Terming! Ugh, Today Needs To End

[Great Beginnings]

So I posted earlier about the poor boy that appears to have an ear infection and the mother not wanting to pick up because she pays for all days now with no sick time. So shortly after pick up I get an email from her. I am currently 2 months pregnant. She is concerned I am taking on too much and is wondering how the baby will affect her children. Seriously I am so livid!! First don't insult me by saying my baby is taking on anything. It allows for 9 months of planning, how the heck is that taking on too much?? I took a step back and thought hormones were reacting but after speaking with some provider friends I am terming! How will the baby affect your child?? The same way it would if I took on another client! It wouldn't!! I only have 4 children during the day, with one going to school by time the baby comes. That leaves 4 children still including the baby! I am speaking to dh about loosing the income and terming but apparently this mother is looking for more of a nanny than home daycare!

[JoseyJo]

I feel your pain! ***! What is wrong w/ parents these days? My last group of children was great, but now that most have aged out and gone to kindy it has been nothing but trouble

[julie]

Yup, very inconsiderate. I am also pregnant, but my clients have the good sense to keep their kids home when they are sick or fighting off something.

Your baby will not affect the kid, but a sick kid could affect you and therefore affect the baby. Being sick and pregnant is no fun. Neither is constantly stressing about whether or not a family will stay because you didn't involve them in your decision to get pregnant. You let them know WAY before I let my parents know, and gave her months to plan.

Good for you for terming, and good riddance to them.

[Great Beginnings]

Maybe it's hormones but I was so offended! I was literally in tears over this! It's not until June, 7 months away and I even know who will be backup and what will happen should I go into labor while doing daycare!

The thing is that I never said anything about her needing to get her sick child because I was pregnant. He has an ear infection and is in pain. I can't catch an ear infection so it never crossed my mind! She figures she pays regardless so she will abuse it and then blame the baby.

[DaycareMom]

I had this same thing happen to me. I got pregnant, and 2 days after I had my son, DCM called and termed. I ended up finding out she was messaging the other DCPs on Facebook asking if they thought I would be able to handle it. Obviously they thought I could, because they all stayed with me.
The thing is, she couldn't handle her children. Everytime the kids were with me, they were good. As soon as she showed up, they were different kids.
I was happy that they left. The lack of income was tough, but the lack of stress made up for it!
Good luck!

[lovemylife]

I had this same thing happen to me. I got pregnant, and 2 days after I had my son, DCM called and termed. I ended up finding out she was messaging the other DCPs on Facebook asking if they thought I would be able to handle it. Obviously they thought I could, because they all stayed with me.
The thing is, she couldn't handle her children. Everytime the kids were with me, they were good. As soon as she showed up, they were different kids.
I was happy that they left. The lack of income was tough, but the lack of stress made up for it!
Good luck!

I had a similar thing happen to me! The family was with me for 3 years and the mom and I were friends. I took her child overnight multiple times just to be nice. My first day back from maternity leave (1 week) she terminated care! I have never been so hurt by a family terming!

[TLEMom]

I would email her back and say don't worry my baby will have no effect on your child. You are termed.

[Shell]

I would email her back and say don't worry my baby will have no effect on your child. You are termed.

I am mad for you Definitely term this family- you don't need the stress or aggravation! Let her take her nonsense elsewhere, and don't give them a second thought!

[nannyde]

I lost half my daycare when my son was born and he was adopted 13 years ago. I had a day and evening shift and didn't even TELL anyone about the possibility of my getting him until a couple of months before he was born. I didn't know when he would be born and I needed at least a full week off plus the week he was born.

Mass exodus. They didn't want me to have an unknown week off and some felt I would have favortism.

13 months after ds was born my biz was full on both shifts and we saved enough to buy a house twice the size.

Don't sweat it. Just tell her thanks for thinking of you and you can't answer her question. You don't know how the baby will affect anyone or anything.... and that's a GREAT problem to have. Tell her you and your family are SO excited about the baby and feel so blessed. lovethis

When this baby is going to her first day of kindy you won't remember this Mother's name. When she has her first date this family won't cross your mind. When she graduates college you won't think of them as she is crossing the stage.

Every day you open the door to let this Mom in sing yourself a little Pink Floyd...“All in all you're just another brick in the wall." then smile all the way to the bank.

[Unregistered]

When I was pregnant AND the other mom was pregnant, she termed care due to my pregnancy and impending birth...

I was only going to take 2 weeks off and..

THE BABY WASN'T EVEN MINE!

So how she thought I wouldn't be able to do daycare after birth? I'll never know.

Then when I was having my actually own twins, I had 2 parents who left because they thought twins would be too hard. Um, seriously? What's hard is not having income!

It was not that bad. Luckily I had a mom sign up her infant (about 2 weeks younger than my twins) and it was like having triplets. I just got me a huge stroller and lugged the kids where we wanted/needed to go and had a blast!

So, IDK why people think having babies makes it harder. What about if I had done infant care? Then what?

[Josiegirl]

Nannyde is so right about this.
Keep thinking about your new baby growing every day inside you and try not to let this asinine dcm get to you. She's not worth it.

[cheerfuldom]

wow I have the total opposite experience. I have four kids, three pregnancies during daycare.

One time I was nervous about the changes that would come after my second daughter was born. A daycare mom assured me that it would all work out and they loved me and they would stick through any transitions, blah blah blah. No I did not talk to her about my concerns, she came to me to say that they were staying. The FIRST time she walked in and I was holding my infant and not her son, she termed immediately. Lied to me and called over the weekend saying they needed his backup clothing because they ran out of clean laundry.....I know I was so stupid to believe them because who runs out of every piece of clothing and goes to the daycare for a couple of onesies? so she gets her things over the weekend and never comes back Monday, no call or anything. I finally tracked her down and she made a bunch of excuses and didnt want to give any paid notice (per the contract). She finally coughed up the full two weeks because I made it clear that it was not okay to lie and sneak out on me and I think she was really embarassed she got caught. as if I would never call to see what happened to them.

The other experiences I have had is parents being MAD when I couldnt take their infants on as I was expecting my own. or I have had to downsize a bit at times because I felt I over extended myself after the birth of a child. Parents who are like "it is just one extra infant, whats the big deal?" and have no concept of why a person could not handle many infants. They are mad when they call and I dont have space for more infants and they seemingly dont understand that there are ratios in place for a reason!