-
-
I think this is an important piece. I have children of multiple ages as do most in home providers. I have NEVER felt that upset with children under 3 - most of the behavior is age appropriate (even the tantrums), and typically redirection, reminders, and lots of positive attention/supervision make most issues minor. It sounds as if the OP, and others who have come forward, are speaking of children who are ages 3+, not infant and toddlers, but preschoolers and in some cases almost school aged children.
Most of my dc clients have said that they find the several months just before K to be AWFUL in terms of their child's behavior. One of my most staunch non-spanking clients said this was the time that if she had spanked, she would have.Comment
-
Yep! Once while I was working in a center in the ones class I got punched in the face by a 15 month old. Closed fist punch right to my nose. I stood up and walked out of the room leaving my co-worker out of ratio. I went about 10 steps down to the office and told the 3people sitting in the computer watching YouTube that someone needs to go in there while I collect myself. This kid was VIOLENT all the time and that punch was completely on purpose.
P.s. I've had to walk away more than that time, but just thought I would share an example with youComment
-
I would for sure send the kid home before reaching that point
hugs to you:hug::hug:Comment
-
What about a parent? :
: :: ::
Comment
-
Omg, why is today so bad??!??? I'm having a horrible time here, too. I had 3 dcks assigned to their own spots on the floor with a bin of toys in front of them because they hsd just fotten out of control. I hate feeling this upset with the kids, but this day (this whole week really) has just been crazy! And to top it off, it's my sons 3rd birthday, and I've been "mean miss laura" all morning
Comment
-
Oh don't worry, my 3 yo dcg didn't like me earlier because I wouldn't let her watch a show. She was not listening to the rules at the sensory table so we didn't get a special treat of watching something.Omg, why is today so bad??!??? I'm having a horrible time here, too. I had 3 dcks assigned to their own spots on the floor with a bin of toys in front of them because they hsd just fotten out of control. I hate feeling this upset with the kids, but this day (this whole week really) has just been crazy! And to top it off, it's my sons 3rd birthday, and I've been "mean miss laura" all morning
She likes me now though.
It has been the whole week!Comment
-
Have we all been stuck inside this week? I know here, everybody's crawling the walls. We're almost breaking zero out there. A whole week of not even breathing the fresh air for 5 minutes. I may try it this afternoon. Heck, 0 is a frikkin heat wave now.
Comment
-
Yes we have and that's the problem! Right now it's 4, but with the windchill it feels like it's -18! My dd's school even cancelled school today!Comment
-
We super providers..
Gosh, we are good humans!!! I had one three year old who used to knock on my face with his head all the time, one day it came unexpectedly, he knocked me so hard on my mouth that he cracked my tooth, two months after I had to spent four thousand dollars to have a tooth implant. It`s so sad to hear all of these horrible things about little kids, but unfortunately some might have some kind of mental problems. My little "devil" does have it, so today I do understand why he acted like that. Today he is older and once in while he cries to come inside the daycare to hug me and tell me how much he loves me. The most important thing is just to walk away, never take it personal and try to figure out why that child is acting like that. For the first 4 to 6 weeks or until a child get used to the new environment it`s normal for s/he to cry.
