DBF Made A Comment About Grocery Bill...

[coolconfidentme]

I am curious, how did he react when you and DD were eating a gourmet meal and he had to eat ramen?

(giggle, snicker, snort)

[melilley]

My dh and I have a couple of accounts together, each serves a purpose. Most of the dc money goes to groceries and to the Jeep payment, with a little left over. His money goes to everything else, another car payment, stuff for the kids, our camper, mortgage, household bills, etc.... Can you tell he makes so much more than me...

Now, my sis and her dh both have separate accounts and they divide everything up and each pays what they agreed on and then stuff they both buy things for their kids.

I know he's just a dbh, but you are living together and he should help pay bills. Maybe you two can sit down and divide up the bills, evenly if possible. That way each of you know what bills need to be paid and who will pay them and that ends the fighting.

By the way, I think it's awesome that you are having him eat Ramen while you are eating yummy food! Maybe he'll realize that if he helps more with groceries that he can eat well too.....then again maybe not.

[Childminder]

I came to this thread today to see how he liked his Ramen noodles?

[Brooksie]

I am curious, how did he react when you and DD were eating a gourmet meal and he had to eat ramen?

I came to this thread today to see how he liked his Ramen noodles?

DD ate before us. (she has food allergies and generally eats special foods) I told him he had Ramen in the pantry and he actually made it himself :: Then he realized I was still cooking a good meal for myself. He kept quiet and took his noodles upstairs to watch the hockey game (was his plan before the noodles) and I ate my delicious dinner downstairs with some TV of my choice. I think he knows whats going on, but I'm curious to see how he handles his noodles again tonight

[boysx5]

I guess I'm just old fashioned.

I just don't get the "mine" and "yours" money thing.

For the past 32 years we have only had "our" money.

I agree

[daycare]

I over looked the part that said it is your BF......

I would have done this to a BF if I had a playful relationship with him.

My husband sounds like your BF. When we started dating he was 32 still living at home with mommy and daddy and mommy did EVERYTHING including paying his bills for him. When I married him years later, I practically had to rip the bills out of her hands.

When we were dating, I did not have our money, he had his and I had mine. Can't believe that I am telling you this, because it's embarrassing and makes me very angry, but his mommy paid for my wedding ring and engagement ring.

We don't have money with issues now, I basically take care of it all, he has his own account and then puts money in the joint for bills to be paid. We split the bills (well when he was employed) 50-50 and then have our own accounts and spend what we have in there how we want.

I don't cook or do laundry any more because no one was helping me and I was doing everything so I went on strike and basically refused to do anything to let my husband and kids see what it was like when I didn't do everything.

now they all help me.

This is kind of funny. Let us know how night 2 goes of yummy noodle soup

[MarinaVanessa]

The other night dbf and I were having a money argument (are there other kinds?) and I made a comment about how I've carried this month in groceries. He apparently doesn't see himself as a part of this family unit because he complained that all the money goes to me and DD and feeding the DCKs (I don't even feed them except for basic snack). He said that he was fine to eat ramen everyday so he didn't feel the need to chip in....

So I went to the grocery store again today because I had to. Spent another $85.00 to bring my share, this month only, up to $440.00 (he, I think, has chipped in about $60 in addition to what I've spent). So while I was there I picked hi up some ramen. I plan to cook him ramen everynight for as long as he can stand it while I continue to cook real meals for myself...

Tonight its garlic and peppercorn marinaded chicken breast with shallot and bacon sauteed asparagus topped with Parmesan. Low blow? I think not...

Any one have a bet on how long he lasts? !!

Gosh, you're so nice ... I wouldn't have cooked the ramen for him. Id have given him a vague idea of where the ramen was and had him hunt for it (after puttin in the most akward place I could find) and had him cook it himself.

I used to make my DH home-made chicken soup when he was sick until the one time that I got sick and I asked him to warm up a can of Campbell's Soup and he said no. Oh yeah! ... ok. Last time I made him anything when he was sick. ::. If you can't appreciate me I show you what you'll be missing . He regrets it now but knows he was an @$$.

I have a saying that I tell my DH every so often ... perhaps you can share with your DBF ... Treat me well and I'll move mountains for you, treat me badly and I'll drop those mountains on your balls ::.

Curious to know if you followed through or not and what he said if you did

[daycare]

Gosh, you're so nice ... I wouldn't have cooked the ramen for him. Id have given him a vague idea of where the ramen was and had him hunt for it (after puttin in the most akward place I could find) and had him cook it himself.

I used to make my DH home-made chicken soup when he was sick until the one time that I got sick and I asked him to warm up a can of Campbell's Soup and he said no. Oh yeah! ... ok. Last time I made him anything when he was sick. ::. If you can't appreciate me I show you what you'll be missing . He regrets it now but knows he was an @$$.

I have a saying that I tell my DH every so often ... perhaps you can share with your DBF ... Treat me well and I'll move mountains for you, treat me badly and I'll drop those mountains on your balls ::.

