Possible New Job For DH

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  • DaycareMom
    Daycare.com Member
    • Nov 2011
    • 381

    Possible New Job For DH

    Currently my DH works 6 am-6 pm, which works great for me as he leaves before any DCKs get here and they are all gone before he comes home.

    He just was telling me there is an opening in his company that he wanted to do. He wouldn't have to deal with the boss who he doesn't like and he would have a job he liked better (I guess). The only problem is that the hours would start sometime in the afternoon and go into night shift (so we would all be sleeping by the time he got home).

    I absolutely HATE this idea! He would be here all morning and not that I don't want to be around him but when DCKs are here, I am working and in Work mode, ykwim? Plus when he is here, he tries to take over in an effort to help me which drives me crazy!We also would never have any alone time

    Do any of your DHs have a job with weird hours or who have experienced this or who have any insight/help/advice regarding this?

    TYIA!
  • Unregistered

    #2
    Originally posted by DaycareMom
    Currently my DH works 6 am-6 pm, which works great for me as he leaves before any DCKs get here and they are all gone before he comes home.

    He just was telling me there is an opening in his company that he wanted to do. He wouldn't have to deal with the boss who he doesn't like and he would have a job he liked better (I guess). The only problem is that the hours would start sometime in the afternoon and go into night shift (so we would all be sleeping by the time he got home).

    I absolutely HATE this idea! He would be here all morning and not that I don't want to be around him but when DCKs are here, I am working and in Work mode, ykwim? Plus when he is here, he tries to take over in an effort to help me which drives me crazy!We also would never have any alone time

    Do any of your DHs have a job with weird hours or who have experienced this or who have any insight/help/advice regarding this?

    TYIA!
    My husband works 12-9 Monday-Wednesday and 8-5 Thursday and Friday. I love it and I hate it at the same time. It's nice that we don't have to take off time for doctors appointments or find a sub. But on a normal day it gets annoying!! Always in the way and wanting me to stop working and spend time with him?? Plus he wants to watch tv or do something that he can't around the kids. It can get frustrating. Good luck!!

    Comment

    • Tdhmom
      Daycare.com Member
      • Jun 2013
      • 314

      #3
      My husband used to work 5am until 9-10pm almost every single day! He was trying to get his company started and still holding down his full time job for the steady income. We never seen him. It was horrible for myself and our kids. I felt like a single mom and my family is 45 minutes from us (1 1/2 hours round trip) so we couldn't just go over to my dads to visit for an hour.

      2 months ago he quit his full time job to become self employed and he is a completely different person!!! He isn't sleep deprived and hateful anymore. He enjoys spending every free minute with us! It makes a huge difference if they don't hate their job. Now he still works fairly early in the morning (depending on how cold it is) and isn't home until past dark, but he at least makes it home for dinner now. And he has random days off (if the weather is bad).

      Not sure if any of that will help but that's been my experience with oddball hours. I hope everything works out for the best for you two!!

      Comment

      • permanentvacation
        Advanced Daycare.com Member
        • Jun 2011
        • 2461

        #4
        I don't know if you guys have occasion to be with each other so much that you get on each other's nerves, but by him having those work hours, you might treasure the time that you do have together more. You could plan date night for the days he's off in the evening. Or hire a daycare sub for a couple of hours and go to breakfast together or something during the day every once in a while.

        I would talk to him about not wanting him to 'help' with daycare if you can figure out how to tell him without hurting his feelings or starting a fight. It sounds like he is trying to help relieve you of some of the work/pressure you have with your job and is trying to spend some time with you doing what you have to be doing at the time that he is with you. So, if you can figure out something that he does better than you with the kids and let that be 'his thing' to do with them. For example if you have kids that might like to play sports, you could get him to get the kids playing soccer, kickball, etc. Or if he's a handyman kind of guy, see if he will do projects with the kids like build a birdhouse or something. Or if he likes to cook, (and if you provide the meals) get him to cook all the meals for the kids for the day. You can think of it as if you had an employee (don't tell him I said that! It might not go over well!) But, if you had an employee during the time that he is available to help you, what would you like your employee to do?

        Comment

        • Scout
          Daycare.com Member
          • Aug 2012
          • 1774

          #5
          I think I would consider the fact that if this job would make him happier it will make your marriage happier. Perhaps it will make weekend time together all the more special. My husband used to make way better money when we first got married but, he HATED his job and his boss. He would come home from working a 12 hour day each day miserable and it got to the point that it wore me down as well. He lost that job due to layoffs and has since had a job where he takes care of residents in a nursing home but, makes squat...I'll take the squat and happier hubby any day!

          Comment

          • melilley
            Daycare.com Member
            • Oct 2012
            • 5155

            #6
            My dh works weird hours. On Mondays he goes to work at 2pm until nighttime and for the rest of the week he's home between 1:30 and 3:00pm and sometimes has a day off during the week. (he's a retail manager so has weird hours) To be honest, I like it when doesn't come home until later....shhh.

            I love him and everything, but sometimes when he is here, it gets to be too much. I get frustrated with him because when I'm trying to cook, he's in the kitchen, or I'm trying to do things with the kids, he's watching tv (my daycare room is our living room and our family room where the tv is, is a dining room away) and as the kids get louder, the tv gets louder, if he decides to give our ds a bath, he'll call me to get him no matter what I'm doing (he gets in the shower right after) and doesn't realize that I have other kids or I'm making food and he wants something else and has the nerve to ask if I will make it-it's not like I just made and cleaned up for 5 other people. I just don't think he get's that I have up to 4 other kids plus our ds.


            But then sometimes he can be a little help and it is nice.

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