Comment
-
I had a little boy I watched before I was licensed who bit my son a few times. He was just a little baby, like 5-6mos old. I tried to keep the baby away from him and put him up in the high chair if I was making meals or something. I heard my baby cry and look to see the DCB biting his foot. Poor baby couldn't even get out of his high chair or move away from him. I felt horrible. He broke the skin and everything. I only watched him one time after that. His aunt told me to smack his mouth when he does it. I have had a few people tell me to punish their child but obviously we can't. One boy was my best friend's son and I told him numerous times it's a good thing he wasn't my son because he'd get a spanking or severe consequence for that. He was a really naughty boy. I got to the point of crying a few times because I just didn't know what to do. It was just so hard to deal with him and not ruin my 20yr friendship with his mom. Both her kids were crazy!!Comment
-
I have one dcg (dcg1)that has been with me for 2 years now. She is almost 3. When I started watching her she was 11 months old. She is one of my more difficult children to care for. She has always been the way I am about to talk about.....If she sees 1 or several children playing in an area together, she will walk into the middle of that play area and stand there and look at the children playing. If one of them touches her (by accident or intentionally softly) she will yell "Hey, stop it, or scream ouch and bend down and hold the area that has been touched. Or sometimes she will see a child playing with a toy and then put that toy down for a second to do something. Dcg1 will walk over and grab the toy and hold it in front of the other child so that they can see that she now has the toy. If the child grabs for the toy dcg1 will scream and cry that the toy was taken from her. Or if the child that had the toy in the beginning sees that dcg1 now has the toy, but decides that they doesn't want it anymore, dcg1 will waive the toy in front of the child and say heeeeeeey. This dcg1 rarely plays with other children. She plays alone for the most part. She rarely participates in circle time or group activities. She doesn't like to color or draw or practice writing letters or numbers. If I force her to participate it activities like circle time or writing, tracing, coloring her name or any other beneficial pre k exercises...or games for that matter she will either scream, cry, bend down and sit and cry, or look straight at me and say No.
When she cries for long periods of time I put her in the other room in a pack n play. I tell her that as soon as she is done crying to call for me and I will come and get her. And she does. She will cry for several minutes and then call for me. I will come in and ask if she got all the crying out. She says yes. I pick her up and ask if I can have a hug. She always gives me one and I just hold her. Then I take her in the bathroom and wash her face off with a paper towel.
I have talked to her mom about what I just talked about. There has been a traumatic parent split up and moving around in the past year. The behaviors where there from the beginning though. They just intensified over the past year.
Do these behaviors sound odd to any of you? Do they seem like a behavior that would come from a 1 to 3 year old? She actually has not had her 3rd birthday yet. I have never seen these behaviors in a child this young. Thanks for reading and I look forward to your input.Comment
-
^^ sadly yes! I have seen these behaviors in a sibling set. The business about toys and taunting others, taking things as soon as someone puts it down and just holds it, doesn't actually play with it, like just to be the one to take it. Then teasing someone because they have it now. They both do that. He learned it from sister. He doesn't like people near him, cries and swats at people, isn't good at sharing, taking turns... The DCB didn't like to participate, didn't like to do crafts, didn't like being messy or wet... I would also put him in the PNP when he threw fits and when he calms down he can come out. He wasn't even 2! The sister is now 4 and it's always hard to get her to participate. She says "my mom said I don't have to do that..." Or "But J did that..." or some excuse. It was super frustrating. He goes to Jr Preschool with other already 2yr olds (all enrolled in the Fall at 2 so now 2.5+) and I watched him last week one day and he was awful! Worse than before. Attacking his sister if she took his toy or hitting her or the other boys. Very whiney, very possessive! Reminded me of why I was glad to see them go! But this mom is in major denial about it. Thinks it's perfectly normal!Comment
-
That is a warning sign to me.
I've actually had a child who has made me feel that way more than once with uncontrollable crying all day every day and so I knew it was time for her to go elsewhere. If I ever feel that way towards a child, it is a warning to me that we're not a good fit and it's best if we part ways.Comment
-
Was there anything that would help the dcb feel more secure in his environment? Or now looking back can you offer any advise? I really want to make the day go more smoothly while dcg is here. Last week I was watching my assistant with her. My assistant was bribing her with toys and objects "a Leaf that she wanted" to get her to clean up, eat and participate in group time activities. ...I do not like bribing the children at all. I think it teaches bad perceptions of how things "should be". I try to teach the children that we do things because we need to or want to without getting something in return.
The bribing was working like a charm though. I talked to her mom about it at the end of the week. Dcm said that she does the same thing......
Many times I want to term the family. But I get really scared when I think about lil dcg being with someone else. I'm afraid that the other daycare won't understand her and she will be hurt or neglected. Is this completely insane for me to think this way? :confused:
Comment
Tweet
Comment