Have You Ever Been So Upset...

[Play Care]

Was there anything that would help the dcb feel more secure in his environment? Or now looking back can you offer any advise? I really want to make the day go more smoothly while dcg is here. Last week I was watching my assistant with her. My assistant was bribing her with toys and objects "a Leaf that she wanted" to get her to clean up, eat and participate in group time activities. ...I do not like bribing the children at all. I think it teaches bad perceptions of how things "should be". I try to teach the children that we do things because we need to or want to without getting something in return.
The bribing was working like a charm though. I talked to her mom about it at the end of the week. Dcm said that she does the same thing......
Many times I want to term the family. But I get really scared when I think about lil dcg being with someone else. I'm afraid that the other daycare won't understand her and she will be hurt or neglected. Is this completely insane for me to think this way? :confused:

If you keep this child, you and your assistant BOTH need to be on the same page. Perhaps a sticker chart for ALL the children for cleaning up? Kids who fill their chart may be able to chose a special treat (I go to the $ store and pick out some inexpensive things) but I would not be bribing one child or allowing my assistant to bribe one child to do things.
But I want to speak to the last sentence - I've heard this a lot from providers. Years ago I kept a child who was just NOT a good fit. I felt as you did. But now that she has moved on to school, I wish I would have let her go. Just because I didn't have the key to this child doesn't mean someone else wouldn't have. I've come to think that maybe instead of "saving" her, I deprived her of the chance to have a really awesome early childhood experience. Just another idea.