Safer DC/SChools?

[Unregistered]

How to keep our schools safer?

Yet another school shooting today. 2 dead (so far) in CO.

What do you do to keep your dch or dcc safe? What do the schools do?

Ours finally went to locking schools after the start time and you can only get in after showing your ID and talking to the monitor why you are there (i.e. pickups) then you have to sign child in/out.

I think the world has gone mad.

[Cradle2crayons]

How to keep our schools safer?

Yet another school shooting today. 2 dead (so far) in CO.

What do you do to keep your dch or dcc safe? What do the schools do?

Ours finally went to locking schools after the start time and you can only get in after showing your ID and talking to the monitor why you are there (i.e. pickups) then you have to sign child in/out.

I think the world has gone mad.

Our local elementary school does "intruder drills" to prepare children for the mass chaos of a situation such as this... Also there is only one door unlocked at the elementary school... The rest only open from the inside... This one door is right in front of the office... And you have to push a button on the intercom and look into the camera. Our school know every child's parents and grandparents etc. also there's a community sheriffs officer that stands there all day too.

[MarinaVanessa]

I'm one of those that would be okay with armed and well trained police officers/teachers on campus. Don't worry, I have my flame suit on and am ready. I'm a big girl, I can take it.

[Cradle2crayons]

I'm one of those that would be okay with armed and well trained police officers/teachers on campus. Don't worry, I have my flame suit on and am ready. I'm a big girl, I can take it.

Our community resource guy that stands at the entrance all day is an armed sheriffs deputy and I'm good with that.

As far as personal safety, I'm armed as well... Of course not on my hip with daycare kids here . And I follow all the required safety when daycare kids are here.

But I'm like you. I like our sheriff deputy

[Blackcat31]

I'm one of those that would be okay with armed and well trained police officers/teachers on campus. Don't worry, I have my flame suit on and am ready. I'm a big girl, I can take it.

I think that having armed and trained police officers on site and on duty is a "partial" fix or at the bare minimum an attempt to remedy this type of thing but I think that solution is like using a Band-Aid to fix a giant gaping wound.

I believe there IS a reason as to why this type of thing keeps repeating itself in society and I believe that reason starts back in the home.

It starts with personal responsibility and teaching our children right from wrong. It begins with morals and values and doing the "right" thing verses just doing what's best for you (general you).

The root of this issue started when society started using the us vs you mentality. Parents need to step up and stop excusing bad behavior or making excuses for it.

We (as a society) need to take a hard look at the no-tolerance/no bullying policies we have. Like a lot of rules, they sound great on paper but don't actually work in practice.

I have some VERY strong feelings about this subject. My child was bullyied. Badly. Every.Single.Year of his school years. Every single No Bullying rule was applied. They were ALL a joke and NONE helped. The same child and his group of friends continued to bully my child year after year after year.

My child could easily have been like anyone of those school shooters.

[Laurel]

I'm not sure what the answer is but I think a few things would at least be a step in the right direction.

I think we need to move toward a more non competitive school atmosphere where children are concerned. I loved a school that I sent my oldest to for a few years (before I had more children and couldn't afford it anymore). From the time they were 3 years old until 6th grade there was no competition among the children. Respect and co-operation were the rule. It was a very small school that was housed in a very large old house. It operated with a family atmosphere. It was a Montessori preschool through 6th grade. No letter grades were given, no honor rolls, no scores were kept during games like baseball at recess, etc.

That place felt so right. Conferences were the teachers telling the parents where their child needed help and how to help them. The place was small enough so everyone knew everyone. Children were grouped in 3 year age spans. Like 3-5 years, 6-9, etc.

I've read about other schools that were like this but were not Montessori.

We need to pay for real quality education that educates the whole child and does so in a way that doesn't make it some kind of a competition.

We also need help for parents whose children need intervention for physical and mental problems. In this country there should be no one that should want for the care they need because they can't afford it or don't have insurance.

We need to increase the efficiency of our social safety nets in this country. The foster care system is a mess in most places.

It seems like we have our priorities screwed up sometimes.