Curious to know if you followed through or not and what he said if you did

hahahahhahahahhahahah OMG I can't stop laughing I think I just woke some children
::::

[sally]

My ex boyfriend was like that. He had his money and I had mine. We split bills and groceries but he got to where if he put gas in my car because we were going to the city for something for him he would deduct that amount from his share. Eventually I was paying all the bills and kicked him out. My husband and I have a joint account and everything is ours together.

[jenboo]

Gosh, you're so nice ... I wouldn't have cooked the ramen for him. Id have given him a vague idea of where the ramen was and had him hunt for it (after puttin in the most akward place I could find) and had him cook it himself.

I used to make my DH home-made chicken soup when he was sick until the one time that I got sick and I asked him to warm up a can of Campbell's Soup and he said no. Oh yeah! ... ok. Last time I made him anything when he was sick. ::. If you can't appreciate me I show you what you'll be missing . He regrets it now but knows he was an @$$.

I have a saying that I tell my DH every so often ... perhaps you can share with your DBF ... Treat me well and I'll move mountains for you, treat me badly and I'll drop those mountains on your balls ::.

Curious to know if you followed through or not and what he said if you did

haha you are so funny!!:: there was another thread where you were talking about all the things you did to your DH (hiding his shoes when he would leave them out) I told my DH about it...he didnt think it was as funny as I thought it was...I told him to be careful because im learning all kinds of new tricks

[Brooksie]

I have a saying that I tell my DH every so often ... perhaps you can share with your DBF ... Treat me well and I'll move mountains for you, treat me badly and I'll drop those mountains on your balls ::.

Curious to know if you followed through or not and what he said if you did

LMAO!!! I am totally going to tell him that. So funny. I did follow through last night and picked up a few more packs of Ramen at Target today. I plan on giving him the $1.10 bill as well ::

He didn't say anything last night so I'm looking forward to seeing what he says tonight. I'll keep you posted!

I over looked the part that said it is your BF......

I would have done this to a BF if I had a playful relationship with him.

My husband sounds like your BF. When we started dating he was 32 still living at home with mommy and daddy and mommy did EVERYTHING including paying his bills for him. When I married him years later, I practically had to rip the bills out of her hands.


This is kind of funny. Let us know how night 2 goes of yummy noodle soup

OMG your DH sounds like DBFs long lost brother. They must have the same Mother!!! She still handles his other bills and he told me when he moved in it would be my job :: No way. Luckily she won't hand them over to me. I also have a feeling when I get an engagement ring it will be coming from his parents.

[Brooksie]

FYI tonight's menu is Chicken, Broccoli and pasta with an asiago alfredo sauce. His FAVE. !!! His Ramen is sitting on the counter waiting for him...

[Michael]

I have a saying that I tell my DH every so often ... perhaps you can share with your DBF ... Treat me well and I'll move mountains for you, treat me badly and I'll drop those mountains on your balls ::.

Gosh Vanessa tell us how you really feel! ::

I am lucky to have my wife. She stuck with me through thick and thin when we were younger and I will never forget her for it. She always asks or phones me if she can buy this or do that and I tell her she doesn't need to ask me. I trust her but she asks anyway. There needs to be respect in any relationship for it to last.

[countrymom]

I don't know, but I think food should be shared equally. There is no "my food your food" in my house, heck your lucky if we have leftovers. Regardless if your feeding the daycare kids or not, that food bill needs to be split in half. I've been married a long time, this silly behavior would never fly here. If your fighting over grocery money, maybe you guys shouldn't live together yet. Yes, every one needs to iron things out, but fighting over food is not a good sign.

instead of treating him like a boyfriend, maybe treat him like a roommate instead. You pay half and he pays half.

[MarinaVanessa]

Gosh Vanessa tell us how you really feel! ::

I am lucky to have my wife. She stuck with me through thick and thin when we were younger and I will never forget her for it. She always asks or phones me if she can buy this or do that and I tell her she doesn't need to ask me. I trust her but she asks anyway. There needs to be respect in any relationship for it to last.

Don't get me wrong, I love him do death and I say it playfully. There are plenty of things that my DH does that are wonderful and considerate that far outweigh the bad. It's just sometimes he gets into this "I'm the next closest thing to God" mentality, no joke he really says that, and I have to bring him back down to earth.

I find that (in our case) he doesn't realize that some things he does are a big deal to me and are important no matter how many times I tell him. If in his mind things are not a big deal or there is a better way then his way is the way. It's difficult for him to see things from another person's perception and reality is perception, people always see things differently. I just remind him by playing tricks on him and that helps him see and gets me results. In a lot of ways he's a lot like a daycare parent ... if it doesn't inconvenience him in any way then it's not on his mind. The mountains saying is just a reminder that I'll do anything for him but don't take it for granted, reciprocate ... like if you're sick and I ALWAYS take care of you and make you soup then warm up a damn bowl of soup in the microwave for me the ONE TIME that I get sick lovethis.