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When she follows your parents out the door to "spend time with them" $$$$
Then she will have enough to get home.
Where did she spend the night?
Then she will have enough to get home.
Where did she spend the night?
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UGH So sure enough, she hit my parents up and not only did they put her at the 4 seasons, they gave her money to that she could buy everyone stuff from disneyland.
They don't know how she is, they have not seen her in YEARS either. But my parents feel that they are making things right and I just kept out of it.
She is supposed to return here tomorrow where I will just leave a happy face, but I wrote her a long letter that I will give to her when she leaves.
My parents will only be here a few more months before they need to return home and I bet you now that she has them hooked they will be her new ATM...
My sister is one of the most intelligent people I have ever met, that makes the STUPIDEST decisions....... She has a PHD,but can't balance a checking account....Comment
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ugh.. I feel for you. Hope you have a decent Thanksgiving though. Sounds like a really uncomfortable situation. Hopefully your parents will wake up soon & stop enabling her.Comment
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Just to add some heat to the fire......My sister just called me to let me know that she is on her way to my house and that she will be here in time to eat dinner with us...................UGH.
I am treating my parents to mexican food, they have never had it. So my sister just invited herself to go out to eat with us and I know she will not have money to pay for her food. I am really about to blow my lid....
I want to put some tape on my mothers mouth....
JK I know that she is very excited about going..
Anyone want a sister??????
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You must be close to me! I'm about 8hrs from Disney too! What county are you in?Comment
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((Hugs)). It is hard having a family member like that but you know what? Ask yourself.... If she died tomorrow would you ONLY remember the crappy stuff about her?
Probably not. You'd probably remember only the good memories and not give a second thought to her current bad behaviors.
It's the holidays.... Why not give YOURSELF a gift and forgive and let it go?
IME people who behave like her do so for attention and in a way to make themselves feel better about something they are lacking in their inner selves.
Your sister would probably give anything to have your life.. She might be envious, embarrassed about her own choices, feel left out, alone or anxious.... Who knows but the point is she's your sister. She isn't a daily issue (just periodically) and since it is the holidays (a time for positives) why not just focus on whatever good you can find in this and be happy your entire family is all together, healthy, happy and loved.
Doesn't matter how you got there or who paid for what. In the end all that matters is you are together and you are family.
lovethis
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I hear you and you are very right. I think letting it all out and venting is a good start, which I got to do here. I did write her a letter telling her that I don't feel good about the way that she treats me. It feels horrible to only be contacted when she needs MONEY. A few years ago when I was dealing with a life threatening pregnancy, she was no where around. I called and tried to find her to come see me, but she would not even return my calls.((Hugs)). It is hard having a family member like that but you know what? Ask yourself.... If she died tomorrow would you ONLY remember the crappy stuff about her?
Probably not. You'd probably remember only the good memories and not give a second thought to her current bad behaviors.
It's the holidays.... Why not give YOURSELF a gift and forgive and let it go?
IME people who behave like her do so for attention and in a way to make themselves feel better about something they are lacking in their inner selves.
Your sister would probably give anything to have your life.. She might be envious, embarrassed about her own choices, feel left out, alone or anxious.... Who knows but the point is she's your sister. She isn't a daily issue (just periodically) and since it is the holidays (a time for positives) why not just focus on whatever good you can find in this and be happy your entire family is all together, healthy, happy and loved.
Doesn't matter how you got there or who paid for what. In the end all that matters is you are together and you are family. lovethis
I am at the point in my life that I realize that we will never get along, never have a positive relationship and if I was truly reacting to the way I really feel, she would not even be coming to my home.
BUT I am doing it for my parents, because it has been 22 years since all of us have been under the same roof.
I won't mutter a word to her about any of this and will ask for the gift of peace in my home over the holiday. When she leaves I will give her the letter.
It won't resolve anything with her, but I will feel better about being able to say what I feel.....
Thanks for the reminder BCComment
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Or I can drink it all away over a nice tall vodka soda..... JK..... I can't drink alcohol when my parents are around.
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I hope everything goes smoothly for you! That is a tough situation to be in.
Keep us updated!
Happy Thanksgiving!Comment
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help me find my ability to calm myself.
so last night on the drive back my sis car has issues. The check engine light came on, but makes it to my house.
She comes in tell me my car is not working let me have yours so I can take your daughter to the movies. BTW we still have not gone to dinner yet. I still needed my car to take my parents out to eat.
Um no, I need my car. She ends up taking my sons car and leaves her special needs child with me. I don't really know him, I have not seen him in 4 years.
So I am beyond angry at this point. It all happened so fast, I didn't really even catch what was going on.
They don't return until after midnight.... I worked all day and then was up all night taking care of her son who was scream crying for his mom. Poor guy.
Then this morning she wakes and tells me I need to fix my car, you need to drop me off over here. UM NO, I have to work.
Now she is trying to get me to write checks to her for some stuff I bought from her school fundraiser, her child asked me to buy. I already gave her the checks the other day when she stopped here on her way to Disneyland. I am sooooo angry right now.
is the day over yet??Comment
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Deep breathes N.
She is asking because she thinks it is going to get her what she wants. Just keep saying no.
She is behaving like an overgrown toddler and trying to get her way by using immature tactics and guilt trips.
This is a great time to practice being calm while using your backbone.
In this scenario, you have nothing to lose...no one to term or give their 2 weeks notice so....**** it up Buttercup and start using your inner strength to get you through this....
No is an easy word to use but a hard one to enforce.
Just say it and walk away.
You CAN do this.
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Go stand in the bathroom and SCREAM, take a deep breath, and stand up straight.
Look Sis in the eyes and say "NO!"Comment
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Thanks guys. I feel better just getting it out.
I went to the bathroom and cried instead.
I just had to get it out before it ate at me.
Now you can see how unspoken I am. I always fear conformation.Comment
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