That said, I think there is less crime now then in the past. I looked that up once.

Laurel

[Laurel]

I think that having armed and trained police officers on site and on duty is a "partial" fix or at the bare minimum an attempt to remedy this type of thing but I think that solution is like using a Band-Aid to fix a giant gaping wound.

I believe there IS a reason as to why this type of thing keeps repeating itself in society and I believe that reason starts back in the home.

It starts with personal responsibility and teaching our children right from wrong. It begins with morals and values and doing the "right" thing verses just doing what's best for you (general you).

The root of this issue started when society started using the us vs you mentality. Parents need to step up and stop excusing bad behavior or making excuses for it.

We (as a society) need to take a hard look at the no-tolerance/no bullying policies we have. Like a lot of rules, they sound great on paper but don't actually work in practice.

I have some VERY strong feelings about this subject. My child was bullyied. Badly. Every.Single.Year of his school years. Every single No Bullying rule was applied. They were ALL a joke and NONE helped. The same child and his group of friends continued to bully my child year after year after year.

My child could easily have been like anyone of those school shooters.

On a Dr. Phil show not all that long ago about bullying he asked the audience members to stand up if they had ever been bullied. About 3/4 of them stood up.

Laurel

[Blackcat31]

On a Dr. Phil show not all that long ago about bullying he asked the audience members to stand up if they had ever been bullied. About 3/4 of them stood up.

Laurel

I dont know how old you are but I know that not many would have stood if it were my classmates. It happened but usually not repeatedly and not to the extent it happens now.

Kids got in trouble (not excused) for bullying. Parents doled out punishment if their kid was guilty... Now they dish out excuses.

Communities cared about each other and worked together to raise the neighborhood kids. Now families lock their doors, buy 24/7 security systems and pay a ton for insurance rates because the Warren's 12yr old vandalizes your house atleast twice a month and his mom doesnt think they should have to pay for it. Kwim?

[Lucy]

I've always thought how weird it was that our local schools are so lax. We can walk in freely and walk down all the halls where the classrooms are. I suppose if you're loitering around or looking into each room, someone would probably ask you what you need. But by that time, a lot of damage could be done.

They have signs saying visitors must sign in and wear a badge, but it is never enforced. A lot of times, there's nobody at the front desk in the office.

[Angelsj]

I'm one of those that would be okay with armed and well trained police officers/teachers on campus. Don't worry, I have my flame suit on and am ready. I'm a big girl, I can take it.

I agree with you. I also think BC has a major point. I even see this lack of personal responsibility at the college level. "Stupid teachers! Why should I do all that work? And what does grammar matter?" Instead of stepping up and doing better work, several student spend their time trying to get various teachers fired for giving them the grade they deserve. And it often works!!

We also have a serious lack of respect for teachers going on here. Even grade school kids often refer to their teachers by their first names, and talk about how their classroom is out of control. We need to have some discipline in place the teachers can use, and PARENTS NEED TO BACK THEM UP!!

[Laurel]

I dont know how old you are but I know that not many would have stood if it were my classmates. It happened but usually not repeatedly and not to the extent it happens now.

Kids got in trouble (not excused) for bullying. Parents doled out punishment if their kid was guilty... Now they dish out excuses.

Communities cared about each other and worked together to raise the neighborhood kids. Now families lock their doors, buy 24/7 security systems and pay a ton for insurance rates because the Warren's 12yr old vandalizes your house atleast twice a month and his mom doesnt think they should have to pay for it. Kwim?

I am 62. (Yikes that sounds old when I type it and when I say it but I don't feel it...well sometimes :

I hate to possibly start anything but I think it was a lot different back in the day because most mom's did not work outside the home. I honestly think that parents were more involved about where their children were and what they were doing when they both weren't exhausted after working all day.

It makes me truly sad to take my dck's to the park during the summer and find very few neighborhood children there if any. Most of them are at what they now call 'camp'. In other words, in daycare centers. When I was growing up, 'camp' meant the park program where we made lanyards and did arts and crafts or it was an actual camping experience for a week or two away from home.

