Do I Take This New Family or Not?

[LeslieG]

So I just had an "interview" with a family this evening, which I was really excited for because their two kids would fill my last two vacant spots (I have never had a full daycare before).

Well… the kids were SO wild and out of control… and the parents don't do anything about it!!! They were just from one activity to the next, dumping toys and leaving them, throwing fits, mixing all the play dough colors together.. and then when the parents were trying to get them to leave (after a long drawn out hour) the younger one was taking toys off the shelf and throwing them, only to watch his mom continue to put them back… seriously, just discipline your kid, pick him up and leave!

So would I be crazy to take them?? My heart knows that I shouldn't because I love the group of kids that I have now and I just know that these new kids would completely disrupt the vibe of my current group. Yet, my head is saying "well, it's more money". What would you do?

[daycare]

two things.

first, always go with your gut, I have learned the hard way over this one. Money is never worth the pain...

Second, I never try to judge children when they are with their parents. Children will always behave better for us than they will their parents. Most parents are too afraid to take control of their child in front of us, worried about what we what say, do or think.

If you honestly think it won't work, don't do it,listen to you gut you know best.

But if you think there is a chance it would work, have them attend with a two week paid trial period and try it out. If it does not work out you can term during this time.

[cheerfuldom]

You can do a trial period if you have the guts to term if things go sour. if you cant do that, just dont even start them.

[jenn]

I agree with go with your gut.

However, some kids act absolutely insane with their parents, but are very manageable without the parents there. Some of my best behaved/mannerly DCK's become little monsters once their parents are present.

Make sure to include a trial period if you do decide to take them, just to protect yourself.

[Laurel]

two things.

first, always go with your gut, I have learned the hard way over this one. Money is never worth the pain...

Second, I never try to judge children when they are with their parents. Children will always behave better for us than they will their parents. Most parents are too afraid to take control of their child in front of us, worried about what we what say, do or think.

If you honestly think it won't work, don't do it,listen to you gut you know best.

But if you think there is a chance it would work, have them attend with a two week paid trial period and try it out. If it does not work out you can term during this time.

Laurel

[Josiegirl]

I'm not sure what I'd do but yes, kids can act crazy with their parents. If I really needed the income I'd opt for the 2 week trial and make sure dcm knows it's a TRIAL and you can term immediately within that time frame if it's not a good fit for either party.
Good luck! Maybe you can be the one to whip 'em into shape.

[Happily_wed]

I am new here so I hope it's ok to give my opinion. I agree with the two week trial period but get it in writing and make sure mom knows that you have the right to term after those two weeks if the kids just don't fit in with your program.

The little one that I have right now is perfectly behaved for me all day long and the minute mom walks in all hell breaks loose. They go from happy, well behaved and polite to whining, acting ugly and getting into all kinds trouble.

[Blackcat31]

I am new here so I hope it's ok to give my opinion. I agree with the two week trial period but get it in writing and make sure mom knows that you have the right to term after those two weeks if the kids just don't fit in with your program..

New or not, ALL opinions are welcome here!

I also wanted to point out that I do a two week trial period too but I don't say that if things don't work out I will term at the end of the two week trial period. I will term at ANY time (without notice) during the two week trial period.

Once I KNOW I don't want a kid in care or that they won't be a good fit, I'm done. That same day. I could never just tough it out for the whole two weeks if it were that bad..kwim?

The little one that I have right now is perfectly behaved for me all day long and the minute mom walks in all hell breaks loose. They go from happy, well behaved and polite to whining, acting ugly and getting into all kinds trouble.

Perfect example.

I see my best behaved, best mannered, most enjoyable child turn into a horrible nasty thing the minute her mom arrives each day....I always tell her mom that the little girl she has and the little girl I watch each day are NOT the same. Too bad for her (mom). ::

I try not to judge the kids too much when their parents are present but what I do make sure to do is make sure the parents understand my rules and what I expect of them daily and long term. If I don't feel they are going to be able to live up to my expectations, I pass.

