Just Wow

[daycare]

I started a new child last week. full time age 4.5.

Child is still on a paci
still in diapers
talks, but very hard to understand
lots of other things going on
NO self help skills at all

He's a very sweet little boy. He's very smart and is showing a lot of progress

Yesterday I talked with mom and gave her a list of things that we will be working on.


A) feeding self
B) Sitting down during meal time
C) NO more paci
D) using the toilet
E) Self help skills


DCM tells me well I just don't think hes ready for all of this yet. I need to rethink if I want to continue care with you or not!!




Maybe DCK will be the first child to go to college in diapers..............

[daycarediva]

You attract some weird ones!!! I would want a developmental evaluation! My 4.5 dck is doing EVERYTHING for herself, is starting to read and is all but ready for K. We just have to work on the nap before she starts K in fall (still needs a good 2 hours).

[NeedaVaca]

Wow! This mom will get a wake up call when he starts K...Does she not realize how far behind his peers he is?

[Annalee]

Chances are the dcm is just as high-maintenanced as the dck is.....sad! :confused:

[dave4him]

My daughter turned 3 in Aug and wants nothing to do with potty training. I know 4.5 is not too far away so I hope she is in panties by then. You sound kind of judgmental. The paci I agree with, but seriously the kid might have other issues going on.

[Unregistered]

I would assume if issues were going on, mom should have discussed with OP.

OP, 4.5 is VERY late for PT if no diagnosed issues have been uncovered. I wouldn't work with a mom that HID any issues, either.

The fact she has her head in the clouds, that's insane. A binky at 4 1/2 yo is unacceptable and laziness on her part. She wants to rethink care with you because you want to help her child? She's nuts. RUN>

[Unregistered]

My daughter turned 3 in Aug and wants nothing to do with potty training. I know 4.5 is not too far away so I hope she is in panties by then. You sound kind of judgmental. The paci I agree with, but seriously the kid might have other issues going on.

She didn't say he should be potty trained, she said she wanted to work on it. I would kill myself if I had a 4.5 year old in diapers- and they had no special needs.

[Blackcat31]

Wow! That IS crazy!

I also thought you didn't even enroll kids on this level... (developmentally)

I thought you only provided services to kids who were potty trained and verbal.

Did any of this information get shared with you during the interview?

[NeedaVaca]

My daughter turned 3 in Aug and wants nothing to do with potty training. I know 4.5 is not too far away so I hope she is in panties by then. You sound kind of judgmental. The paci I agree with, but seriously the kid might have other issues going on.

Doesn't seem judgmental to me :confused:, sounds like she is trying to help get him caught up to where he should be developmentally. This child is way behind.

[DaycareMom]

I started a new child last week. full time age 4.5.

Child is still on a paci
still in diapers
talks, but very hard to understand
lots of other things going on
NO self help skills at all

He's a very sweet little boy. He's very smart and is showing a lot of progress

Yesterday I talked with mom and gave her a list of things that we will be working on.


A) feeding self
B) Sitting down during meal time
C) NO more paci
D) using the toilet
E) Self help skills


DCM tells me well I just don't think hes ready for all of this yet. I need to rethink if I want to continue care with you or not!!




Maybe DCK will be the first child to go to college in diapers..............

Wow! That is crazy. Was any of this discussed at interview? I would have either told her no way or discussed working on the self help skills at interview.

[melilley]

I'm guessing she didn't tell you any of this before enrolling? Is it a cultural thing? Is this child delayed or just not doing things because the parents have that attitude that he's not ready?

If it's not developmental, she's probably going to have a hard time finding anywhere for him to go. You said he's making progress, so hopefully he will stay so you can help him!

It's so interesting to hear your stories, and I agree, you do get some strange families!

[Leigh]

I started a new child last week. full time age 4.5.

Child is still on a paci
still in diapers
talks, but very hard to understand
lots of other things going on
NO self help skills at all

He's a very sweet little boy. He's very smart and is showing a lot of progress

Yesterday I talked with mom and gave her a list of things that we will be working on.


A) feeding self
B) Sitting down during meal time
C) NO more paci
D) using the toilet
E) Self help skills


DCM tells me well I just don't think hes ready for all of this yet. I need to rethink if I want to continue care with you or not!!




Maybe DCK will be the first child to go to college in diapers..............

I am generally very tolerant of kids who aren't "caught up" with others their age. I have a high percentage of foster kids with neglect in their backgrounds, and understand that they may need some time to get caught up developmentally.

I would not take a 4.5 year old who is unable to feed himself. I do not have time to feed a child who is capable of self-feeding.

A pacifier at age 4.5 really is just bad parenting, IMO. You can't understand him because he learned to talk with a danged pacifier in his mouth-it's normal to him to not move his tongue and mouth the "right" way to talk.

Sitting down during meals would be easy-if he didn't sit, he would be done with his meal. At 18 months, I would tolerate it, at 4.5, no way.

Kids toilet train when they are ready to. I can deal with a 3.5 yo who isn't quite there, but at 4.5, I think that's a little extreme.

I would just work on the things that you told her you would, and if she wants to pull because of it, I would let her walk away. It's a fine line between letting the parent do their job the way they wish to and what we can demand as providers (it makes me shudder to think of a 4.5 yo with a paci!). The pacifier, I wouldn't push with Mom too much. If it were me, I'd purchase the same paci he uses, cut the end off, and allow him only that one at my home.

The toileting really is the job of the parent, too-I'd support their efforts, and probably put in plenty effort of my own, but I'd push very hard for that-who wants to change a 4.5 yo's poopy diaper?!

Sitting down at meals is simply a "house rule", they follow it or they have their consequence. I would not negotiate that with a parent.

I think that you need to consider what you will and won't put up with. I put up with things that annoy me that I consider parental choice. I won't put up with my house rules being broken, and I won't bend them for a lazy parent.

[dave4him]

sorry im just sensitive to people talking about developmental delays. Hope you can help the mom see the reality.

[Scout]

I started a new child last week. full time age 4.5.

Child is still on a paci
still in diapers
talks, but very hard to understand
lots of other things going on
NO self help skills at all

He's a very sweet little boy. He's very smart and is showing a lot of progress

Yesterday I talked with mom and gave her a list of things that we will be working on.


A) feeding self
B) Sitting down during meal time
C) NO more paci
D) using the toilet
E) Self help skills


DCM tells me well I just don't think hes ready for all of this yet. I need to rethink if I want to continue care with you or not!!




Maybe DCK will be the first child to go to college in diapers..............

Holy lord! This poor child. This.makes.me.sad.

[Unregistered]

If this was not disabled....
I think I would have to discuss with what I would charge for a 4.5 year infant....