No Card Or Gift From DCP..How Does It Make You Feel?

[Kabob]

This is my first year doing childcare so I wasn't sure what to expect. I got a mixed bag with families on opposite extremes. One family gave me nothing (not even an acknowledgement of the holidays) and then at 10pm on Christmas Eve asked for "free" days for the first week they came back because they wanted to extend their vacation.

Then another family made me a gift and a card with a gift card in it. They also gave a present to my son.

In the middle was a family that made cards for everyone.

I felt happy with all of the gifts (well except for the late Christmas Eve request that was denied) and frankly was just happy to end the year with families in my daycare. I actually don't like receiving gifts because I feel so awkward about it for some reason. I'd rather just have the gratitude in words and actions. I did try to meet everyone midway with cookies and stockings that the kids made here.

[sahm1225]

My husband asked me almost the same question (does it bother you when you don't get a gift).

I received gifts from every family (even former families that came to our holiday party and my drop-in only family) except one. The family that didn't give a gift didn't say merry Christmas or anything! But they are the family that pays on time, keeps sick child home, keeps child home when they are off work, and say 'thank you' every day at drop off and pick up. I'm beginning to wonder if they go out of their way to celebrate the holidays with our daycare when they don't even celebrate at home?

I was so grateful for all the gifts and the beautiful handwritten notes. I have been very blessed with amazing families. My feelings would be hurt if everything I do wasn't acknowledged with at least a few cards or notes. I know we shouldn't expect things, but I can't help it.

[lovepink]

no christmas gift

I had this day care child for 2 years. her parents never give a gift. IT DRIVES me CRAZY. The first year I went OVER Board with my daycare children and dcp. I worked from 6am-11:45 pm (2shifts) . Christmas 2013 I just got dcp a card and candy. My daycare child got the usual but Im not spending anything extra on those parents EVER!

[Happily_wed]

It would bother me to get absolutely nothing. I have had three families so far since I've been doing daycare. Each gave me a gift at Christmas. My current family has been with me during Christmas for the last four years. Three years I got nice gifts that I could really use and one year something that I am still not sure what to do with ::

I am a giver and I give the kids a little something for every holiday. Nothing expensive or fancy but a little bag of things for Easter, Valentine's Day, Halloween. I buy a nice gift for Christmas and their birthday. We also do a lot of crafts. I decorate with the crafts and then send them home after the holiday like someone else mentioned.

I have never gotten a thank you from daycare mom. Dad says thank you, I appreciate what you do for us, etc. all the time. But mom...never.

[Evansmom]

IMHO, This seems to have started happening in the last few years. It is hallmark Entitlement Generation (as the media have dubbed them) it seems :confused

I agree Cat Herder. 20 years ago when I started in the child care business I would get cash bonuses from DCPs. It was awesome especially bc at that time I was making minimum wage ($5.25 an hour way back then!). All the parents gave cash and collectively some years I would end up with hundreds of dollars. One year I got $300 dollars which more than paid for my daughter's Christmas. I also got sweet heartfelt cards that just made me glow. Parents would write a little note on how they loved the care their child got, how much the child was learning etc. I held onto those cards for years.

I don't care about the cash although it does ease the fact that at least for me this isn't a very profitable business since I work with small groups. But it really is the thought that counts. And all the little kindnesses we do, day in and day out, for their children and their families really deserve a sincere thank you.

The ingratitude is one big reason I closed my daycare a few months ago. I would consider opening again someday. But boy I sure have learned to be selective when it comes to families I hire.

[Laurel]

My husband asked me almost the same question (does it bother you when you don't get a gift).

I received gifts from every family (even former families that came to our holiday party and my drop-in only family) except one. The family that didn't give a gift didn't say merry Christmas or anything! But they are the family that pays on time, keeps sick child home, keeps child home when they are off work, and say 'thank you' every day at drop off and pick up. I'm beginning to wonder if they go out of their way to celebrate the holidays with our daycare when they don't even celebrate at home?

I was so grateful for all the gifts and the beautiful handwritten notes. I have been very blessed with amazing families. My feelings would be hurt if everything I do wasn't acknowledged with at least a few cards or notes. I know we shouldn't expect things, but I can't help it.

Right, I sometimes feel like I should be able to help it but can't seem to. We are only human after all.

Laurel

[melilley]

I know we shouldn't expect things, but I can't help it.

At least a thank you would be nice! My one family that didn't get me anything always complains to me about money issues so I totally understand, but a simple Thank You wold have been nice! I bend over backwards for this dcm and her shenanigans, which makes it even more irritating.

[sammyj]

Gifts

I dont mind not recieveing gifts from dcp but what bothers me is I give them a gift and none of them even acknowledge the gift after they take it home and see what it is and to top it all off most of them dont pay on time. The best gift and show of appreciation and respect I can get from parents is to be paid on time, have their children in dc on time and picked up on time. Basically follow the contract they signed. BTW I did get two gifts.

[Maria2013]

all I really want from parents is: respect for my rules (me my house) on time payments, drop off and pick up...

[renodeb]

Good post soccer mom,
To be really honest it does bother me when I dont even get a thoughtful card. I just want to fell appreciated. I don't ever expect gifts from the dc parents maybe just a nice card with a note thanks on it. This year my dc parents where very thoughtful/generous. The nicest gift I got this year was a 100 dollar check. It wasnt even so much the actual money but the that they thought that much of me. I almost cried when I opened it. And that mom is on maternity leave to and still thought to give me that.
To be honest I would rather get a nice card of thanks than something that looks like they just ran out and grabbed the first thing off the shelf.
That family that gave the 100 dollars was very unexpected but I felt like this when I opened it: happyface
The first year I was in business I gave the parents a gift and the kids but it just got to be to much. I have the kids (or help the kids) make a little something with there hand/footprint on it. This year it was mittens with there handprints on them and I made them into an ornament for there tree. I also did a little brown bag scrapbook with cute pictures of there kid taken through out the year. Each one thanked me for that. I sort of feel like I give all year long and don't need to give a gift at xmas on top of that. (Im not stingy just feel that way). I understand that a lot of people cant afford to give at xmas time and Im really fine with that but I really love to just be thanked.
I know exactly what you mean soccermom!