If I feel they have potential, I do a trial period.

Sometimes, families surprise you. Parents and kids.

[Maria2013]

two things.

first, always go with your gut, I have learned the hard way over this one. Money is never worth the pain...

Second, I never try to judge children when they are with their parents. Children will always behave better for us than they will their parents. Most parents are too afraid to take control of their child in front of us, worried about what we what say, do or think.

If you honestly think it won't work, don't do it,listen to you gut you know best.

But if you think there is a chance it would work, have them attend with a two week paid trial period and try it out. If it does not work out you can term during this time.

[MyAngels]

I am new here so I hope it's ok to give my opinion. I agree with the two week trial period but get it in writing and make sure mom knows that you have the right to term after those two weeks if the kids just don't fit in with your program.

The little one that I have right now is perfectly behaved for me all day long and the minute mom walks in all hell breaks loose. They go from happy, well behaved and polite to whining, acting ugly and getting into all kinds trouble.

I do agree with BC that I'd make it clear that anytime during the trial you could term. I wouldn't want to wait two weeks with a couple of hellions ::.

I've had lots of kids over the years that were awesome for me and total stinkers for their parents, so it can be done .

[TwinKristi]

I agree... Kids are so different around their parents, and in a new environment especially, pushing those boundaries so far. I don't go over in depth that we have a 2wk trial but it's in my contract clearly.
I have had 2 families (cousins) who are "those kids" that people run from. When they were here they were pretty good, like a 6/10. But when their mom/aunt arrived they were crazy. One was ok for his mom but his aunt... No way! They would bolt out the door, run down the street (even in the dark!) and I told her they're still at my house and technically MY responsibility til they get in her car so she needs to control them. They'd get in the car and lock her out,, they'd get back out and run away.. They never did that stuff for me. They knew there would be a consequence with me but not with mom. Sadly I finally had to just realize no amount of money was worth the stress of watching them. They had a 45-15 schedule so I would have them 3wks at a time. I haven't watched them since Oct and she didn't even ask for winter thankfully! Hopefully taking on these kids will either motivate you (even just monetarily?) to get them on a routine and in your groove can change kids incredibly! Maybe they're over tired and fed junk food at home? Who knows! But maybe the consistency will help them and you're finally full! I was asked to watch 2 boys I watched a couple yrs ago before I was licensed and they were a hand full. Mom was financially in a bad position and I charged her a lower rate than I do now, I think I charged her like $20/day/kid. Anyway she need a few days for only a few hours until school starts but it just wasn't worth it to me to disrupt our whole routine for 2 SA boys who were a pain before! It just wasn't worth it. But 2 kids FT that would add a lot my income would be altogether different. LOL

[Maria2013]

I do agree with BC that I'd make it clear that anytime during the trial you could term. I wouldn't want to wait two weeks with a couple of hellions ::.

I've had lots of kids over the years that were awesome for me and total stinkers for their parents, so it can be done .

[renodeb]

What was I gonna say? Oh yeah Run!!!!!!!!!!
Remember not all money is good money.
Deb

[melilley]

Perfect example.

I see my best behaved, best mannered, most enjoyable child turn into a horrible nasty thing the minute her mom arrives each day....I always tell her mom that the little girl she has and the little girl I watch each day are NOT the same. Too bad for her (mom). ::

I have a term for this, I call it the "mom syndrome"!

[daycarediva]

I am new here so I hope it's ok to give my opinion. I agree with the two week trial period but get it in writing and make sure mom knows that you have the right to term after those two weeks if the kids just don't fit in with your program.

The little one that I have right now is perfectly behaved for me all day long and the minute mom walks in all hell breaks loose. They go from happy, well behaved and polite to whining, acting ugly and getting into all kinds trouble.

I have the same, but an immediate term if I know it won't work.

Also, I request a 1/2 day trial before I even start the 2 week trial. I usually have them come on a Friday from 8-12, and then I typically know if a child will be worth trying a trial period with or not.