A Bit Frustrated ...

[DaycareMom]

I think I have talked about this before, but was just wondering what others experience have been and if you have any advice for me ...

I have 2 DCFs. I have had one for over 4 yrs and the other for over 2 yrs. In the last 6 months or so the DCMs have become very close. They go to exercise classes together, set up play dates for their kids, etc.

It has only started bothering me since I hear different stories from them or they will just mention things in passing that are contradicting.

Here is the issue: DCM #2 has told me many times that DCB will be here until Kindergarten unless I ask them to leave before that.
DCM #1 was telling me that they were discussing preschool and that DCM #2 was planning on sending DCB to preschool in the fall.

Would you confront DCM #2? It seems childish to bring it up since it is here say, but I also don't want to be out of income and not have someone to fill the spot.

[Blackcat31]

There is no such thing as job security in this profession.

I tell all my DCP's that if they don't hear it directly from me, then it may not be true and I expect the same behavior from them.

If DCM # 2 is truly planning on sending her child to preschool, then she'll tell you when she is ready.

If she doesn't mention anything, I would NOT say anything.

I wouldn't take DCM#1's words at face value since she is supposedly DCM#2's friend.

If she were truly her friend, why is she discussing her business with you behind her (DCM #2) back?

I'd believe and go by what each parent DIRECTLY tells YOU and nothing more.

Even if it's true. It's DCM #2's right and obligation to tell you herself.

[cheerfuldom]

I think I have talked about this before, but was just wondering what others experience have been and if you have any advice for me ...

I have 2 DCFs. I have had one for over 4 yrs and the other for over 2 yrs. In the last 6 months or so the DCMs have become very close. They go to exercise classes together, set up play dates for their kids, etc.

It has only started bothering me since I hear different stories from them or they will just mention things in passing that are contradicting.

Here is the issue: DCM #2 has told me many times that DCB will be here until Kindergarten unless I ask them to leave before that.
DCM #1 was telling me that they were discussing preschool and that DCM #2 was planning on sending DCB to preschool in the fall.

Would you confront DCM #2? It seems childish to bring it up since it is here say, but I also don't want to be out of income and not have someone to fill the spot.

No I would not mention it. But I would plan for it. I would discuss preschool plans by mid summer and have parents commit to the school year at that time or give notice of intention to begin preschool in the fall (essentially a term notice so you can interview to fill the spot). At this point, it is just two moms talking. There is nothing wrong with that. Fall is months away and the last thing you want to do is get involved and have both moms turn on you. Just leave things be and rediscuss this summer. I wouldnt say anything about what you have heard, just ask that parents make a decision about staying or going at that time. Its normal for moms to check out multiple school options so it really isnt a reflection on you. They just want to see what all is a possibility.

[DaycareMom]

There is no such thing as job security in this profession.

I tell all my DCP's that if they don't hear it directly from me, then it may not be true and I expect the same behavior from them.

If DCM # 2 is truly planning on sending her child to preschool, then she'll tell you when she is ready.

If she doesn't mention anything, I would NOT say anything.

I wouldn't take DCM#1's words at face value since she is supposedly DCM#2's friend.

If she were truly her friend, why is she discussing her business with you behind her (DCM #2) back?

I'd believe and go by what each parent DIRECTLY tells YOU and nothing more.

Even if it's true. It's DCM #2's right and obligation to tell you herself.

I don't think that DCM #1 was talking behind her back. It wasn't said in that way. She was just telling me about a preschool she was looking into for her daughter and she mentioned that DCM #2 was planning to send DCB there next year. I don't think she thought anything of it since she doesn't know what we had previously discussed.

Is there ever a time which you might just come out and say something along the lines of wanting to plan ahead so you were just wondering what their plans are?

[Blackcat31]

I don't think that DCM #1 was talking behind her back. It wasn't said in that way. She was just telling me about a preschool she was looking into for her daughter and she mentioned that DCM #2 was planning to send DCB there next year. I don't think she thought anything of it since she doesn't know what we had previously discussed.

Is there ever a time which you might just come out and say something along the lines of wanting to plan ahead so you were just wondering what their plans are?

Oh, I understand.

I thought the one mom was just blabbing away about what she knew about the other one...

In that case, what I would do is what Cheer suggested. I wouldn't come out and say anything to DCM but I would ask that plans be finalized and put in place by xxx date so that you know.

It seems a bit early now, but there really isn't any other way to do it because you cant force a family to commit and even if they do, they still might change their plans...kwim?

I guess you kind of just have to wait and see what happens. As long as the parents give proper notice to you according to your contract they aren't doing anything wrong if they plan to leave but don't say anything until that time.

I know it totally ****s to feel so unsure but other than just trusting DCM's words that she isn't planning on leaving, that's all you can really do.

[Maria2013]

I would not confront the parent, if the kid gets pulled oh well time to advertise

[Shell]

I've had a very similar situation happen recently, and posted on here about it. I agree with the recommendation above to wait until the summer, and then put out a paper inquiring about preschool plans. I have one that keeps talking about signing her 2 year old (?!) up, but she never says when, and I am kind of patiently waiting for them to give their notice (very frustrating). If I could find a replacement, I would do so immediately. My advice is, wait it out, but if you find a replacement family, then I would ask the family what their plans are sooner. As BC said, there is no job security in this profession, but you also can't ask people what their plans are too soon! It's rough!

[Cat Herder]

Typically you would have until August to plan for this.

Maybe just let them know you are beginning Curriculum Planning for "K3-K4 2014-2015" and you need confirmation of who will be attending Sept-May so you can purchase enough supplies for each participating child.

Explain that if you don't get a response by __-__ their child will not be able to participate and early withdrawal after such time may incur a curriculum reimbursement fee.

**This would be a good time to remind them that you have a couple people on the waiting list and need to be able to update your roster as soon as possible to not inconvenience other families.

[mia]

There is no such thing as job security in this profession.

I tell all my DCP's that if they don't hear it directly from me, then it may not be true and I expect the same behavior from them.

If DCM # 2 is truly planning on sending her child to preschool, then she'll tell you when she is ready.

If she doesn't mention anything, I would NOT say anything.

I wouldn't take DCM#1's words at face value since she is supposedly DCM#2's friend.

If she were truly her friend, why is she discussing her business with you behind her (DCM #2) back?

I'd believe and go by what each parent DIRECTLY tells YOU and nothing more.

Even if it's true. It's DCM #2's right and obligation to tell you herself.

i fully agree...

[mia]

I agree with the others....

Id wait til mid year then state that you are planning your spots to come the fall school year and need to have a final number come a certain time...

[TaylorTots]

Here preschools are half days. I would state say "I know you plan on keeping bobby here till kindergarten, but if you do decide to send him to any prek programs, my rate is the same." I have a 4 yo dcg that is in 3/4 preschool now and will be in 4/5 preschool next year. The dcf still pays my full time rate and arranges the transportation. I don't offer any half day rates, etc. Is the preschool program there full day?