I also wonder how 'scary' it actually is out there. Is it really so scary as I read that crime is down OR is it the 24 hour news who seems to make a living scaring everyone?

I think all this makes what we do so much more valuable. I know some parents both have to work so we all strive to give children the best we can.

Btw, I was bullied in elementary school. The teachers told my mom that they could keep me safe in school but once off of school property they couldn't. So my mom had a friend who had 2 sons. One was my age and one was older. They walked home with me to protect me. This is the really weird part of this story. This girl who bullied me as a child called me when I was married with 3 kids one day on Christmas no less! She had bullied me but after 3rd grade we moved and I never heard from her again until years later for that phone call. She called and said "Remember me?" in a taunting way. Wow, did I let her have it. I said "Yes, I remember you. You were that nasty girl that picked on me. What is your problem calling me? I told her she must have a problem and I felt sorry for her because she had nothing better to do on Christmas morning to call and be nasty. I went on about being happily married with 3 children and how did she even find me beings I now was married with a different last name? I told her she went to so much trouble and she should really go get some help because it was pitiful to have nothing better to do on Christmas." I guess that was pretty mean but boy did that feel good at the time. I've never heard from her again. Wow. It is not often you get to stand up for yourself when you are really able to.

Laurel

[MarinaVanessa]

I agree with you. I also think BC has a major point. I even see this lack of personal responsibility at the college level. "Stupid teachers! Why should I do all that work? And what does grammar matter?" Instead of stepping up and doing better work, several student spend their time trying to get various teachers fired for giving them the grade they deserve. And it often works!!

We also have a serious lack of respect for teachers going on here. Even grade school kids often refer to their teachers by their first names, and talk about how their classroom is out of control. We need to have some discipline in place the teachers can use, and PARENTS NEED TO BACK THEM UP!!

I also think that BC hit the nail on the head. But sadly, the truth of the matter is that it's not realistic to think that parents will step up and change their "never my child" "my child is special" "don't hurt my child's feelings" mentality.

So then you have to think about other options that, like BC says, are just a small bandage in the whole scope of things.

One thing that school shootings usually have in common is one or a combination of
a) one child felt bullied and did not have the proper coping skills
b) it was a no weapon zone
c) the child was taking medication for a disorder or should have been taking and stopped taking them
d) issues in the home

That's a whole heap of issues to fix right there. Children need to learn how to properly cope with with strong emotions. Getting bullied? Tell an adult, if they fail you your parent should take over and change your school if necessary and possibly therapy. It is NEVER okay to fight it out and definitely not to go on a shooting rampage. Children nowadays do CRAZY things that they justify in their heads! Having at least one well-trained person that is armed at all times on a school campus will greatly diminish the chances of a school shooting because people that want to shoot someone will think twice if there is any opposition whatsoever BUT there has to be a strong presence of that armed person(s). As far as medication goes ... well there's a whole slew of issues just right there. So many kids are heavily medicated on narcotic drugs in which a common side effect is depression and suicidal thoughts. I would add homicidal thoughts in there also but of course the pharmaceutical companies will never admit to that. Many times these kids are over-medicated or wrongly medicated and parents think that medication is going to "fix" their child.

I can't tell you how many times I hear people I know complain about how they feel for me and my ADHD DD because they think their little precious angel might also have ADHD ... um, no. Your child is NORMAL and nowhere near as active as my child is and I only medicate her when she is at school because her teachers have a hard enough time with 22 other children, the last thing they need is a buckwild child with ADHD wrecking havoc in their classrooms. I also take my DD to a psychiatrist and a behavioral therapist as well as take parenting classes and keep a consistent routine and enforce boundaries in my home. You are just a lazy inconsistent parent that for whatever reason thought that bringing a child into this world would be easy .

But the issue of parents not taking accountability for their own actions and for the actions of their children due to their parenting isn't necessarily a new issue. In high school I read an essay that has always stuck with me. It impacted me so much that I have always kept it. It's about a suicide, a botched suicide, and parents blaming Judas Preist for the actions of their sons. It was written in the 80's.