truly don't get it. Please don't think I'm picking a fight.

I see so many women on this forum that have no backbone or have one and don't use it out of fear- I try to encourage, empower, and keep my own strong in a profession that it is constantly being challenged. And I SOOOooooo appreciate this forum, and you, for JUST THAT REASON!! We need to give each other advice, and to reassure each other that we've done the right thing even when we feel guilty about doing what we KNOW is right. This forum is AWESOME for that!!!

I too believe in do onto others- but I admit I slide sometimes out of a poor attitude from lack of it in others and past experiences. I work on this all the time. I believe in being a good person in general and I strive for this everyday. Being a good person doesn't mean that I have to let go of everything that I know to be right or put myself behind so others can always step ahead. I think being a good person means taking care of ourselves so we can be good to others. Absolutely correct.

Best and happy weekend to ya

Thank you!! lovethis

[Lucy]

It makes sense now that you explained you only have older kids. My program is mostly birth- 5, so having to bring SA kids to and from would be a HUGE imposition. But if I only had SA kids it *might* be a service I would offer.
I think most of of this visual of trying to get all the littles into car seats, perhaps even having to wake infants, transporting, perhaps having to bring everyone into the school for pick ups, trying to get everyone back in the car, etc. and we go ::

Oh I get you now! No, no, no.... not trying to get infants and toddlers into car seats and all that!! LOL. Mine are 5-10 years. They all buckle themselves. And I don't take them ALL to school. It's just that I'm just not going to let two 5-yr old girls walk to school alone when I have a perfectly good van in my driveway. KWIM? The older ones (3rd, 4th, and 5th graders) walk in the morning, and all five of them walk here after school together. The kinders are younger sibs. One is with the 3rd grader, and one with the 5th grader.

But no, I wouldn't transport if I had lots of tiny ones! You're right!